


Contractual Obligations

by DreadPirateBrown



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Laura is a top, Politics, Smut, Switch!hollstein, this is gonna be long
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-01
Updated: 2018-06-13
Packaged: 2019-03-25 16:55:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 48,356
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13839066
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DreadPirateBrown/pseuds/DreadPirateBrown
Summary: New York City AU. No monsters, no vampires, just broody gays, tiny gays and the city that will eat you alive.Carmilla is a badass organizer in NYC, but her world is thrown for a loop when she meets a particular Education Director. Sparks fly, but will the past let Carmilla be?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So I don’t know about how long this will be yet, I have two end points in mind, depending on what Hollstein wants to do, but I thought I’d just see what happens if I mix two parts chemistry and one part politics. 
> 
> Expect eventual or non-eventual smut, other characters to appear, angst, fights, political jargon & an uncertain evolution.
> 
> EDIT: Ok, so 8 chapters in I suddenly figured out what I really wanted to do with this and sketched out the next 6 months of their lives, so we may be here a while. If that sounds good to you, cool, get comfy!
> 
> Thanks for reading!

 

Carmilla Karnstein sat at her desk and sighed at her computer screen. It was filled with windows of spreadsheets, local maps and half written emails. She lifted her head and looked out the window beyond her cubicle. She could see the top of City Hall and it’s weathervane, the Brooklyn Bridge approach in the distance.

She hadn’t grown up in New York City, far from it, and the Newsies obsessed child in her couldn’t help but smile a little inside at the sight. It still hit her as so strange from time to time that she was actually here. A place that had only existed behind a tv screen was now just on the other side of the window.

Snapping her focus back to her task, Carmilla finished up a few emails to her partner organizations about their mutual events and checked the time. She should probably get going.

Turning back around to the rest of the office, she made eye contact with a few of her team and quirked her head toward the Launchpad, their meeting space. They gathered up their belongings and followed her into the room, taking seats around the table. She waited a moment for pens to be uncapped and notebooks flipped open.

“Ok gang. I know it’s the second week of the application period and this is old hat to you by now, but I just have to remind you guys of the metrics. Still here, still getting counted, still itemized in the morning email. Every week the leaderboard is going to get posted up on the front board, so don’t make me look bad. Ok, enough on that. I know you guys are gonna kick ass. I have the training in Queens this afternoon, so if you need me, I’ll have the work cell on me, shoot me a text. Otherwise, as always, Perry is your one stop shop. And speaking of Perry, guys, please fold the event tablecloths neatly before you hand them back in. I know we work in early childhood, but you’re giving Perry conniptions giving her a rolled lump of cloth in a bag. C’mon.”

She checked her notepad. “Oh, right. There’s an optional training conference call at 1, and if you haven’t been through this cycle before, I’d suggest doing it. There’s a lot of new information with Head Start and the Administration for Children’s Services, and you will be using it every day for the next few months while speaking with parents. Need a recap, dial in at 1. The number should also be in the morning email. Ok. Any questions for me before I skedaddle?”

She took a few inquiries from her team and closed out the meeting. Returning to her desk, she made sure to grab the usb with her presentation on it and toss it into her bag. Adding her notebook, pen, various phone cords and slinging her headphones around her neck, she grabbed her jacket, slipped her phone in a pocket and headed toward the door.

“Carmilla! Carmilla!” She could hear Perry calling out and stopped, feet short of the door.

“I don’t have a lot of time here, Per, gotta get to Astoria.”

“I know that, I just wanted to give you the contact information for the director, she called and said she might be running late and you may beat her there.” She handed over the neon pink sticky note with a name and number scribbled on it in Perry’s quick, precise script. Carmilla stuffed it in the chest pocket of her jacket.

“I’m gonna beat her to her own school?” That bodes well, she thought, and couldn’t stop curling her lip up.

“Don’t you think about it, Carmilla Karnstein. Ms. Hollis sounds like a perfectly wonderful human being. You’re becoming too much a jaded New Yorker already.”

“Yeah, yeah, Per. I’ll play nice.”

“You’d better, Carmilla.”

—

She sat down on the uptown W train and set her Spotify playlist to shuffle. Opening her latest ebook, she settled in for the ride. She loved this part of her job, visiting future schools and helping them prepare for the process of applying to become part of the city’s early education programs. She loved seeing all the different ways the communities thought of school, and the inventive ways they found to interact with their tiny students. Today’s school was only a year old, but the community had been actively involved in getting it opened and the director was supposed to be some early childhood wunderkind.

Who apparently couldn’t wear a watch.

Carmilla remembered Perry’s words and tried not to be that high on her horse, she knew how unpredictable the trains could be, but that’s why she always left at least 30 min before transit said she should. A lot of her job required showing up in support of people far more important than her, and punctuality had become her strident work default. Couldn’t always control the elected being on time, but she sure would be. On time was late, and early was on time. Oh look, now she was accidentally quoting her mother. Great. _One thing the woman would actually approve of_ , she thought with disgust.

Looking up from her novel, she noted her stop was next, and mentally shuffled herself back into work mode. Cracking her neck, she looked at her phone screen and skipped a few songs until she found the right one for her mood.

Carmilla left the station and headed the short few blocks to the school, her oxford leather boots making small sounds against the sidewalk.

The school looked inviting from the outside, large front windows showing a painted on mural of a forest scene, butterflies, deer and an owl scattered across it. She approached the front door, tucked her headphones into her pocket and pressed the buzzer.

“Littlest Scholars. How can I help you today?”

“Hi, yes. My name is Carmilla Karnstein, I have a meeting with Director Hollis at 12:30.”

The door buzzed and Carmilla entered. Ahead of her was a young woman behind a circular desk, presumably the voice behind the speaker.

“Ms. Hollis isn’t in yet, but feel free to take a seat. Would you like some water?” The woman smiled at her.

“No, but thank you. I’ll just wait.”

Carmilla checked her watch. 12:10. She took a seat against the wall and pulled out her notebook, making small edits to her continually worked on screenplay.

She wrote in silence, the woman at the desk’s voice a murmur as she answered the phone and went about her day.

Carmilla had been working on her piece for a few months, finding herself finally in a space beyond her train wreck of a relationship that she felt enough of herself again to begin creating something. She tried not to put too much pressure on her brain to write something amazing out of the gate, but so far, she was pleasantly surprised her writing muscles, though malnourished, hadn’t completely left her.

She heard the door buzz and open and then a tiny angry blur of honey hair marched past her, wildly gesticulating with a coffee cup.

“Can you believe this, Amelia? I’m covered in coffee!” She slammed the coffee cup down on Amelia’s desk and pulled at the buttons on her coffee-drenched, very fitted dress shirt and began to pull it out of the waist of her pencil skirt.

“Stupid delivery guy said he didn’t see me. Well of course you didn’t, you’re an Ent! Just walking willy nilly around the corner like he’s in a forest. Now I have that damned meeting and who was he gonna see with that big package-“

The speaker had suddenly noticed Carmilla as she began to strip off her shirt, looking up at the blonde with a rather surprised expression. The newcomer’s jaw snapped shut audibly and she went red to her roots.

“Uh. Hem. Hi. I’ll be right with you.” With a quick turn, the mystery girl fled down the hallway and disappeared behind a door.

Carmilla wasn’t sure how to process what she had just seen.

“Am I to assume that was the Director?” Carmilla quirked an eyebrow.

Amelia laughed and tossed the offending coffee cup in the recycling bin. “That was our beloved Ms. Hollis for sure. Hell of an educator, but killer on dry cleaning.”

Carmilla chuckled and they sat in silence for a few moments.

Amelia’s phone buzzed and she answered it quietly. Getting Carmilla’s attention, she spoke.

“I think if you head down to room 111, she should be ready to speak with you now,” Amelia pointed down the same hallway the director had escaped.

The raven haired girl picked up her backpack, slipped her notebook inside and followed the path of the assistant’s finger. Reaching room 111, she knocked lightly on the frosted glass door. She could see the Director vaguely inside, making wild waving hand gestures which froze as she heard Carmilla’s knock. The shadow dove for what could only be the chair of a desk and Carmilla heard a loud metallic squeak before there was a moment of organized silence.

“Come in.”

Carmilla pushed open the door and found Director Hollis, short one button down shirt, sitting as composed as she could be in her lace edged camisole behind her desk, the offending coffee drenched garment hung to dry by the window.

Carmilla hadn’t quite looked at the girl yet, and as their eyes met, she felt a tug in her chest that made her frown unexpectedly, the gold speckled brown eyes meeting her own with no guile, and barely a trace of embarrassment.

“Ahem. You must be Carmilla Karnstein. I’m Laura Hollis, the Director here at Littlest Scholars.”

Director Hollis stood up and moved from around her desk, holding her hand out to Carmilla. Carmilla prided herself on being very professional in her dealings with school staff and anyone in her work world, but this girl and her camisole and tigers’ eyes threw her and she wasn’t sure why.

She reached out to shake the girl’s hand, surprised by the firmness of her grip and the laser eye contact she was held in. She was a little bit taller than the other girl, and fully clothed, but with the intense way the Director looked at her, all business, any sense of advantage dissipated instantly. So vastly different from the wildly animated cartoon character that had blown into the school a few minutes before.

The Director gestured to the chair across from her desk and returned to her own seat.

Carmilla sat down and cleared her throat. “Thank you for taking the time to meet with me, Director Hollis. I know you must be quite busy with the application period happening, this should only take an hour. Then you’re free of me until the first group applicant meeting in two weeks.”

The other girl nodded and gave her a smile.

“I think, at this point, you can call me Laura. I’d say we’re a bit beyond titles.” She smiled again at Carmilla, gesturing toward the shirt hanging up in the window to her left with her eyes and that same strange tug pulled at the raven haired girl’s chest.

“Uh, sure, Director. Err. Hollis. I mean, Laura.”

The shorter girl laughed. “Well, we got there, didn’t we?”

Carmilla could kick herself. Why did she feel like she was suddenly 9 again, getting called to the Principal’s office for kissing Penelope Reed on the swings?

She mentally shook herself. She was here to do a training. As a professional. Which she was. She was not going to get distracted by this confusing alluring creature in front of her. Nope.

Not gonna.

Carmilla realized it had been a few seconds and Laura was looking at her expectantly.

“Sorry. Right. Am I giving this training to just you or will any of your staff be joining us? We find often that schools with the best applications have multiple staff working on the proposal.”

Laura smiled. “It will just be the two of us today.” She held up a pen and a notepad. “I am fully prepared to take intensely detailed notes.”

Carmilla couldn’t help but grin.

“Alright then, let’s get started.”

For the next forty-five minutes Carmilla walked Laura through the proposal process, dates and deadlines to be aware of, support networks, a breakdown of each section of the proposal and helped to start Laura in thinking of how she best wanted to represent her school with her supporting documentation.

“Ok, so there’s one more part and then you’ll be all set for today. I just need you to take over the keyboard and I’ll help you set up your account on the dedicated site.”

Carmilla closed out her PowerPoint and opened a browser on Laura’s desktop. Typing in the website address, she felt, rather than saw, Laura roll her chair closer to the desk. While they had rearranged themselves so Carmilla could run her presentation on the Director’s computer, they had been professionally quite apart. With Laura getting close enough to use the keyboard, she could actually smell the girl, something like honeysuckle, coconut and a sweetness Carmilla realized was just _Laura_.

She crouched to pull her usb from the tower on the floor, and turning back to Laura, realized she was on the same level as the girl and way too close, Laura having wheeled her chair right up to the desk as Carmilla moved.

Darting her eyes up and thanking her stars that the girl hadn’t seemed to notice, Laura’s gaze on the screen in front of her, Carmilla let out the breath she was holding after quickly standing back up and moving a respectable distance away.

_Snap out of it Karnstein!_

“Ok, so all you’re going to need to do here is fill in the prompts to create your profile and complete the account set up. Some of the forms you showed me earlier will be helpful in answering the questions in part two. It’s a little thorough, but this profile can be used to apply for grants across the city. So make sure you answer any of the questions with that in mind. While you’re doing our proposal right now, there are contracts for services your school might want to provide from other city agencies. I’ll show you the search engine after you finish this bit. I know all of this is pretty dry, but I hope I haven’t put you to sleep yet.”

Carmilla felt suddenly vulnerable when Laura’s eyes flicked up to hers from one of the questions she’d been answering.

“No, I think this was a rather nice way to recuperate from a sudden coffee downpour.”

She smiled at Carmilla.

The raven haired girl felt the edges of her lips twitch up uncontrollably.

“Oh.”

Laura had already turned back to her computer screen, but Carmilla grinned at the back of her head anyway.

“You mentioned someone was helping you write the proposal. Would you like me to send the resource email to them as well?”

“Oh that would be great. Yeah, LaF is helping me.”

“Laugh?”

“Sorry. LaFontaine. LaF. They are the other half of Littlest Scholars. I’ll give you their email.”

“Other half?” It’s out of Carmilla’s mouth before she can stop herself.

Laura gives her a perhaps too shrewd look for just a second, before it’s replaced with a smile.

“Not like that. LaF’s my best friend and handles the STEM side of our curriculum.”

“That’s really awesome. I heard you guys have a Pre-K sized science lab. Is that true?”

Laura immediately brightened. “Oh it’s so cool! These short little tables and short little stools. Obviously there aren’t any Bunsen burners because, well, they’re four, but it’s got everything else! Every Thursday we all do a science experiment. Yesterday we made Oobleck. It got everywhere but it was so much fun!”

Carmilla watched the girl speak about her school and was utterly entranced.

“If you want I can give you a tour after this, I have nothing in my schedule until 2:30.”

“I’d really like that.” Carmilla gave Laura her first true full smile of the afternoon and watched as the other girl’s own smile grew.

“Great.”

Laura turned back to the computer and grabbing a form in front of her, continued filling out the profile.

—

They both jumped at a knock on the door as Laura logged out of the site.

Amelia poked her head in.

“Hey Director, I grabbed your emergency shirt from the laundromat.”

“Oh wow. Thank you. That was great of you, Amelia.” Laura came around her desk and took the shirt from her assistant, who ducked back out the door.

“Would you mind turn-“

“I could lea-“

They smiled at each other. Carmilla nodded and turned her back.

“This will only take a second and then we can take the tour.”

Carmilla looked over the items in the office as she tried not to listen to the girl behind her, especially not when she heard the zipper of a certain pencil skirt being adjusted. She studied the shelves and reminded herself how very at work she was.

“That’s better. You can turn back now.” Laura moved to her desk as Carmilla gathered her bag together.

She glanced at the girl as she slung the bag over her shoulder, Laura now wearing a white and black accented shirt that perfectly matched the subtle houndstooth skirt. She looked incredible.

“Shall we?” Laura met her glance and Carmilla tried her hardest to affect a casual air.

“Yes ma’am.”

“Ma’am?” Laura raised her eyebrows.

“Sorry.”

Laura narrowed her eyes at Carmilla but quirked her lips into a playful half smile.

“Hm.”

She held Carmilla’s eyes a moment longer before opening her office door and moving into the hallway.

Carmilla hastened to follow the girl.

-

They rounded the last hallway, coming back to the main entrance. Carmilla had listened raptly as Laura had pointed out every facet of the school she clearly loved and had put a quite noticeable effort into creating. All of the students she saw were happy and engaged, the colorful rooms and adept teachers moving through their students showing how closely Laura paid attention to the curriculum her students were enjoying. The science lab had been just as awesome as Laura described, and now Carmilla held a small jar of green food coloring tinged oobleck in her hand, her own to take home. Her heart had definitely grown three sizes when Laura had gifted it to her.

They had fallen into a comfortable conversation the last few minutes and Carmilla knew she didn’t want it to end.

“Well, that’s the whole thing. Too bad LaF was at lunch, I would have introduced you. So. What do you think? Are we good enough for the big important Department of Education?” She grinned at Carmilla.

“Well, in my official capacity I cannot be bribed or influenced to recommend schools for contracts, that would be a massive breach of ethics,” she shot Laura a faux intimidating look, and then leaned toward the girl, conspiratorially, and Laura mirrored her.

“But me? Carmilla? Totally impressed.” She grinned at the Director.

“So I couldn’t, say, pay you to help me perfect my proposal then?” Laura leaned closer and waggled her eyebrows at Carmilla.

“Director Hollis, that would be an absolute ethics breach. I could never!” Carmilla said, jokingly outraged.

“That’s too bad, I’m pretty persuasive.”

Carmilla raised an eyebrow at the girl, who just smiled and shrugged the smallest teasing shrug.

“Well then, Director Hollis, let me take my leave before you corrupt me.”

It was the blonde’s turn to start at Carmilla’s words, but she recovered quickly.

“That would be terrible.”

“Awful.” Carmilla teased back.

“Hm. Well. I should release you then.”

_Should you?_

“I suppose. You will be forced to see me in two weeks though, so...”

“Hm. So I will, so I will.” Laura looked at her a moment in a way Carmilla couldn’t place and then squared her shoulders and held out her hand. “Thank you for the training Ms. Karnstein, it was rather educational.”

Carmilla reached out and took the girl’s hand, again marveling at the softness of the skin, but the muscle in her grip. She met Laura’s tiger eyes and smiled.

“It was very nice to meet you, Director Hollis.”

Laura released her hand and smiled at Carmilla.

“I’ll see you soon.”

With that, the Director turned on her heel and Carmilla watched her disappear back down the hallway. She couldn’t help but stare a little, there was no doubt the girl had made an impression on her and she had eyes, the form moving away from her was controlled by a confident person, a gorgeous person, bordering on and diving into downright sexy, person. It wasn’t her fault she was such a sucker for a mind at work. And pencil skirts.

She twitched though, for as Laura reached the door of her office, she paused and looked back at Carmilla, seemingly unsurprised that the girl was still standing there, quirked one side of her mouth up in a smile that may have been knowing, and disappeared through the doorframe.

Carmilla curled her hand around the perfectly sized specimen jar in her pocket, grinned to herself & pushed her way out of the school and into the sunshine.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Carmilla gets dragged to a political function by Mattie and the night goes differently than planned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sadly Carmilla’s job doesn’t actually exist, it’s pieces of about 4 different jobs, but all the work she does, does happen. 
> 
> Thanks for reading!

Noise and general organized chaos greeted Carmilla as she swiped her key card and walked into her office.

Her team, which had quite a few different responsibilities, shared a larger space with the Early Childhood outreach team, and as it was application season, most were glued to their phones, taking information from parents and typing diligently in their school choices to the application server. Languages and voices overlapped, and it made her happy.

She had grown up in a tiny town in the middle of nowhere, where most other languages were never heard from present lips & the fact that she could pick out at least six from her coworkers brought her joy. She was working somewhere that valued all of the community, and chose to support them fully, communicating in twelve official languages in house and any else their translation line could handle.

Tossing her bag under her desk, she greeted her team and booted her computer back up. She checked her emails and saw one flagged from her Department Chair a few minutes before.

Picking up the phone, she dialed her number and waited to be connected. Mel was a decent boss, she very much enjoyed her hands-off approach to Carmilla’s team.

“Hey Callis, we have a closure?”

—

“Guys, rally up on me! We’ve got a heavy lift we need to turn around fast!”

Explaining to her team that a school had been closed unexpectedly due to a faulty water pipe that had failed, she quickly sent them the student listing and within five minutes her team was calling through the roster, finding temporary school accommodations for the displaced students for however long it would be while their school completed the repairs. She loved her team, a well oiled machine she had built from scratch, choosing each member for their different skills.

Carmilla was 27 and proudly found herself the Outreach Director of Special Projects for the Early Childhood Division of the New York City Department of Education. Was a damn mouthful, but that’s why they used tiny type on the business cards. She had gotten there through being scrappy, grit and strength of will. She knew she would always have some white privilege to confront, especially in city government, but no one in her office could say Carmilla Karnstein didn’t buckle down and take names from sunup to sundown when her team and city needed her.

The random obstacles and push/pull of the job was what drew her to it, initially. She liked the unpredictable nature of it, while still having the campaign structure running beneath to keep her steady. While it was much different work than her political organizing days, the set up was the same, the goals just different. She was tasked with reaching as many families as she could to disseminate and educate them about their educational opportunities. Worked a lot better when she was contacting a family during dinner to offer them school, rather than pester them to vote for a candidate.

The raven haired girl checked her team’s spreadsheet, noting that 20 of the 36 parents had been contacted positively and that was a good sign. Some parents were hard to hunt down unannounced, and she wanted to make sure all of them had somewhere to attend on Monday before she walked out of the office.

Returning an email to Mel to update her about the school closure calls, Carmilla ran a hand through her hair and blew out a sigh.

“Penny for your thoughts?”

Carmilla looked up at Mattie, leaning on her cubicle wall, and smiled.

“Ah, my favorite Mayoral appointee. She doth grace us with her presence. Or something.”

“Darling, you butcher the English language, but I still love you anyway.”

“Well you’d have to, sis, or I might let slip how squishy you actually are on the inside.”

Mattie faked insult. “You crush me, you wicked creature of the night. You wouldn’t dare.”

“I’ll let it slide. What can I do for the Mayor’s Community Affairs Unit Director?”

Mattie gave Carmilla the look. She knew that look. That look meant that for several hours she was going to be standing around at some function tonight, bored out of her mind.

“Mattie, no. I went to the one last week.”

“That was for the Comptroller. Tonight it’s the Mayor. At the Armory. Come on sis, you love a good nibble plate. Besides. You know I hate it when you use the full title.”

Carmilla let her head fall back against her chair and gave Mattie her third toughest glare, and then ruined it by sticking out her tongue.

“You are a horrible sibling.”

“I know, darling. Ta!”

—

Carmilla slipped her jacket on and was momentarily confused by the lump in her pocket. She pulled out the jar of oobleck and smiled. She had been so deep in her work the rest of the day, she had completely pushed the training to the back of her mind.

She held the container up and tilted it, watching the sluggish goo refuse the path of gravity. She was still very not sure how to categorize what had happened between her and the Director. Her and Ms. Hollis. Her and Laura.

She knew the big blatant rules, the ones that said city employees couldn’t help applicants, but she wasn’t interested in breaking those to influence Lau- Director Hollis’ application. She was much more interested in Laura, when she wasn’t the Director.

Carmilla was self aware enough to know she caught people’s eyes from time to time, and if she was being completely honest, she didn’t mind that fact, but when it came to the people she was interested in, her anxiety sometimes got the better of her and could muddle her usually impeccable judgement.

But, all the same, Carmilla didn’t think she was being ridiculous in concluding that she hadn’t been the only one showing interest.

_Right?_

—

The Armory was a decent train ride from her office, so she gave up on the thought of going home first. She looked presentable enough in her waistcoat, button down and dress pants, so thankfully she wouldn’t feel under dressed among the city’s political elite. She watched the underground go by the window of the train and counted down the stops.

Mattie did this to her far too often, beg or demand she show up at some political function. If tonight was the same, Mattie would talk to her for about three minutes at the beginning of the night and then leave Carmilla behind to staff the many people Mattie needed to make sure were enjoying the evening.

She didn’t begrudge Mattie her work duties. Matska Belmonde was the first person you wanted running your city-wide community affairs. She could hound the most ardent opponent, bring out whole communities at a moment’s notice and charm the anything off of everyone. The Mayor’s current surge in popularity was directly linked to Mattie’s promotion, the previous Director, Vordenberg, having moved on a few months earlier. Mattie had quickly thrown her office into upheaval, revamping all of their public facing protocol and creating an efficient, welcoming, die hard batch of energized people who would follow her sister off a cliff.

Carmilla was completely unsurprised, knowing her sister, but she did enjoy seeing Mattie in her element, weaving through the elite, who looked to be more staffing Mattie, than the reverse, with the attention they gave her.

—

“She arrives!”

“Hey Mattie. I made it.”

“Delightful.” She pulled Carmilla aside to one of the empty cocktail tables beyond the door.

“So there’s this hotshot coming up out of The Bronx, aiming for the Public Advocate. Queer, Dominican. She’s going to be here tonight. You should see if she needs a Campaign Director.”

Carmilla groaned. “Mattie, we’ve gone over this. I’m out of the game. I’m not working in politics again. Not unless I see the best candidate that ever lived and even then, she’d have to be beyond reproach. I’m done getting burned by local politics.”

Mattie closed her eyes slowly before fixing Carmilla in her gaze. “Mircalla Karnstein, you could have a one legged turtle as a candidate and you would get them elected President. Find someone and run their campaign and you out of here. National stage. It’s where you belong. You’ve redefined outreach for your office, it’s time to move on. You’ve gotten too comfortable.”

She shook her head at Carmilla. “Local politics? Look where we’re standing! I can see five City Council members, a Congresswoman, one retired Supreme Court Justice and a few dozen people nearly as connected. In this room alone. And we’re early! I know Ell did more than knock the wind out of your sails, she nearly capsized your whole ship, but dear sister, you’re meant for so much better than that desk you’ve already conquered.”

Carmilla sighed and let her shoulders slump. Mattie always chose the best moments to get introspective. Not that her sister didn’t have good points, now and again. Mattie loved her fiercely, but simply could not accept that Carmilla wasn’t, and might never be, ready to work in politics again.

“Mattie, if I ever find that candidate? You bet I will be back to my black tea mainlining, VAN obsessed, turf cutting, metrics crunching vampire ways. But until then, I’m really enjoying helping to build a department that watches over a school system with a population of _over a million children_. Do you know how rewarding that is? Even if it’s not crazy paced? Even if it’s not a straight shot to the top?”

Mattie regarded her younger sister and gave a small nod of acquiescence. “Alright kitty cat. You’re not getting out of meeting her, but I won’t force you to recite your resume.”

“Thank you.”

“Now run along and snack, the Mayor should be here soon, and I need to get my team to make sure the seating is correct on the dais. All these last minute speaker additions, they do attempt to try my patience. I’ll find you later, sister, for the introduction.”

Mattie kissed her cheek and was gone into the growing crowd.

—

Carmilla had picked through the buffet table over 40 minutes ago and the two slices of cheese left on her tiny plate were just too sad to put out of their misery. She sighed, unfortunately while she had seen enough people she knew, there were none that she wanted to engage in a conversation with. Five various elected officials had stopped her to speak and as always she was professional and warm, but she really had no interest in building her public profile or getting lured back into that world. She had resigned herself to playing her favorite event game, “Staffer or a Donor”. It was actually not all that interesting, the two groups behaved quite differently, but it did pass the time.

She had counted 32 staffers and 19 donors when a flash of white caught her eye. She took three steps to her left and looked between two taller men across the room. Facing away from Carmilla, her hair now up in an artistically messy bun, was none other than one Director Laura Hollis.

_What was she doing here??_

—

Carmilla watched the Director from across the room. She had moved as to see the girl in profile, but didn’t want to find herself in the girl’s line of sight. She studied how Laura spoke with the two men in her conversation, how she used her hands and arms to illustrate the story she was telling. The gestures were much more reserved than the wild gesticulations of the morning, but Carmilla couldn’t help but smile as the girl was clearly enjoying telling whatever tale it was.

She watched their interaction wind down and then the Director was standing alone, studying the evening’s program.

Carmilla made her way through the crowd, keeping one eye out for anyone who would want to stop her to talk, and the other to make sure no one had approached her quarry.

Drawing close to the unaware girl, Carmilla couldn’t help but play with the Director a little. Pitching her voice a bit lower than normal, where it came out in more of a sultry rasp, she leaned in toward Laura’s shoulder from behind her.

“You know, I _really love your shirt_.”

Director Hollis jumped and whirled to the voice, a mix of surprise, anger and something else across her face which then slid into recognition.

“You?!”

Carmilla chuckled and tipped an invisible hat toward Laura.

“Me.”

Laura shook her head at Carmilla and smiled uncertainly.

“Do you always sneak up on unsuspecting prey? That voice, I didn’t expect, you sounded so-“ She seemed to catch herself.

“Prey?” Carmilla quirked an eyebrow and Laura ducked her eyes, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

“That’s not exactly-“

“Mmhm.” Carmilla murmured, using that same low voice. She watched as a shiver ran across Laura’s shoulders, before the girl straightened and looked Carmilla in the eye.

“You’re terrible.”

“I know.”

Carmilla grinned at Laura who fought the impulse and lost, scrunching up her face before giving into the smile.

Carmilla thought to herself that Laura’s scrunchy face was one of the cutest things she’d ever seen.

“So what is Astoria’s prized educator doing in the belly of the beast?”

“If you must know, it’s a belly I’m quite used to being in.”

Carmilla was thrown by that. She knew most of the players and Laura Hollis was an unknown entity.

“Really?”

“Really. Back home I was pretty involved in the local political discourse. My uncle was a Judge on the 9th Circuit, so I got my indoctrination early. I had two paths I started down, education and politics. It was a decent toss up which was going to win. But then I met LaF in graduate school, we started doing research in Early Childhood Education and decided we could do it better than what we were reading. So thus Littlest Scholars was born. New York ticked as a good city to test out our hypotheses in, so we packed up the whole thing and moved.”

She paused to take a breath. “And now that I’ve told you my life story, you have to tell me something.”

“Oh I do?” Carmilla rasped. She hadn’t meant to, but the flash of _something_ in Laura’s eyes again made the accidental drop in tone worthwhile.

“Yes, you do.”

Carmilla gestured with her hand for Laura to continue.

“We’ve been standing here for ten minutes and in that space of time I’ve watched four different people around us very clearly point you out to someone else and start talking to each other, I’d suspect about you. Why?”

Carmilla was momentarily taken aback. This girl was more shrewd and observant than she had anticipated. Now, how to answer Laura’s question. She wanted to be honest with Laura, but what was the sum of her work the last ten years and it’s aftermath did not invite a short story.

She sighed and ran her hand through her hair, noting that Laura followed the movement with her eyes.

“I used to be the most sought after rising political campaign director in the Northeast. Then I had a candidate a few years back and it didn’t go well. I had to step away from politics, completely, but a lot of folks remember and keep trying to drag me back in. Those that think they know the truth of what happened tend to like to talk about it. Was a pretty juicy story for the local papers for a while.” She said it without much emotion, attempting to distance her present self verbally from a time she wanted to both forget, and knew was seared into her personhood permanently.

“How old are you?”

The question and it’s innocence threw Carmilla out of her mental hamster wheel.

“What?”

“You can’t be that much older or younger than I am, so I’m just trying to figure out if you were still wearing Underoos on your first campaign.”

Carmilla’s eyes flashed to Laura’s only to see the girl had a soft teasing look on her face.

“Ok, Hollis, a point to you. It was Wonder Woman short pants, not Underoos, but I do appreciate that you understand I’ve always been in charge.” She looked at Laura with a challenging, but mirthful expression.

Laura returned her challenge with emphasis and lifted an eyebrow.

“You really make a girl want to-“

“Carmilla Karnstein, there you are, finally! I have someone you just absolutely need to meet!”

Mattie. With the _worst_ timing ever.

She tried to look unconcerned as Mattie swept in with her charge.

“Who is this delightful creature I’ve found you with, sister?”

“Mattie, may I introduce Director Laura Hollis, of Littlest Scholars, perhaps one of our future schools. Director Hollis, this is my sister, Matska Belmonde, Director of the Mayor’s Community Affairs Unit. And-“

Mattie intervened. “Elizabeth Lorenzo, Bronx District Leader and maybe more, if we can just convince her to run!”

They all shook hands and exchanged pleasantries.

“Well I should leave you to your conversation,” Laura stated, starting to put distance between Carmilla and herself she hadn’t realized was lacking previously.

“No, Laur-“

“That is quite kind of you, Director Hollis. I promised Ms. Lorenzo I’d introduce her to all the people she needed to know in her upward political path and that means my dear sister!”

Mattie linked her arm with Carmilla’s, effectively shutting out the honey haired girl from the conversation. Carmilla threw her what she hoped was an apologetic look over her shoulder as Mattie dragged her away, Laura’s small sad smile the last thing she saw.

—

Carmilla pulled her jacket on with frustrated movements. Mattie had kept her talking to Ms. Lorenzo for over twenty minutes and by the time she had escaped, Laura was nowhere to be seen. She had scanned the room, even doing a loop around the edge, but the girl had clearly left.

She pushed out the door and into the gentle spring night, taking a deep breath. She was thinking too fast about this, making too many assumptions. Yes, she liked talking to Laura. Yes, she found the girl utterly endearing, and had been given a rather attractive insight to her earlier this evening, but still. She had her job, she had her place. And wooing a girl who she shouldn’t be wooing, who she was assuming was even as interested back, was not the best use of her time. _Ah, but really, who was she kidding?_

She walked down the block toward the train, noticing a liquor store on the corner.

 _What the hell, today deserves a drink_ , she thought, and opened the door.

Heading down the aisle toward the whiskies, she was in her own mental world. It had been a long time since she had even been a fraction as interested in someone as she had become toward Laura in, well, the last few hours. There was clearly depth to the girl, intelligence and a generosity easily illustrated by the school she ran. She wanted to discount this as a fluke, it had been a long time since Ell, but something made her want to see what this was.

Talking with Laura made her happy in a way she hadn’t been in what felt like forever. Their conversation as they walked the school had been so comfortable, the Director taking time to really explain to her why everything was done the way it was, and what studies had concluded what, and which principles of what thing LaF had apparently come up with could change some other thing. She was curious about seeing who this LaF was, what they were like. She doubted Laura had uninteresting friends.

She still felt silly weighing the interactions as if they were a future, but after tonight she was pretty sure she’d chance it in that direction. If only Mattie hadn’t interrupted their conversation. Carmilla was really curious as to what Laura had been about to say. She could think of a few colorful answers but she suspected Laura would have surprised her.

“Why, Carmilla Karnstein, are you stalking me?”

Carmilla’s head snapped up, and there, standing by the end case was Laura, a bottle of red wine cradled in her arms, a wicked smirk across her lips.

“Uh, no?”

_Really, Karnstein, that’s the best you have?_

Laura took a couple of steps toward Carmilla, still smiling.

“Whiskey, eh? Spending time with me that horrible, you need to drink away those memories?”

Laura winked at her and leaned against the shelving.

Carmilla definitely hadn’t been reading things wrong.

“As far as I can tell, we haven’t done anything yet I’d have to decide if I wanted to remember or not, _Director Hollis_.”

“Ah, hem. Wait. Yet?” Laura visibly started, and then turned bright red. She was cute when she was flustered.

_Nice, Karnstein._

Carmilla closed the distance between her and Laura, putting just the tiniest edge to the roll of her hips. She could tell the girl noticed. When she got close enough, she tucked a strand of Laura’s hair behind her ear and reveled in how soft it was.

“I see I wasn’t the only one looking for a little after work company.”

Laura looked down at the bottle as if she had forgotten she was holding it.

“Wine. Nothing scandalous there. Just wine.”

“Hmm.” Carmilla let the sultry sound rumble in her chest a little bit longer than necessary and watched as Laura’s jaw tightened. The shorter girl’s gaze lingered on Carmilla’s lips and then traveled up her face. She tilted her head and looked at Carmilla, seemingly making an internal decision.

When Laura spoke, her voice was suddenly velvet and Carmilla felt it to her bones.

“Where were you and that bottle of whiskey headed?”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Takes off right from where they left us. Carmilla gets honest, Laura’s a top w a capital T and the rest, well...

  
Carmilla leaned back against the edge of the roof and looked at the girl next to her, taking in the view.

“Wow, you really can see the whole skyline! This is incredible, Carmilla.”

They were standing on the roof of Carmilla’s building in northern Queens, looking back toward Manhattan. The six story building sat on what was the closest thing to what the neighborhood could call a hill, and it was just enough elevation to see the whole of Manhattan Island, One World Trade to Harlem.

The lights of the skyscrapers twinkled through the night sky and Carmilla marveled watching the girl take it all in. The Empire State Building was green tonight, and stood out against the less colorful buildings.

Laura tipped her wine to her lips, using her other hand to support the half full bottle. Carmilla watched the girl take a few mouthfuls and fidgeted with her own whiskey.

Setting the bottle down on the roof edge, she turned to Carmilla.

“Seems like I’m the only one drinking here. Bottoms up, Karnstein.”

She smirked at the other girl and raised her eyebrows in challenge.

“Why Director Hollis, I told you earlier, I cannot be influenced! Not even with peer pressure!”

Laura snorted with laughter.

“Yeah sure, Carm.”

The raven haired girl’s heart tugged again. No one had called her Carm since, well, since Ell. It was strange to hear it from another’s tongue, but she liked the way her name sounded in Laura’s mouth. It felt safe again, not burdened with history and pain and disappointment. Laura said her name with kindness.

Laura had noticed Carmilla’s sudden silence.

“Did I say something wrong?”

Carmilla shook her head and met Laura’s eyes.

“It’s just been a very long time since someone has called me that.”

“Oh hell, I’m sorry, I didn’t meant to-“

Carmilla cut her off with a smile and a shake of her head.

“I- I like the way you say my name.” She shrugged self consciously.

Laura’s smile could have set the sun afire.

“I’ll remember that, Carm.”

They both smiled at each other.

Carmilla took a swig of her whiskey.

“Better?”

Laura grinned and turned in a slow circle, absorbing her unobstructed view of the city spread out before her, the lights of Citi Field shining bright from afar on the other side of the building.

“How long have you lived here? Did you grow up here?”

Carmilla shook her head. “No, I grew up about 300 miles that way.” She pointed vaguely north east. “I’ve lived here for a decade or so.”

Laura moved back toward Carmilla and rested against the half wall next to her. She leaned in and bumped the other girl’s shoulder with her own.

“Thank you for sharing this with me. My day really went a lot differently than I expected.” She looked up at Carmilla and gave her a small smile.

“Mine too.”

The silence between them hung comfortably.

Carmilla looked up and watched a few planes on their approach into LaGuardia, red wing lights blinking. She turned back to Laura, finding the girl had been studying her. Carmilla raised an eyebrow in question.

“So Mattie’s your sister?”

Carmilla nodded.

“Then doesn’t she know you don’t want to do politics anymore?”

Carmilla turned around and leaned her hands on the edge of the wall, kicking her toe into the gummy tar of the roof.

“It’s really complicated.”

She saw Laura nod in her periphery.

“That I definitely gathered. I don’t mean to pry, you just seemed to have a lot of pride in something you made sure to tell me in a monotone.”

Ok. There she went again with the astute insights. Carmilla glanced over to Laura and saw the girl had a small smile on her face, and was trying to clearly hold back her inquisitive nature. Carmilla appreciated that, and Laura’s effort to make her feel comfortable was definitely noted.

She leaned on her hip and faced Laura. Only option she had was to be honest. If Laura ran, she ran.

Carmilla ran a hand through her hair, sighed and spared a last glance at Laura before she began speaking.

“The candidate I told you about? Was a woman. She was the first woman in Queens to run for that district, and I was her campaign manager. Mattie had introduced us a few years earlier and she asked me when she decided to start the campaign. Everything was going well, we had a decent sized field for the primaries, we were gaining steam, but then everything went really unexpectedly nuts. The candidate and I were working late one night, and it just happened. One minute, going over canvass plans for the next day, the next minute, she’s got me pinned to a file cabinet and we’re all over each other. We hid it for months. I knew it was wrong, but it just kept happening. In a way I knew it was always going to go sideways, but I never thought so monumentally.”

She pauses to gauge Laura’s reaction so far, but the blonde only looks at her with open interest.

Taking a deep breath in, she continues.

“She won the primaries, and usually that would be the end of it, there aren’t often many good Republican challengers in Queens, but she had one, and he wasn’t going to be easy. I was working crazy hours, and we started getting stupid. The thing was, the candidate was married. To a man. And one night after a really late fundraiser, one of his friends caught us half dressed in the alley behind the catering hall. It was so stupid. We were so stupid. I was head over heels in love with her by that point and would have followed her into hell.”

She says this bitterly, the still-not-quite resolved twist in her gut present as she recites the history.

“The guy managed to get pictures before he interrupted us and sent them to Theo. Her husband. Theo, predictably, blackmailed the both of us. I was to immediately step down, of course, citing the reason of my choice, and his wife, after he made sure she won the election, was to step down after a year to focus on building her family and help him win Public Advocate that next fall. If we were ever in contact with each other again, he said he’d publish the photos and ruin us both. There were quite a few gossip column pieces that speculated pretty closely, but Theo made sure they only ever got close enough.”

Carmilla cleared her throat. “As he’s Public Advocate, and she isn’t in office, you can see what happened. I hear they have two children now. The worst part of it wasn’t that we were discovered, or that I left the campaign, it’s that I lost the woman I had fallen so crazily for. She made me believe in what I was doing so wholeheartedly because she believed. She wanted so badly to change the world and it was infectious. I couldn’t help to want to move the world for her. She was so driven and passionate. Having to give up the two things that gave me the most happiness in my life in order to make sure they both didn’t come crashing down broke me. I left politics completely in that moment. Lobbied really hard for the job at the DOE, though no one understood why, and buried myself in building the department so I didn’t have to think about any of it. I do love my job, but it wasn’t where I was headed.”

She stopped talking, took in and let out a huge breath and looked out toward the skyline. She hadn’t anticipated telling Laura the whole truth, but there it was. Now all she could do was wait to see what happened.

“Well that deserves a drink,” Laura said, with a quirk of her lips, and handed Carmilla the whiskey.

Carmilla shot her a thankful look and took a sip, and then a gulp. Then another. And a third.

“Can I ask you a few questions?”

Carmilla wiped her mouth with the back of her hand and set the bottle back down.

“I...suppose so?” _She’s still here, so that’s a good sign, right?_

“Did you go into that campaign intending to seduce her?”

“What? No!” Carmilla shook her head strongly. “I wouldn’t ever.”

Laura nodded.

“Was there anyone you could have told about what Theo was doing?”

“Not without risking the candidate.” She still couldn’t say Ell’s name, not in front of Laura. There had to be something still, just for her.

“So you just happened to fall in love with a married woman and conduct an affair, while running her campaign for City Council, in one of the most historically politically corrupt cities in the world?”

“Uh, yes?” Carmilla could only shrug self consciously.

Laura looked bewildered and that _something else_ again.

“Why did you tell me that? You met me this morning and literally just told me the plot of a queer Scorsese movie, which is apparently your life. I mean what Theo did was illegal, so very very illegal, and yet you just told me. Like it was no big deal. Like it was just what it was. But moments before your eyes were on fire telling me of the campaign. So _very_ interesting.”

Carmilla turned back to the girl, something in the shift of her tone making her want to search out eye contact. Laura was looking at her far too closely, as if she was scrutinizing Carmilla’s soul somehow. It made her a little nervous, and a bit turned on, if she was being honest. As if Laura could take her vulnerability before she’d demanded it. And Carmilla wanted to give it.

“There’s something about you, Karnstein. It sounds like a cliche movie line, but there it is. You’re the most intriguing person I’ve met since I moved here and I don’t usually go from a professional meeting to a rooftop twelve hours later. You make me want to dare to find out why I did today, Gotham City back story and all.”

Laura reached up and ran her thumb gently along Carmilla’s jawline before putting soft pressure underneath the taller girl’s downward tipped chin and drawing her into a kiss.

Their lips met softly, teasingly. They gave and took from each other, both girls melting together, Carmilla leaning into Laura and pressing the length of her body against the smaller girl, gently pinning her to the low wall. Laura moved her hand around to cup the back of Carmilla’s head and pulled her deeper into the kiss, parting her lips and running the tip of her tongue along Carmilla’s top lip, which was answered eagerly, a flash of heat running straight through each body as their tongues met.

Carmilla could taste Laura’s wine, the bitter red adding to the very heady feeling of Laura’s tongue sliding along the length of her own, pulling back to tease the underside before darting to run along the inside of her lip.

Carmilla’s hands moved to frame Laura’s hips, her thumbs caressing, while Laura’s fingers tangled in Carmilla’s hair. They both enjoyed the sensation of tasting each other, learning what pressure, what tease elicited what reaction.

Then Carmilla bit Laura’s bottom lip harder than she meant to and was rewarded with a surprised but throaty moan that went straight to Carmilla’s clit. She nipped at the lip before she let it go and Laura tightened her right hand in Carmilla’s hair before her left slid down and wrapped lightly around Carmilla’s slender neck.

The taller girl gasped into Laura’s mouth as a burst of heat exploded inside her at the unexpected show of control. She couldn’t stop herself from pressing harder into Laura’s hand, the blonde growling in response.

Their mouths grew more insistent, the energy between them growing deeper and more electric. Carmilla could feel herself coming undone against Laura’s demanding and unfettered mouth. Laura’s right hand still had a commanding grip in her hair and the line of pleasure and pain it provided was making her knees weak. She broke the kiss for air, leaning her forehead against the other girl’s and panted out unsteady breaths. No one had made her feel this way before, not even _her_.

Laura stroked her fingers down Carmilla’s neck, her voice coming out rough and unfocused, her hand stopping to rest against the taller girl’s collarbone.

“Mmm. That was a good decision.”

Carmilla rasped out a chuckle against the girl’s skin.

“So, I’ve seen the roof, you want to show me your bed?” Laura leaned forward and nipped at Carmilla’s throat.

The taller girl moaned and nodded vigorously, Laura chuckled darkly and sucked at Carmilla’s pulse point.

“Lead the way.”

Carmilla took Laura’s hand and almost dragged her, laughing, to the stairwell, their half empty bottles left forgotten.

—

Carmilla’s back slammed against the inside of her apartment door and the air was driven from her lungs. She had barely enough time to gasp any in before Laura’s mouth was feverishly upon her own again, claiming her skin in a way that lit Carmilla on fire. The girl was everywhere, teasing Carmilla’s tongue with her own, one hand gripping Carmilla’s hair at the back of her head, the other clamped to her ass, pulling Carmilla against her.

She didn’t know what to process first, but the decision was made for her as Laura tugged her hair, tilted her neck back and latched her lips to Carmilla’s pulse point, causing the girl to lose herself in a moan. Her hands flew up to tangle in Laura’s hair, her bun long since pulled loose, messy strands falling in a way Carmilla thought was the sexiest thing she’d ever seen.

She pushed off of the door and flipped them around, her hands moving to roam the blonde’s ass. She nibbled on Laura’s ear and was rewarded with a shudder.

“I couldn’t take my eyes off you in this skirt.” She spoke the words against the skin of Laura’s neck, placing hot kisses down to her collarbone.

Laura moaned and ran her hands underneath Carmilla’s untucked shirt and drew her nails down the girl’s back.

“I know.”

Carmilla hissed at the white heat of Laura’s nails and needed more. She started unbuttoning her own shirt, needing more skin, more contact. Tossing it behind her, she shrugged out of her bra and turned back to Laura.

The shorter girl was staring at her hungrily, her eyes unabashedly roaming Carmilla’s torso.

“Fuck, you look-” She reached for Carmilla and ducked her head, a hot set of lips attaching themselves to Carmilla’s left nipple and she arched into the touch, Laura’s tongue flicking the sensitive nub back and forth, her arms wrapping around Carmilla’s waist and holding her tight. Laura switched nipples and the twin sensation of the cold air and hot mouth made Carmilla’s head fall back and she moaned loudly.

“Oh fuck Laura.” She brought her hands up and held the blonde’s head to her chest, each swipe of Laura’s tongue sending sparks of fire through her body. Laura switched to licking whole stripes of Carmilla’s skin, her breasts, the valley in between and up to her neck. The taller girl let out one continuous low moan, Laura’s tongue like wet heat, her arousal following the path the blonde’s tongue took.

Laura murmured something into the skin under her jaw but Carmilla was too lost in her lust to catch it.

“Hmm wha?”

“I said you taste delicious but I want to taste the rest of you.” Carmilla groaned at her words.

Laura’s hands went to Carmilla’s pants but the girl put her own hands on top of Laura’s to stop her.

“Me first. You have no idea what this skirt does to me.”

Laura smirked.

She ran her hands along Laura’s shoulders, down her arms to her wrists. She took Laura’s right wrist into her hands and unbuttoned the sleeve of her shirt, and did the same with her left. Caressing the girl’s neck, she reached for the top button of the girl’s blouse and undid it, slowly following down the line, revealing the chemise. She gently pulled the blouse out of the skirt, slipped it off Laura’s shoulders and tossed it in the direction of her desk, where it fell into an untidy pile.

Turning back to Laura, she took in the rise and fall of the girl’s chest, the flush along her neck, the outline of her hard nipples through the camisole. She leaned forward and licked the right one through the material, the silky cloth sliding across the bit of flesh. Unprepared, Laura let out a sharp groan and spoke between clenched teeth.

“You do that again and you won’t get a chance to take this damn skirt off.” Chastened, Carmilla moved to the hem of the chemise.

She raised her arms and let Carmilla slip off the layer, and it landed somewhere near her shirt.

Carmilla hummed and moved to kneel in front of Laura, her hands sliding down to rest on the girl’s thighs. She slid her arms around Laura’s ass and squeezed, before finding the zipper of the skirt and drawing it down. She slipped her fingers into the waist of the skirt and slowly, terribly slowly, revealed Laura to herself, until the girl stood in nothing but her thin lace bra and matching lace thong.

Carmilla was beyond herself with desire toward the tiny Amazon standing in front of her. Her eyes raked over Laura’s body, the toned legs, lickably muscled stomach and powerful arms. She could feel herself responding, the low pull in her belly growing stronger.

Laura looked down at the panting, lusting girl before her and couldn’t help but torture the poor creature a little further. She leaned her shoulder blades back against the door and spread her now skirtless legs, running her hands up from her hips, following every groove of her stomach, before cupping her own breasts, shrugging out of her bra and very slowly, too slowly, letting the undergarment fall. She watched Carmilla’s mouth widen as she took her own nipples in her fingers and began to roll them, her hips twitching. The girl on the floor moaned and started to reach for Laura.

“No.”

Carmilla stopped her movements, arms outstretched, not understanding.

“Watch.”

Carmilla lowered her hands immediately and stilled.

“ _Good girl_.”

Carmilla’s eyelids fluttered at the praise. How did this girl, really, this stranger, know how to break her down like this? Know what hidden things turned Carmilla inside out? It was agonizing and she only wanted more.

Laura continued to touch herself, rolling her hips forward toward the girl.

“You want to touch so badly, don’t you?”

Carmilla nodded violently, eyes glued to Laura’s fingers.

“Mm I bet you do. I bet you want to run your hands over this skin.” She left her nipples behind and flattened her palms below her breasts, slowly sliding them down her abs toward the edge of her lace underwear. She dipped the tips of her fingers under the edge of the fabric and watched as a full body shudder went through Carmilla.

“Mm, my good girl wants a taste, doesn’t she?”

Carmilla could only moan in response and continue nodding, her whole body attuned to the few hidden inches of skin between Laura’s fingertips and where Carmilla wanted so badly to bury her face.

“I’m sure we can do something about that.”

She straightened up and took one step toward Carmilla, who was too afraid to move, lest this unbelievable moment be broken.

Laura slipped her thumbs into her thong and started to slide the garment down her hips. She wasn’t done teasing the girl though, and just as the fabric passed the hint of hair above her mound, she spun on her toes away from the girl, bending all the way over at the waist and letting Carmilla watch as the material slipped over and off her perfectly curved ass. She couldn’t hide how absolutely turned on she was as well, Carmilla’s guttural moan a confirmation that the wetness she felt dripping from her cunt had indeed soaked the material of her thong, the hint of skin underneath already a drenched mess.

Carmilla couldn’t believe what she was seeing, the skin bared before her creating a hunger in the girl she’d never felt before, like in this moment she was learning what she was made for. Oh to be a vampire with the power to mark that skin, she thought fleetingly, before she noticed the thin filament of arousal still connecting Laura’s thong to her pussy as it was dragged down her thighs and she wished beyond anything she could reach forward and lick the liquid into her mouth.

Laura stepped out of the thong and turned back to the girl. Carmilla was absolutely hers in the moment and they both knew it.

“Open your mouth.”

Carmilla did as was asked and Laura surprised the girl by balling up the thong and pushing it into her mouth. The fabric was at first scratchy, but then the taste and smell of Laura’s cunt hit her full force and she snapped her mouth shut, desperately trying to suck the girl’s juices out of the fabric. She was a complete mess, shaking with want of this unpredictable goddess in front of her, so turned on and with no idea where anything was going.

Laura’s lips curled up darkly.

“Mmm. I thought so, so eager you are.”

Carmilla let out a shuddering breath around the fabric and looked up pleadingly at Laura. How did this girl exist, standing so confident and so naked in front of her, wicked glint in her eyes?

Laura caressed Carmilla’s face and the girl leaned into the touch, eyes fluttering closed.

“Good girls get rewarded, don’t they?”

Carmilla looked up at her with quizzical lust filled eyes. She could only hope they did and that Laura decided she counted as one.

Laura tucked a piece of Carmilla’s hair behind her ear and then slid her hand around to cradle the back of the girl’s skull.

“No moving. No opening your mouth. This is about what I want. About me using your body for my pleasure. You understand?” Carmilla could only nod feverishly, ready to give whatever the girl wanted to take from her.

Laura groaned at the girl’s instantaneous submission and put pressure on Carmilla’s skull, drawing the girl closer to her pussy, Carmilla’s nostrils flaring as she tried to inhale as much of the blonde’s scent as possible.

She pressed the girl’s face against her, arousal soaked flesh sliding against the soft skin of Carmilla’s lips. She could feel Carmilla almost vibrating, trying so hard to follow her orders. She knew she couldn’t push the girl too much farther, not right now, but Laura was losing herself in the role, sinking back into part of her personality she had to most often leave behind. Carmilla brought it out of her, in a way no one had in years. She yearned for the girl, burned to explore who and what she was, so tough yet so vulnerable, and so absolutely beautiful while she knelt before Laura, pale limbs shaking with need, big eyes focused on wherever Laura wanted to lead her.

Laura slowly rolled her hips, her clit sliding a path from Carmilla’s chin up to her nose, and back down again. The girl tightened her lips, creating a ridge over which Laura rubbed her pussy, soaking Carmilla’s chin as she ground out her desire on the girl’s face. She was so wet, and it was all the fault of this raven haired beauty underneath her.

“Mmm fuck Carm, I’ve wanted to do this to your pretty little lips since you walked into my office.” Laura arched her back, pulling harder on Carmilla’s head.

Carmilla was both absolutely shocked and entirely controlled by her desires. She’d never been made to feel this way, her voice cut off by the material she still had clamped in her mouth, her nose drowning happily in the smell of Laura, her face a wet mess. She could only moan loudly around the fabric, feeling the vibrations sink into Laura’s skin as the girl above her sucked in a quick breath, her hips stuttering.

“Oh hell, baby.” The sound from above her was growled out.

It utterly threw Carmilla to be on her knees, the most beautiful woman she’d ever seen now using her face to get herself off. It was so completely different, so dirty, but as she opened her eyes and saw Laura, her head thrown back and moaning, her free hand twisting a nipple, sheen of sweat begging to be licked off her abs, Carmilla knew she was where she was supposed to be. Beneath this stunning creature, captive to her desires and needs. She didn’t stop to think about if it was right or wrong. She only knew and understood her all encompassing lust for Laura.

Laura’s hips started to move faster, her moans coming between panted breaths. She started to speak as her hips became a blur, bringing her other arm down down help hold Carmilla’s head right where she needed it.

“That’s a good girl. I’m so close baby, so close, right like that, right like that baby. So fucking wet for you, aren’t I? So wet for those lips and that mouth. Fuck, Carm, I’m so fucking close baby, gonna cum all over that beautiful face. You want that my good girl, want to wear how wet you make me?”

Carmilla nodded, she could do nothing else. Her action caused Laura’s hips to jog, she hadn’t been expecting the girl to move and she cried out in pleasure as the friction caused her already sensitive clit to rub in a new way across Carmilla’s mouth and she came unexpectedly, explosively, trapping Carmilla’s head between her open palms and her pussy as the waves of pleasure washed over her.

“Ooooooh fuck! Ohfuckohfuckohfuck!” she cried out as she came.

With careful intention, Laura peeled her fingers from their grip on Carmilla’s head and released the girl, sinking to her knees as the aftershocks subsided.

“Holy shit.” Laura breathed in deep and searched out Carmilla’s gaze.

Carmilla met the girl’s eyes with her own lust pooled ones. She couldn’t fucking believe Laura fucking Hollis had just ridden her face to orgasm while standing in the middle of her apartment, like demanding that level of submission was something that she did on a daily basis. Beyond the unbearable ache in her own cunt she hadn’t even been aware of, her face was a slimy mess of Laura’s arousal, coated forehead to chin, her hair stuck out at odd angles and all she wanted to do was dive headfirst back into Laura’s pussy and use her tongue this time.

Laura read her lust whipped expression for what it was and leaned over to the girl, resting their foreheads together.

“Mm baby, you can spit that out now, I want to hear your voice.”

Carmilla had almost forgotten Laura’s now completely soaked thong was still stuffed in her mouth. She turned her head and spat it out inelegantly against the floor and took in a few deep breaths.

“Fuck.”

Laura chuckled, and tried to tuck Carmilla’s wild cum-drenched hair back into some semblance of neatly behind her ear. Giving up, she leaned forward and claimed Carmilla’s lips, but gently, the girl had just been at the end of her desires and she knew she hadn’t gone easy on her.

Carmilla let out a soft low groan, the blonde’s lips brushing against her own a salve to the fire she had just endured. She reached up a shaky hand and cupped Laura’s cheek.

“You know we’re not done, right?”

Laura let out a throaty laugh and met Carmilla’s eyes.

“Mmm, no we are not, my good girl.”

 _Those words again_. They sent reverberations through Carmilla’s body, and she couldn’t help but shudder with a need that was still so new to her. Ell had made most of the moves, but this, this was something deeper. This pulled at her from the center of who she was, like Laura had inadvertently opened a door she never knew was closed.

“How did you know?”

Laura gave her a gentle kiss, but nipped her lip before leaning back.

“What, that the kickass take-no-prisoners organizer would turn into a mewling kitten at my feet if I just told her how _very good she was_?” Laura had leaned in, and spoke the last few words nose to nose with Carmilla in that velvety tone. She watched the raven haired girl’s pupils dilate.

“Yes,” Carmilla managed, after swallowing twice.

“Honestly, I wasn’t sure if I should try that path until you bit my lip on the roof and leaned into my hand- oh fuck, it just made me want to claim you so badly. The feeling of you giving into your desire, into me, was delicious.”

Laura gazed fondly at the girl.“But when you were in my office earlier and couldn’t get to saying my name, you gave me authority twice first, before making us equal. I already thought you were downright edible, but that started the question. Then when you called me ma’am, I just wanted to take you right there, so nervous and serious and oh so transparently obvious. But we were in my _office_ , and it was a professional meeting and I knew it couldn’t happen. So I enjoyed your company and let you go.”

She smiled at Carmilla. “Then to run into you tonight, when I heard your voice, it went through me like flame, but when I turned around it was you, and my patchy, preconceived idea of you had to go out the window, even further when you told me first about your political life. By the time your sister dragged you off, I understood why she was insistent to do so. I know even more so now, with the rest of what you’ve told me on the roof.”

Laura’s smile turned devious. “But it was something in the look you gave me when you knelt to take off my skirt that just brought me to that place, you looked so open and vulnerable, but so clouded with your desire, I just wanted to chance it so bad, so I did. And fuck do I not regret it.”

Carmilla slumped backward against the leg of her desk, finally stretching out her tired legs, not caring about the sticky squish she felt as her ass met the hardwood floor. She sat silent for a beat.

“Wow,” she breathed out.

A look of concern passed over Laura’s face. Perhaps she really had asked too much, too soon, of the girl. She just had gotten so lost in how good it had felt, Carmilla under her, the girl’s lust glazed eyes, the thrill of her submission.

“Was that too much? I just, you asked, and we-“ Carmilla waved her off with a brush of her hand.

“No, that was- that was incredible.” She met Laura’s eyes with a wide grin, made even more adorable by her post-sex mussed hair.

“You just showed me a part of myself I didn’t really know was there, I needed a moment to process.”

“So this was ok?”

Carmilla quirked her lips and met Laura’s gaze almost shyly. “Oh yes.”

Laura’s eyes darkened and her face turned impish. “Good.”

She stalked across the short distance to Carmilla, and took a seat in the girl’s lap, folding her legs underneath her. She put her arms around Carmilla’s neck and leaning in, she placed light kisses up Carmilla’s neck and very, very slowly, moved her hips.

“That makes me quite happy, because I still haven’t tasted you.”  
  
Carmilla moaned, her body rapidly remembering how hot she had been mere moments before and she reached to grab Laura’s ass and pull the girl closer to her. She could feel Laura’s still present arousal sliding across her skin and she felt like Laura was pulling her desire out from her, just from her touch alone.

“Unf, fuck Laura. I want this, but, floor.”

Laura stopped nibbling Carmilla’s ear and leaned back in her lap. “I have an idea.”

Standing up, she offered Carmilla a hand and the girl took it gratefully, a little wobbly on her feet. Laura headed for the one hallway of the apartment, pulling Carmilla with her. She pointed at a door.

“Closet.”

She pointed to a door directly after it.

“Closet.”

Laura scrunched up her face at Carmilla and pointed to the door on its opposite.

“Bathroom.”

Laura nodded once, satisfied, and opened the door.

Carmilla’s bathroom was the usual NYC size, but she had a short tub, and Laura turned to its faucet and turned the shower on. Measuring for something comfortable, she pulled herself and Carmilla under the spray. Turning to the girl, she cupped Carmilla’s face.

“Let me take care of you.”

Laura tilted Carmilla’s head back so her hair was just under the water. She ran her fingers across Carmilla’s scalp gently and reached for the bottle of conditioner on the ledge. She gently massaged the liquid into Carmilla’s hair and the girl moaned into Laura’s touch, the soft fingers and gentle movement exactly what she needed in the moment.

Her brain was all over the place, processing what had just happened, the heightened levels of lust and desire still pooling in her belly, her surprise and wariness of this new part of herself, even just the fact that the day wasn’t even over yet. She closed her eyes and let Laura’s gentle fingers relax her.

Laura rinsed the girl’s hair and wrapped her arms around Carmilla, meeting the taller girl’s lips with her own. Carmilla melted into the kiss, leaning her wet body into Laura’s. The kiss was slow and gentle, but Carmilla wasn’t content to leave it that way. The water and Laura’s ministrations had brought her back to herself, but the feeling of Laura’s wet body sliding against her was too much to resist, too hard to fight.

She slid her tongue into Laura’s mouth, teasing the other girl and was rewarded when Laura met her with intensity, her arms around Carmilla’s waist sliding down to cup the girl’s ass and pull them closer. Carmilla moaned into Laura’s mouth and attempted to turn off the water behind her without breaking contact with the blonde’s kisses.

As the water turned off, Laura broke the kiss to toss her wet hair out of her face and then began to place open mouthed kisses up Carmilla’s neck.

“Mmm, Laura, fuck-“ The blonde had chosen that moment to curl her tongue around Carmilla’s ear.

“I want you. In my bed. Now.”

Laura almost purred as she leaned back to meet Carmilla’s gaze. The glint was back in her tiger eyes and Carmilla met the challenge.

“Mmm, what, I can’t take you too?” Carmilla quirked her lips at the girl and grinned.

“We’ll have to see.”

They shared a towel quickly, Carmilla taking Laura’s hand and dragging her further into the apartment.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Carmilla gets her revenge

Carmilla pulled Laura into her bedroom and pinned the girl face first to the wall next to the door; moving her one hand still tangled with Laura’s above the both of them and flattening Laura’s hand out to the wall, an unspoken command to leave it there. She heard Laura snort, but the girl complied. Carmilla leaned her entire body against the girl’s back, her nipples rubbing deliciously on Laura’s shoulder blades and slid her hands around Laura’s front to cup her breasts. The blonde arched into her touch, pushing her body back into Carmilla and moaned, tipping her hips to rub her ass against Carmilla’s leg.

The raven haired girl bucked into Laura and pinched the nipples in her hands harder, slipping her leg between Laura’s, her hips forcing the girl’s into the wall. She leaned close to Laura’s ear.

“As fucking hot as that was, this time I’m using my tongue.”

Laura groaned into the wall and couldn’t help but shiver as Carmilla’s left hand slid down from her nipple, across her stomach and cupped her pussy. Her fingers slid across Laura’s very wet folds and both girls moaned, Carmilla biting the ridge of muscle at Laura’s shoulder hard as she made first contact with the girl’s clit.

“Unf, fuck, Carm!” Red hot desire shot through the blonde, Carmilla’s fingers circling her clit way too softly, and she knew it was on purpose. She tried to shimmy her hips in a way that would force the taller girl to put more pressure where she wanted it, but a lick and bite to her earlobe and a dirty chuckle in her ear made her realize her efforts would be futile.

“Now, now, Miss Hollis. We’re not in your school anymore. You’re not in charge here.”

Laura huffed, Carmilla’s hand tweaking her nipples distracting her from her comeback.

“Carm.”

Carmilla slid her fingers past Laura’s clit and teased her entrance, the shorter girl groaning and leaning her head against the wall. She jerked her hips again, breath starting to come in harsh pants. She didn’t beg, but if Carmilla didn’t give her what she wanted soon, she wasn’t fucking sure she wouldn’t.

“Fuck, Carm.”

“Mmm, yes?” Carmilla slipped her thumb forward to ghost against Laura’s clit while she continued to maddeningly dip the tips of her fingers into Laura.

“ _Carmilla_.”

“Yes, Laura?” She could feel the smirk on Carmilla’s lips, her mouth just behind Laura’s ear. Her tongue slipped out and traced a line around the blonde’s sensitive lobe.

“Carm, just-“ Laura growled out the words, Carmilla’s continued actions driving her already flooded pussy to drench the hand teasing her. She could feel her leg muscles starting to shake from the need.

“Use your words, Miss Hollis.”

She wouldn’t do it, wouldn’t fucking do it.

The taller girl slowly dipped half her pointer finger into Laura before removing it, the tease almost an insult to Laura’s want of the girl.

She grunted. Fuck it.

“Carmilla, _please_.”

Carmilla bit down on Laura’s shoulder again as she filled Laura with two fingers, starting up a steadily increasing pace.

“Oh fuck, Carm!” She lost herself in a moan, the feeling of Carmilla finally fucking her blanking her brain out before a well placed thumb against her clit sent her spiraling back into her body, and the pleasure it was experiencing.

Laura met Carmilla’s thrusts, her hips rocking. She could feel the deep heat starting to pool in her belly, the tips of her fingers and toes starting to tingle. The wet sounds of Carmilla’s fingers fucking her only made her hotter and she didn’t think she imagined feeling splattered with her own juices, Carmilla’s fingers drawing both pleasure and desire from her in equal amounts.

The blonde was very rapidly approaching what felt to be a monumental orgasm when suddenly, there was nothing. No heat of Carmilla’s body molding her to the wall, no fingers, no wet sounds, nothing.

She sagged against the wall before turning around to find Carmilla sitting on the edge of the bed behind her, her shapely naked legs daintily crossed, but the two fingers that had just been inside of Laura being licked by one smug tongue belonging to an even more smug grin.

“Mm. You taste good cutie. Get over here to I can really get hot for teacher.” Laura laughed as Carmilla winked at her and she closed the distance between them, climbing into Carmilla’s lap. She ground her hips down into the girl, leaning forward and capturing her lips.

“You’re really fucking mean, you know that?”

Carmilla only smirked at her.

“Let’s see about that.”

She wrapped her arms around Laura and rolled their bodies onto the bed, coming up with her hips between Laura’s now spread legs, the girl on her back.

“Now this looks better.”

Carmilla leaned forward and started to place bites and kisses along the inside of Laura’s left thigh, trailing closer to her center but ignoring it to start the process over from Laura’s right knee, earning a huff and a grunt of “Yes, mean,” from above her. She laughed into the skin at the junction of Laura’s leg and hip and the words were replaced with a sharp intake of breath.

“Goddamnit Carmilla, don’t do this to me.” Laura’s hips jerked, she was almost panting. Carmilla’s fingers had brought her so close, all she wanted was the girl to finish what she had started.

“Don’t do what?” Carmilla’s innocent tone belied her actions, she was tracing patterns with her tongue along just the outside of Laura’s labia, tasting as she went, the girl was absolutely coated in her own juices.

Laura picked her head off the mattress, her fists balled into the comforter and attempted to glare at Carmilla.

“Don’t you fucking make me beg you, _again_. Just. _Eat. Me._ ”

Carmilla hovered over the girl’s clit and met Laura’s eyes, her own blown with desire for the girl underneath her.

“Yes ma’am,” she said in her best purr and bent her head to her task. She flattened her tongue and swept it over Laura’s clit, the girl immediately grabbing her head with both hands and pulling her even closer to her pussy.

“Fuck Carm, just like that baby.” Laura’s head thumped back into the mattress as Carmilla continued to lave her clit, testing and tasting, flicking here and there. Laura’s moans became wordless as Carmilla sucked her clit into her mouth and nibbled on the tender nerves. Her hips bucked and Carmilla wrapped an arm around each leg to help hang on, her tongue lashing at Laura’s clit.

Carmilla brought her left hand back to join her busy tongue, sliding two fingers back into Laura who immediately arched off the bed.

“Oh fuck Carm! Yes baby, more, I need more!”

Carmilla added a third finger and matched her tongue’s swipes across Laura’s clit to the movements of her hand and she could feel Laura’s walls start to tighten, the girl was close. She was enjoying the taste and feel of Laura too much to let the girl go this easy. She slowed her movements and Laura let out a strangled cry.

“Fuck Carmilla, please no, please I need to fucking cum, I was so close!”

Carmilla increased her speed just a tiny bit, Laura’s hips trying to force herself down on Carmilla’s fingers faster, but the dark haired girl held on with her right arm and chuckled into Laura’s skin as she took a long flat lick of the girl’s clit. She continued to tease, keeping Laura’s orgasm just out of reach.

Laura was about to let loose with a stream of expletives but Carmilla chose that moment to suddenly ratchet her speed back up and Laura could only screech her surprise.

“FUCKING HELL CARMILLA YOU’D BETTER NOT STOP!”

Laura’s arms were shaking as she held Carmilla’s head to her, hips a blur, legs starting to tremble. Carmilla kept up the pace, Laura’s ragged breathing growing harsher. Carmilla could feel Laura’s orgasm approaching again, but this time she wouldn’t torture the girl further. Adding a twist to the fingers inside the girl, she started to brush against a spot that had Laura suddenly gasping in lungfuls of air, her whole body vibrating. Carmilla focused on hitting that same spot with each thrust, sucking the girl’s clit back into her mouth and flicking the nub with her tongue.

Laura was on fire, her entire body shaking, she’d never been so heated without having come, like Carmilla had pushed her past what her body could even handle. Her back was arched off the bed, and Carmilla’s fingers were unlocking a new tightness in her belly, one she didn’t think she could stop if she tried. Her only choice was to give in to Carmilla, give into the sensation.

She opened her mouth and screamed Carmilla’s name as she came, shaking violently as her body began to squirt, much to her utter surprise.

Carmilla immediately put her mouth where her fingers had been and drank of the girl, moaning her own desire and want into the girl’s flesh. She used her tongue to swirl through Laura’s opening, tasting and enjoying as much of the girl as she could, prolonging Laura’s aftershocks.

Laura felt boneless, Carmilla having apparently stolen them away and left in their place one of the, no _the_ best, orgasm of her life. She had no idea she was even capable of doing that but, holy fuck. She tried to get air back in her lungs and pawed at Carmilla’s head, still buried between her thighs. The girl was gently cleaning her with her tongue, wanting to enjoy every bit of Laura as she could before leaving her new favorite place.

“Oh hell Carm, come here.” Laura’s voice came out a croak, so far beyond sex roughened it sounded almost alien to her.

Carmilla placed one last soft kiss on Laura’s clit, and much the Cheshire Cat, crawled up Laura’s body and collapsed half on top of the girl, slipping her right leg over Laura’s and curling around her.

“Well cutie, that was a rather explosive ending. I think I aced this project.”

“Carmilla? Shut up.” Laura wrapped a hand in Carmilla’s hair and pulled the girl’s lips to her own. She tasted herself and moaned, a fleeting twitch of pleasure going through her thoroughly exhausted body. The kiss had gentle passion and she luxuriated in the feeling of being so sated by this incredible creature in her arms. She let her head fall back against the mattress, the kiss breaking.

“Karnstein, you definitely surprise a girl.” She crooked a grin up at the raven haired girl who grinned back, her hand moving to draw patterns on Laura’s stomach.

“I do have to keep my air of mystery.”

Laura snorted.

“Sure Carm.”

Carmilla smiled down at her and tucked a piece of hair behind Laura’s ear. She shifted her hips, now much more aware that her own soaked center had been pressing against the blonde’s leg. Laura caught the movement and started flexing her quad muscle, pushing harder into Carmilla’s clit.

Carmilla hissed and couldn’t stop her hips from responding, rolling forward into Laura.

“Oh fuck.” Carmilla dipped her head as she continued to grind herself on Laura’s leg.

Laura looked up at her with a glint in her eyes.

“My good girl hasn’t come yet.” She spoke the words in that same low velvet tone and a shiver ran through Carmilla, a moan she couldn’t control slipping from her lips.

“Mm yes baby, you’d like that wouldn’t you? That fucking little mouth of yours was so fantastic I can’t enact the plan I had in mind, but there’s no way you’re not screaming my name after what you just pulled.”

Carmilla wasn’t sure whether to feel proud or apprehensive, but the molten look in Laura’s eyes and her own need overwhelmed any hesitancy she felt and she just wanted to have the girl touch her.

“Come up here and bring your pussy with you.”

Carmilla quirked an eyebrow at Laura, not understanding.

Laura’s mouth slid into an impish smile and she slowly stuck her tongue out at Carmilla and flicked the tip at her.

Carmilla suddenly understood. The tug in her belly pulled taught and she felt a new wetness spill across Laura’s leg. The other girl chuckled.

“Save some of that for me.”

Carmilla moaned at Laura’s tone, that voice doing things to her voices just shouldn’t do, but she was so so glad hers did. She raised herself up on her arms, still straddling Laura’s leg. The other girl reached for her hips and tugged, smirking at Carmilla.

“Come here baby, don’t be shy on me now.”

Carmilla shivered again, lifting herself up. She shifted upwards and swung her right leg over Laura’s whole body and put her knee down to the left of Laura’s head, the girl’s arms wrapping around her hips and pulling her hungrily to her mouth.

Carmilla had barely enough time to balance herself before she was overtaken with the sensation of Laura’s talented tongue exploring her folds. She looked down her stomach and Laura’s eyes met hers. The girl winked and sucked Carmilla’s clit into her mouth, running her tongue over it. Carmilla’s head rocked back.

“Oh fuck, Laura.”

The arms around her hips tightened, their staccato rhythm completely overtaking her. All she knew of her existence was the line between her brain and Laura’s tongue. She pawed at her own nipples, tugging and rolling them as moan after moan fell from her lips.

Laura dipped her tongue down to Carmilla’s entrance, flicking the edges, a play on the same torture Carmilla had put her through earlier. The raven haired girl’s hips twitched out a stronger beat, trying in vain to get Laura’s tongue deeper inside her.

“Lauuura, plllleaasssseeeee.” Carmilla could scarcely believe the words came from her, sounding through a guttural moan.

She felt more than heard Laura’s answering grunt, but her tongue shot as far as it could into Carmilla and didn’t stop, flicking in and out. Carmilla could only shake her head back and forth, the sensations almost too much, Laura’s nose somehow still bumping up against her clit and driving Carmilla’s orgasm to the front of her existence.

“Oh fuck Laura, I’m gonna-“

Laura scrambled to bring her tongue back to Carmilla’s clit, lashing the flesh in the way she knew had Carmilla shaking earlier. Carmilla felt like she was being pulled apart, the one guy-line to hold onto the fingers digging into her thighs, she knew she would relish the bruises tomorrow but for now the pain was one more sensation in the maelstrom of her oncoming orgasm.

Her hands dug into Laura’s scalp, her eyes glued to the ones underneath her hips, their eye contact driving her closer to the edge. Laura kept her iron gaze on Carmilla, her tongue working Carmilla those last few inches. She knew the girl was seconds from coming, just needing one last thing to tip her over the edge. A growl tumbled through her chest and she tightened her hands around Carmilla’s legs, closed her eyes once, met Carmilla’s, and nodded.

She didn’t know it was the sign she was waiting for, but with Laura’s nod she catapulted off the edge she’d been clinging to, and with a great lungful of air, screamed Laura’s name. Her body convulsed on Laura’s tongue, the girl not letting up and Carmilla started to see stars, her head thrown back and one hand gripped her own hair, as if she could tether herself to this plane by sheer will.

Her body wasn’t listening to slowing down, Laura’s insistent tongue still working her overheated clit and she realized she was hurtling quickly toward her second orgasm. It hit her with barely less force and with a yell she collapsed on top of Laura, her whole body shaking.

She managed to roll off Laura and flopped on her back beside the girl.

“Holy fuck.” It came out in barely a whisper.

Laura looked over at her, licking her lips.

“I’d have to agree. You are a holy fuck.”

Carmilla groaned but still smiled an exhausted, happy smile.

“You’re killing me, Hollis.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Carmilla and Laura greet the day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all, didn’t mean to put so much space between updates but a close friend’s mom passed and I’ve been caught up in that a bit. I hope to keep updates to once a week. 
> 
> Thanks for reading, and your messages & kudos. I haven’t written anything in a long while and you all make a folk feel welcome :-)

The smell of coffee woke Carmilla, her confusion and limbs tangled in the sheets bringing her quickly to consciousness.

 _Laura_.

She couldn’t stop the grin that her lips formed. Last night had been beyond incredible, the connection she had felt with Laura was so quick and intense. No one had made her body, made _her_ feel what the girl had in the hours they had spent together. She almost felt a different person this morning, like the tiny whirlwind yesterday morning had pulled her in, too, sending her off on a completely different course.

Her body hummed with the energy they had shared and she could still feel the ghost of Laura’s arms that had wrapped her back tightly to Laura’s chest right before falling asleep, Laura’s even breathing the last thing she remembered before she too had succumbed.

Still grinning, she stretched across her bed, her naked body prickling with goosebumps as she dislodged the comforter wrapped around her legs. She groaned softly to herself and sat up, running her hands through her wild bed hair.

“Good morning sleepyhead.”

The voice from the door caused Carmilla to look up and she met Laura’s playful smile with one of her own. The girl was holding two mugs and stepped into the room, handing one to Carmilla. She had one of Carmilla’s flannel shirts on, only a few buttons buttoned and Carmilla couldn’t help but appreciate how fucking beautiful Laura was, tousled hair curling over the edges of her shoulders, her lean strong legs very much on display.

“I made the assumption you were a ‘black as my soul’ kind of coffee person.”

Carmilla laughed and nodded, taking a sip.

“Let me guess, I don’t have any sugar left because it’s all in that mug.” She indicated Laura’s with a tilt of her head.

“Well you don’t have any cocoa, so I had to make do.”

Carmilla snorted.

Laura sat on the bed next to Carmilla and the two girls took a moment to just watch each other as they both drank from their mugs, sharing smiles.

“So, uh, have any plans today?”

“What cupcake, you want to spend time in daylight with me too?” Carmilla smirked over the rim of her mug.

“Cupcake?”

“You’re cute and tiny and taste pretty damn sweet. I’d say it works.” Carmilla smiled at the slight blush that appeared on Laura’s cheeks. The honey haired girl smiled and cleared her throat.

“About that...” Laura drifted off and Carmilla frowned.

Laura placed her coffee cup on the nightstand. Turning back she relieved Carmilla of hers as well, and then took the girl’s hands in her own, meeting Carmilla’s wary eyes with a look of pure earnestness.

“Well, Carmilla. I feel like I need to be honest about something, since I didn’t get a chance to last night.”

Carmilla’s frown deepened and Laura squeezed her hands reassuringly.

“You see, well, ah. I just wanted to let you know-“ here her smile went from pure innocence to a wicked grin, “that no one’s ever made me squirt before. I know you’re going to get a big head about it, but, fuck Carm, that was goddamn unbelievable.”

Carmilla’s face slipped from caution to confusion to understanding. She couldn’t stop the smug smile that followed.

“Oh really? Tell me more about that.”

Laura laughed and leaned forward, catching Carmilla’s lips in a searing kiss. She brought her hands up to cup Carmilla’s face and pulled back, enjoying the unfocused look in Carmilla’s eyes.

“Mmm Karnstein, I think I might like to keep you around for a bit.”

Carmilla ducked her head and smiled, the other girl tipping her head back up to make eye contact. Her face was softer and she gave Carmilla a smile she hadn’t seen before, but she so wanted to continue seeing.

“Is that ok with you?”

Carmilla kissed her gently and leaned her forehead against Laura’s.

“Definitely.”

Laura’s stomach chose that moment to growl loudly and the two girls collapsed in a joint fit of laughter.

“Alright cutie, I think we need to feed the other beast.”

—

  
They sat down in the diner and Laura immediately dove into the menu, perusing the waffle and pancake options available to her. Carmilla had managed to find some clothes to fit the girl, as much as she loved the pencil skirt, it wasn’t the greatest for brunch. Carmilla thought Laura looked adorable in the black hoodie and baggy cargo pants that sat right at the edge of her hips. She definitely enjoyed the stripe of muscled skin that kept being revealed as the girl had walked animatedly next to her on their way to the diner, the two getting lost in a conversation over Laura’s deep love of British sci-fi.

The waiter approached them and Carmilla ordered a cup of coffee, Laura her earlier denied cocoa, with requested extra marshmallows. Carmilla smiled at that as the waiter left to get their drinks and then turned to the menu herself, settling on an omelette with home fries.

She looked up to find Laura peeking over the menu at her and she lifted an eyebrow. Laura waggled her eyebrows at Carmilla and then pretended to sink dramatically below the edge. Carmilla chuckled and set her menu aside. Laura closed hers and reached a hand out across the table, palm up. Carmilla stretched hers to meet it and intertwined their fingers.

“So what are you getting?”

“Ham and cheese omelette. You? Wait, let me guess. The chocolate chip and banana pancakes.”

“How did you know?” Laura stuck her tongue out at Carmilla, laughing.

“Highest sugar content of the whole menu? And don’t think I didn’t see you eyeing the pies when we came in. But you’re in luck, the pancakes are delicious. Almost as delicious as you.”

Laura laughed, but squeezed Carmilla’s hand. “Ever the charmer, Karnstein.”

The waiter approached with their drinks and they gave their orders in. Laura immediately licked her lips at the sight of the almost overflowing giant mug of cocoa and took a big sip. She put the cup down only to be met with Carmilla looking at her very amusedly.

“What?”

“Cutie, you’ve got some- here,” Carmilla slipped out of her side of the booth and slid in next to Laura. She leaned in and kissed the surprised Laura, who melted into the unexpected affection. Carmilla pulled away only to suck Laura’s top lip into her mouth before she released it and kissed the girl again.

Leaning back, she smiled at Laura. “Had some whipped cream on your lip, creampuff.”

Laura smiled, a little dazed. “So the pastry thing is a thing then?”

“Yep, definitely.”

—

After brunch, Carmilla suggested a stroll through Flushing Meadows Corona Park, since Laura had reluctantly divulged during the meal that although the borough had been her home for over a year, she’d never actually explored anything beyond Astoria, which Carmilla found completely unacceptable.

They took the train, Carmilla leaning against the door, while Laura looked past her shoulder, watching the view out the window of the elevated line. Carmilla still couldn’t believe this was her morning. How had the last twenty four hours really happened? She watched Laura as the other girl took in the scenery, her eyes lighting up the closer they got to Citi Field.

“Hey Carm, you ever go to a Mets game?”

She snorted. “Well you wouldn’t catch me alive at a Yankees game, but yeah, I’ve been to a few. Some pretty awesome concerts too, in the summer.”

Laura tugged at Carmilla’s jacket, she’d caught sight of something else out the window.

“Wait, wait. The Unisphere is here?? Like in Iron Man and Men in Black?”

Carmilla grinned at the girl. Of course she would know the movie references.

“Yep cutie. Originally built for the World’s Fair. I thought you might want to see all the buildings that are still here. Ever watch The Wiz?”

Laura nodded animatedly. “I love that movie Carm! Move over ye olde Wizard of Oz. I always loved it so much more than the original, but those trash cans with mouths always scared the hell out of me when I was little.”

Carmilla chucked. “Me too. When they land in Oz and meet Glinda and the Munchkins? Filmed right over there too.” She gestured beyond the Unisphere.

“Oh man, Carm. You have to show me all of it!” Laura’s eyes sparkled at Carmilla and she felt that tug in her chest again.

—

They walked down the ramp from the train station, Laura excitedly taking Carmilla’s hand in her own, her arm swinging, when suddenly she stopped, Carmilla getting yanked to a standstill as well.

“Oh Carm!! We have do to the dance!! This is our yellow brick road!”

“Cupcake, no.”

“Caaaaarrmmmm!” Laura pouted her best you-know-you-want-to pout and Carmilla could only withstand it for so long. This girl was something else, every interaction revealing the depth of Laura’s personality.

Carmilla let Laura link arms with her and off they went down the ramp, Laura singing “Ease On Down the Road” at a decent volume. After the first few stumbling dance steps, they fell into a rhythm and Carmilla couldn’t help but laugh and start to sing along. She hadn’t felt this care free in years.

She glanced over at Laura and her breath caught, the girl’s honey hair whipped up by the breeze and their dancing, her smile a mile wide as she unabashedly sang and her cheeks pinked with the effort; Carmilla thought she had never seen someone so vulnerably in the moment. She was beautiful.

—

They sat on the edge of the fountain wall, the water not yet on, looking up at the Unisphere. Laura’s smile hadn’t left her face, and a too large part of Carmilla hoped she was the reason for some of it, not just the park.

“Carm, this is awesome, thank you.”

Carmilla shrugged and gave Laura a small smile.

“The park is one of my favorite places. I come out here a lot to just walk around, think and write. When it’s warmer, I bring my hammock and take a nap under the trees. I like that there’s history here, tangible, real. One of the things I’ve always loved about this city is that every step you take, someone else, many someone else's, have stepped where you have, on their own journey. There’s so much history, everywhere you look. Here there’s just a little more sky to enjoy it under.”

Laura scooted closer to Carmilla and placed a hand on the girl’s thigh.

“What’s your favorite part of the city?”

Carmilla ducked her head before meeting Laura’s eyes.

“Promise you won’t laugh?”

Laura crossed her heart with her other hand and nodded.

“Ever since I was little, I’ve always loved the Statue of Liberty. I’m not sure if it was the idea of what she stood for, or the thought I had as a kid that this beautiful tall immovable woman was protecting the city and greeting its newcomers that stuck with me more, but I take the ferry a lot just to pass by and say hello. I talk to her in my head sometimes.” She paused. “I call her my green friend.”

Laura’s eyes sparkled with mirth, but true to her word, she had no intention of laughing.

“Does your green friend ever say anything back?”

Carmilla smiled and shook her head before her smile was replaced with a small frown.

“No, she never says anything back, but after E-, after the candidate, visiting her was one of the things I really hung on to to make myself feel better. She had been there for me before that trainwreck, and just seeing her, surviving everything humans and nature could throw at her, all these long years, it gave me hope I could weather it all too.”

Carmilla glanced up and Laura was giving her that indecipherable look again, and it made her both incredibly nervous and feel entirely seen.

“Karnstein, you keep surprising me.” Laura smiled and reached up to tuck a lock of hair behind Carmilla’s ear before cupping her cheek. She leaned in and brushed her lips softly against the taller girl’s, lingering a little before pulling back, softly stroking the girl’s cheek.

“How did I ever get the chance to have you stumble into my school?”

Carmilla could feel her cheeks starting to blush, and instead of trying to hide it, she held Laura’s gaze.

“It almost wasn’t me, you know.”

Laura’s eyebrows raised.

“Really?”

Carmilla nodded.

“I was actually covering for one of the folks who normally would do the presentations, Kirsch, but he did some inane thing during an intramural soccer game and is on crutches so I took pity on him.”

“Carmilla Karnstein, heart of gold.” Laura fluttered her eyelashes and Carmilla laughed.

“Don’t get any ideas Creampuff, it happens rarely. I’m not really big on the heroics.”

Laura quirked her lip and smiled.

“Hmm.”

—

“So you’re telling me on the other side of this stupid door in this stupid wall is Munchkinland? And I’m so close but I can’t actually get in?”

Laura pouted and tugged on Carmilla’s jacket like a child. Carmilla laughed and shook her head.

“Sorry cupcake, but the city hasn’t invested much in preserving these, so what you see is pretty much what you get. The inside is all torn up anyway, sadly. Last event that used this space was almost ten years ago. They had a mock pirate ship battle, I wish I’d been able to go. Since then, there’s a local group that keeps trying to find restoration funds, but since the park isn’t in Manhattan, there’s not much support.”

“But Carm, it’s Munchkinland! How could people not want to save it?”

“I don’t know, cutie. Maybe you should raise the money. I’ve got five bucks in my pocket that’s all yours.”

She said it with a smile, not expecting the sudden excited and determined look on Laura’s face.

“Maybe I will!”

Carmilla grinned. She was liking each facet of Laura the girl chose to show her, from the sex fiend who claimed her body to this Laura, childlike with glee but still bursting with focus and purpose. She was endlessly intrigued by the smaller girl, and she was letting herself just feel through the experience, trying to shove down and ignore the voice that still told her what her life had proven to her time and again would apply here. Even if it was true, that this was just a fever dream before the eventual downward spiral and doom, she was going to do her damndest to enjoy it, even with the pain to come.

—

They drew closer to Meadow Lake, Laura’s arm tucked through Carmilla’s, the two girls strolling down the tree lined path toward the water. In the warmer months the lake would be full of ducks and paddle boats, but in the early spring, Carmilla and Laura had the vista almost to themselves, a few games of futbol being played on the adjacent fields, the lake empty but for a family of swans.

As they curved around the lakeshore, Carmilla pointed out where the Dragon boats would race each summer, and made Laura laugh with stories of watching the City Hall team compete, the boats that had been overturned and duck related losses.

Carmilla steered them to a set of large rocks on the shoreline, taking a seat on the closest and inviting Laura to join her. The smaller girl nudged Carmilla’s legs apart and put gentle pressure on her shoulders, a hint to scoot back. Carmilla obliged, and Laura sat between Carmilla’s knees, leaning back against the girl’s chest. She rested both her hands on Carmilla’s raised kneecaps and snuggled into the chair she had made of the girl.

The raven haired girl’s chest tugged again at how effortlessly comfortable Laura was around her, the girl’s scent overwhelming her senses in the best way. Before she could stop herself, she placed a series of small kisses up Laura’s neck, shivering at Laura’s small noises of pleasure. Laura reached back and ran her hand through Carmilla’s hair, pulling the girl closer to her neck.

“More.”

Carmilla bit her bottom lip and felt the tightness at the base of her own neck, the precursor she knew to her desires being stoked. She pressed more open mouthed kisses against the girl’s skin, trailing her tongue up from her collarbone to just below her ear, softly sucking at the skin there and feeling Laura’s hum of enjoyment. The fingers in her hair scratched at her scalp and she murmured into Laura’s ear.

Laura shifted in Carmilla’s embrace and turned her head toward the girl, a smile on her face. She tucked one leg under Carmilla’s bent knee and leaned back against Carmilla’s other leg.

“What am I gonna do with you, Karnstein?” She tucked a wayward strand of hair behind Carmilla’s ear and stroked along the taller girl’s jaw. How quickly that was becoming a habit of Laura’s wasn’t lost on Carmilla.

Laura placed a gentle kiss against Carmilla’s lips and regarded the girl whose arms she was in.

“This is the most comfortable I’ve felt in ages. I’ve been so wrapped up in the school, getting settled, spending time with LaF, keeping up with everything that goes with working with the city... I think this is the first day I’ve truly just relaxed in months, if I can even remember when. I feel still. You make me feel still, Carm, and I think I could get lost in that pretty easily, and I’m not sure how to think about that. I feel like declarations are going to start coming out of my mouth, and that’s all too big, but I can’t say I’d be sad if this feeling continued.”

Carmilla felt the warmth spread across her chest at Laura’s words, so glad to know that she wasn’t the only one feeling intrigued by their connection. She drew her arms around the girl, pulling her deeper into the embrace. Laura leaned her head against Carmilla’s shoulder, her nose nuzzling Carmilla’s neck.

“Cupcake, I’d be lying if I didn’t say I was a little wary too, but I think the stronger thing I’m feeling is that I’m really happy you blew into my life, coffee drenched shirt and all. I didn’t expect any of this to happen, and neither did you, but I’m glad it did. Even just sitting here with you, it feels right in a way that I didn’t realize I missed so much.”

They lapsed into silence, both comfortable with the admissions they had made, but lost in their own thoughts.

Carmilla looked across the lake where the swan family had paddled into view, and watched them as they investigated a patch of reeds. She took a slow deep breath and let it out just as slowly, wanting to imprint this moment deeply in her memory. Laura’s scent, the weight of her leaning against her chest, the feeling of her hair tickling Carmilla’s face, the breeze buffering both their bodies, the way Laura fit so well into her arms. This could be a week, a month, even just today, and Carmilla knew she wouldn’t forget how she felt- seen and appreciated. She leaned her head against Laura’s and sighed happily.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our day w Hollstein continues...

“Carm, I’m soooo hungry. Why haven’t you fed me yet?”

Carmilla laughed.

“Buttercup, you had 2 cookies and a waffle covered in spekuloos and whipped cream while we walked through the park. How can you be hungry?”

Laura leaned back against the train door and folded her arms across her chest and shrugged.

“That was then. I’m hungry now.”

Carmilla reached for the girl and pulled her closer, their touches after the lakeside conversation coming more often, neither of them noticing. She nestled Laura’s folded hands against her rib cage and wrapped her arm around the girl. It had just begun to feel natural.

“Food we can definitely do, but real food. Actual food. Not a sugar high masquerading as a meal.”

Laura laughed and pecked Carmilla on the lips.

“Is there anything good to eat in your neighborhood?”

“Is there any- cutie, you have _no_ idea. Spin the globe in your mind and pick a country, I can find you a place to eat. Indian, Mexican, Peruvian, Colombian, Korean, Tibetan... take your pick, and that’s not even close to the whole list. This zip code is the most diverse in the _world_.”

“Tibetan? I’ve never had Tibetan food before. That would be cool. You know that means we’re going to have to go eat at them all now, right? I mean if it’s the most diverse, we’ll be at it a while.”

Laura smiled widely and Carmilla matched her. This girl was just melting away all her insecurities. She suddenly felt the need to thank Kirsch for his injury the next time she saw him.

“Eating here is so dangerous, you can get nearly anything delivered to your apartment, some weekends I just can’t help myself and end up lazily ordering my way through the countries.”

They reached Carmilla’s stop and exited the train, Laura’s hand finding Carmilla’s like her own personal magnet. They came down the stairs to the street and Carmilla led Laura around the corner of the block, a destination in mind.

She stopped in front of a fairly nondescript storefront and looked at Laura expectantly.

“Ever heard of momo?”

Laura shook her head, a bit puzzled. She looked up at the awning in front of her.

“We’re eating in a barber shop?”

Carmilla grinned and pointed to the second floor.

“Nope. One of my favorite hidden hole in the wall places. They serve the most delicious momo, which are Tibetan dumplings. Up for an adventure?”

Laura squeezed Carmilla’s hand.

“With you? Of course.”

Carmilla beamed and opened the street level door, leading Laura up the steep stairs, past a door for a beauty parlor and through a somewhat hidden door beyond. The room past it was surprisingly bright and airy, the table level windows letting in all the afternoon light. The simple wood tables were mostly taken by other groups, but Carmilla crossed the room to the one empty table in the corner. She pulled Laura’s seat out for her, the girl smiling as she sat, and then Carmilla took the chair opposite.

“I should ask before we order how your spice levels are. Tibetan cuisine doesn’t hold back on the heat.”

Laura grinned.

“Bring it on.”

Carmilla grinned back at her.

“Ok cutie. We could get a little bit of everything, if you want. Unless there’s something you’re allergic to or don’t like. I’d rather not have you in the hospital, even if you would look cute in an open backed gown.”

Laura rolled her eyes at Carmilla and stuck her tongue out.

“Nope. No allergies here, so you’ll have to keep that fantasy on the back burner. Food me!”

Carmilla got the waitstaff’s attention and ordered for them both.

“We’re going to get a few orders of momo, please, the Teal, Ja Sha and Tsak Sha. Oh and two lassis, please.”

The waiter nodded and called the order back to the open kitchen after moving away from their table.

“Fancy Carm eats fancy food.”

Laura gave her a teasing look.

“Cupcake, this is just delicious street food at a table, nothing too fancy about it.”

Carmilla reached across the table for Laura’s hand. She marveled in the soft feeling of Laura’s palm, idly stroking her fingertips across the skin. She still felt like she needed to pinch herself. She’d never brought anyone here, not the few dates she had attempted after Ell, and not even Ell herself. This had been her spot, where she could disappear for a few hours, enjoying a Butter Tea while she read a book and worked her way through the delicious dumplings. She hadn’t even hesitated when Laura mentioned she had never eaten Tibetan food, knew only her favorite place would do. The girl was obliterating her inner walls and didn’t even know it.

“What are you thinking about?”

The raven haired girl was broken out of her thoughts, and smiled at Laura.

“Just about this cute girl I met with tiger’s eyes. I can’t seem to not want to share myself with her. It’s a little unnerving, but I’m enjoying it.”

Laura’s eyes softened and she curled her fingers around Carmilla’s.

“Well, if she’s anything like me, I think she’s probably pretty smitten too.”

Carmilla’s heart did a little leap and she gazed back at Laura, searching her eyes for anything to be afraid of, but found only open honesty. _How did the world let her find a creature like this?_

The waiter returned and set a lassi in front of each of them, along with little metal serving bowls of hot sauce. The scent of peppers filled the air between them.

“Wow you weren’t kidding, that smells like serious business.”

Carmilla laughed.

“I would dip your fork in now, just the edge, and then give it a taste before you go dunking your momo in it, you may really regret that action otherwise.”

Laura did as instructed, her eyes flying wide open as the heat hit her tastebuds. She reached for the lassi and took a pull from her straw, her face changing to one of almost delirious happiness.

“Holy crap Carm, you weren’t joking! That’s HOT. Also, what is this? It’s heavenly.”

Carmilla chuckled.

“I love the sauce, but you definitely need to build up a tolerance to it. And the lassi’s are awesome. Mostly yogurt and fruit, but they’re perfect for exactly what you did, cooling the heat of the sauce.”

“I could get used to this.”

Laura smiled at her and the implication of the future of her statement made Carmilla’s ears pink but she tried to joke it away.

“Momo will always be there for you. Hungry, drunk, happy or sad. Dumplings are forever.”

Laura tipped her head back and laughed throatily at Carmilla. With a snort she brought her eyes back to the raven haired girl. Her face softened and she smiled.

“I want to know what else is in that endless library you carry around in that skull, Carm. It’s an utterly intriguing bit about you, how you see the world, what holds interest for you and how you express it.”

Laura drew patterns on Carmilla’s hand, her fingertips brushing against the skin. She looked as if she knew the effect her words were going to have on the older girl.

Carmilla was debating how to reply when she was distracted by the return of the waiter with their food, she honestly wasn’t sure how to process the level of genuine interest Laura voiced.

The waiter placed the three dishes between the girls, pointed out which was which and left them to enjoy the meal.

“Ok Carm, where do I start?”

“Well, we’ve got chicken, beef and veggie & potato, so up to you, really.”

Carmilla grabbed a beef one and dunked it heartily in the deep red hot sauce before popping the whole thing rather unceremoniously in her mouth. Laura picked a chicken one and dabbed hers lightly in the sauce, taking a bite. She rolled her eyes in exaggerated pleasure and looked at Carmilla.

“These are delicious!”

The dark haired girl nodded and smiled around her mouthful, too stuffed to speak.

They ate in companionable silence but for the happy sounds of Laura discovering a new love of momo and the occasional quick straw slurps of lassi to soothe an overzealous hot sauce dunking.

—

“Cupcake you’ve gotta be kidding me! How do you even get yourself into situations like that?”

Laura leaned on Carmilla as they walked, their hands intertwined and wiped her eyes, tears of mirth rolling down her cheeks.

“LaF and I narrowly avoided a lot of trouble in college, the whole exploding jello tower was really just one of the more spectacular achievements. Don’t ever tell LaF there’s a substance they can’t manipulate into a science lesson. I just don’t think they anticipated quite the velocity adding alka seltzer would have. We were banned from the lab for a month until our advisor had calmed down and we’d gotten the stains out of the ceiling.”

“Pretty impressive Miss Hollis.”

  
They were walking back to Carmilla’s apartment, trading embarrassing stories of their younger years. Carmilla had told a few involving herself and Mattie, though it was mostly Mattie discovering Carmilla in a rather delicate situations and raising hell. Laura found them hysterical and wasn’t surprised that the dynamic she had witnessed the day before had a strong foundation.

“It really doesn’t compare with attempting to steal your neighbor’s birthday cake through their kitchen window! What on Earth made you think that was a good idea?”

Carmilla shrugged.

“I hadn’t eaten chocolate in a long time. Besides, my neighbor was an asshole.”

“So you stole it for the sake of humanity?”

“Exactly.”

Laura snorted.

“Little Carm: Robin Hood in Training. Protecting defenseless chocolate cakes.”

Carmilla winked roguishly at the blonde.

“And saving beautiful maidens.”

“At this rate I’m going to have to start calling you Oliver Queen.”

“Pfft. I look so much better in leather pants.”

Laura started laughing before the mental image formed. She looked at Carmilla, a little too interested.

“Wait, you have leather pants?”

Carmilla’s look turned sultry.

“Why Miss Hollis, have we stumbled upon a kink?”

“Oh this is something I need to see. For the good of humanity, really.”

Carmilla laughed heartily. She couldn’t wait to see the look on Laura’s face when the girl realized she had more than one pair.

“I think we can make that happen.”

Laura licked her lips.

—

Carmilla opened the door to her apartment, her eyes landing on the clothes they had left scattered across her desk. She focused on the lump of Laura’s thong and her thoughts turned to the night before. While their touches through the day had been quite innocent, to her it felt like each carried an echo of the spark of the intense energy they had found in the other. Her body hummed with a day’s worth of affection.

Laura followed her in and shut the door.

“Alone again, Karnstein.”

That fucking _voice_.

Before she was aware of it, she’d grabbed Laura by the front of the hoodie and pushed her into the room, only stopping when the backs of Laura’s legs had hit the edge of the couch and the girl sat down unceremoniously, a wicked smile on her lips.

Carmilla wasted no time and climbed into Laura’s lap, her lips quickly meeting the blonde’s, who chuckled into Carmilla’s mouth and brought her hands up to cup Carmilla’s ass and pull the girl closer.

Carmilla knew Laura had done it on purpose. The blonde knew Carmilla would react this way, knew what it did to her. The thought that Laura wanted her to have this reaction, wanted to bring it out of her was still the hottest part of the whole experience. This incredible woman desired her, and she was going to let herself get lost in that feeling for as long as she could.

The raven haired girl ground her hips down into Laura’s lap, eliciting a growl from the smaller girl, whose tongue and teeth were traveling a path down Carmilla’s neck. Laura dug her fingers into Camilla’s ass and urged the girl to rut harder against her abs, sucking at her pulse point.

“Laura, I need more. I need to feel you.”

Carmilla tugged at the hoodie and Laura let go of her ass in order to have the sleeves pulled over her head, her own hands quickly tossing her bra elsewhere. Carmilla was pulling off her black tee and bra, Laura’s teeth biting at the soft skin under her ribs before licking a circle around her belly button causing her to quickly suck in a breath.

“Mmf. Oh fuck.”

Laura’s hands were on the button and zipper of her pants and then her left was sliding inside, the other tugging Carmilla’s pants as far down her hips as they could with Carmilla straddling her. They bunched up underneath her ass but it was enough space for Laura to get her fingers where she and Carmilla wanted them.

Both groaned as Laura’s fingers skimmed across Carmilla’s already slick skin, her clit needy for the attention.

“Oh baby, you’re already so wet for me. You want me to make you cum, don’t you, my little minx.”

She looked up at Carmilla, the girl’s dark eyes approaching hazy and unfocused. Laura curled her lips into a knowing smirk.

“Mmm, yes. My good girl is a needy girl.”

Carmilla moaned as Laura bit down on the swell of her breast, her hands grabbing at Laura’s shoulders. The girl’s fingers had found a rhythm, teasing her clit in focused circles, and Carmilla’s hips mirrored the movement. She felt so wanton, letting this girl touch her however she wanted. She could feel her orgasm trying to pull at her but she just wanted more. More of Laura, everywhere.

“Mm inside. I need you inside me.” Carmilla’s hips twitched as Laura complied, sliding two of her fingers through the wetness. Carmilla’s moan was throaty when Laura entered her, her hips immediately dropping to pull Laura’s fingers in deeper.

Laura grunted, the angle of the still bunched pants not helping her much, but she was learning how to get Carmilla where she wanted her.

“Baby, you like that? You like riding me? Mm, you do don’t you? You like being my good little needy girl.”

Carmilla bit her lip and tried to keep her moan from escaping at Laura’s words, her hips fighting harder to keep Laura’s fingers inside her.

“I want you to ride me until you lose yourself. Can you do that, sweet one? Can you give me that?”

Laura added a third finger and Carmilla’s moans grew ragged.

“I need to hear you say yes, can you do that?”

Carmilla grunted, keeping eye contact with Laura growing more difficult as she bent her body to the task, her hips rutting against Laura’s fingers.

“Yes, yes. Fuck I want this, yes!”

Laura began to pump her fingers, driving Carmilla’s hips to match her speed, her other hand moving to ghost touches against the girl’s clit. Her view of Carmilla, the girl’s head thrown back, muscles in her neck and shoulders standing taut against her skin as she fucked herself on Laura’s hand, set her blood to rage in a way no one else had.

She’d had lovers over the years who she’d topped happily, taught to bend to her desires but Carmilla, Carmilla she wanted to devour. The girl gave her submission without thinking and Laura’s hungry gaze was glued to the body writhing above her. She licked her lips and leaned forward, latching her mouth on Carmilla’s nipple and biting the hard flesh.

Carmilla started to shake, her sharp grunt at Laura’s bite just another noise she couldn’t stop, the fire in her belly threatening to overwhelm her. She could feel the sweat starting to bead between her shoulder blades at at her temples, could feel the ache in her thighs from driving her hips down onto Laura’s fingers. She was so close now, so close.

Laura knew Carmilla couldn’t last much longer, her fingers on Carmilla’s clit more insistent, the girl’s constant panting and groaning becoming more uneven.

“That’s it, that’s it my good girl. You want to come for me, want to please me, don’t you?”

Carmilla met Laura’s eyes, so close to losing her control completely.

“Unf, yes Laura.”

The blonde wanted to push her further.

“You’re going to come for me, aren’t you? You’re going to come all over my hand, riding my fingers, going to come like the good girl you are, right my sweet one? You’re going to come for me because I want it. Because your body is mine, isn’t it?”

Carmilla moaned wordlessly, Laura’s words directly impacting the orgasm threatening to crash down upon her. She nodded as best she could, her body lost to the motions of her hips.

“Come for me my good girl, show me your desire for me, show me how much your body is mine, under my control. Come for me _now_.”

The last word was spoken as a command and Carmilla could only comply. With a silent yell, she slammed her hips down on Laura’s fingers and began to shudder, her shaking muscles finally releasing the tension Laura had built up in her. Her vision went blurry and she sucked in deep lungfuls of air, attempting to keep the edges of her vision from going black.

Carmilla collapsed awkwardly on the couch, her tangled legs and bare ass across Laura’s lap, her face against the seat cushion.

Laura licked her fingers and hummed her approval, slapping Carmilla’s ass lightly with her other hand, a surprised moan coming from the girl sprawled across her. Laura placed a few more slaps on either cheek in front of her, watching Carmilla squirm delightfully under her hands.

“Mmm we’ll have to investigate that further later on, sweet one, everything your body gives me is so delicious.”

Carmilla turned her head so she could breathe, finding Laura looking down at her with unabashed desire.

“Ok.”

It was all she could croak out and Laura laughed, gently caressing the skin of Carmilla’s lower back.

“Now that we’ve sated my needy girl for a little while, you need to pack an overnight bag. And now that I know about them, wear those leather pants. And don’t bother putting anything on underneath. If you’re a very good girl tonight, you’ll be rewarded for it.”

Carmilla would follow the girl wherever she asked but- _where on Earth was Laura taking her?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading, and your comments! Makes my little queer heart pitter patter :-)


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Laura brings Carmilla to one of her places...

Carmilla sat on the couch in Laura’s living room, attempting not to squirm. The girl had disappeared into her bedroom with a wink, after making sure to let Carmilla know she was to stay put. She still had no idea what Laura’s plans were, but if the girl’s hands not too subtly parked in her back pockets all the way here were a clue, Carmilla was in for an interesting evening. Leather fetish, indeed. 

She looked around the room, the comfy couch she was sitting on, the shelves overflowing with books and an immaculate row of Doctor Who, Veronica Mars and Buffy season DVDs. She wasn’t surprised that Laura’s personal space was so cozy, the fluffy blanket over the back of her couch perfect for naps, the colors of the room mostly muted pastels. This side of Laura made just as much sense as the one who craved her submission. 

Carmilla couldn’t help but wonder what Laura’s bedroom looked like, which parts of her personality won out there. She played with the stitches on her pants and poked at her backpack with the toe of her black boots. 

She heard a thump from beyond the door and was about to call out to see if Laura was alright, but the door swung open and her jaw hit the floor. Laura looked- she looked unbelievable. 

Laura caught her immediate look of surprise and desire and smirked, folding her arms over her chest and leaning on the doorframe. 

“Like what you see, cutie?”

Carmilla picked her jaw back up, rolled her tongue back in her mouth and leered back. 

“That’s usually my line.”

Laura sauntered over to the couch, Carmilla’s eyes glued to the sheer black crop top Laura was wearing, the black bra underneath very on display, and her delightful legs were encased in a short dark red skirt that clung to her thighs.

“Damn, Hollis.”

She reached up for Laura, who tsk-ed and shook her head. 

“Not so fast, Karnstein. You want to put your hands on me, you’re going to have to wait a bit.”

Carmilla snorted. 

“And why would I do that to myself?”

Laura leaned forward, brushing Carmilla’s ear with her lips and whispered a few ideas that had Carmilla clutching the edge of the couch and suddenly out of breath. 

“O-ok.”

Laura straightened back up, the wicked grin across her face and a chuckle reverberating in her chest. Riling Carmilla up was just too much fun. 

“C’mon,  _Karnstein_ , shake a leg, the night is young!”

Carmilla looked at Laura’s form heading for the front door and between what Laura had just said and the girl’s incredible ass in that skirt, she’d quite lost her equilibrium and stumbled a bit getting off the couch, the ache forming deep in her belly only a precursor to the agony she knew she was going to endure tonight, for this girl.

She couldn’t wait, Laura made her feel  _alive_. 

—

The train ride to Laura’s mysterious destination was torture, the side looks from even unflappable New Yorkers doing nothing to quench the fire Laura was trying to consume her with. 

She couldn’t stop touching Carmilla, what would seem to be innocent touches, if the full length of her body hadn’t been pressed against the raven haired girl, Carmilla caught between her warm flesh and the cold steel of the train. Laura had maneuvered them into a corner of the older train, against the door to the next car and next to the wall of the conductor’s booth. The shorter girl didn’t turn her attention to anyone else but Carmilla, seemingly unconcerned that her actions might draw an eye. Only Carmilla faced the rest of the travelers, increasingly less able to keep the flush from her cheeks, though it was now from her desire and no longer her embarrassment. 

Laura looked to just be lovingly wrapped around Carmilla, but her hands and what they were doing was far from. Her left arm slung low around Carmilla’s back hid the hand that was deep in Carmilla’s back pocket, teasing and groping Carmilla’s ass, her right hand on Carmilla’s left hip, her thumb resting on the soft skin above the edge of her pants, rubbing in small circles that were starting to make Carmilla twitch. 

Laura’s head was nestled into her shoulder, her maddening fingers at their devilry, but any outward sign that she knew she was working Carmilla up so badly was absent, even with the things she kept saying casually. 

“You know they wish they were touching you.”

“Wish they could take your body the way I have."

“Had you wanting to submit to them like you want to submit to me. Even here, right now.”

Her breath tickled Carmilla’s throat and the taller girl couldn’t stop the hitch in her breathing, the trembling of her muscles; Laura’s words punctuated by the slow agonizing hand in her back pocket that was constantly massaging her ass, causing her already heated center to start noticeably leaking down her thigh. Thankfully so far only noticeable to her, but it was the most turned on she’d been in a long while and she knew relief was far, far away. Her mind reeled that she found herself in this position, Laura’s undeniable control of the situation something Carmilla would usually never acquiesce to.  

Laura hummed at Carmilla’s attempt at keeping her reactions subdued. Her power over the girl was intoxicating and she knew she could easily get lost in it. Fantasies of spinning Carmilla around and taking her right here against the wall of the train, her moans echoing down the carriage were attractive, but she had too much fun planned ahead to waste it getting arrested for making the girl cum in front of a few dozen strangers who didn’t deserve the sight. Working her up until she nearly exploded, however, was completely on the table. 

\--

The train slowed as it pulled into the station. Laura kissed Carmilla’s neck and pulled away from the girl, taking in and appreciating the level of extreme control the girl had been practicing; Carmilla’s skin was flushed, her lips parted while she tried to breathe out some of the tension built up in her body.

“You’re lucky this is our stop,” Laura said with a wink.

Carmilla attempted to move her legs and could feel the blood rush back into them, her first step a little unsteady. With so little effort, Laura had her off balance, but she knew at the same time Laura wouldn’t push her into anything that could get out of hand. She somehow knew exactly what edge to keep Carmilla on, teasing and torturing her, almost to the point where she’d start losing control, but not quite. Knowing Laura was going to be an exercise in endurance. She only hoped she was up to the challenge.

Laura led her above ground, taking hold of Carmilla’s left hand on the street, pulling the girl’s arm around her waist and holding it there for a second before dropping her own. Carmilla had no problem with the hint and pulled Laura to her as they walked. Laura wrapped her right arm around Carmilla, tucking her thumb into the waist of Carmilla’s leather pants. Laura rested her head on Carmilla’s shoulder for a moment before smiling up at the girl and continuing to walk down the block.

Laura kept showing her these moments, an absolute vixen one second, and now, the girl who wanted to show her affection in public. It warmed her heart; it had been such a long time since she had walked openly through the city with a girl. With Ell, everything had been hiding and secrecy. Even her attempts at dating afterward, having her arms around someone just felt off. Laura fit beside her like she was meant to be there.

They walked a few blocks away from the train station, and then Laura paused before a dark awning over a set of basement stairs. Across the fabric was printed “The Alchemy Club” in a rakish script and Carmilla quirked her eyebrow at Laura. 

“You bring me somewhere I’m going to get experiments done on me?”

Laura laughed. 

“Maybe.”

She held out her hand and Carmilla took it with only a joke at hesitating, Laura stuck her tongue out at the girl and pulled her enthusiastically down the stairs. 

—

The music hit Carmilla first, the deep thump of bass pressing close to her body as soon as they  entered the main room of the club, the small stage ahead being built up for a DJ, a carefully crafted nest of cords sprouting from a pretty elaborate set up. 

Laura pulled her toward the bar at the back wall, clearly well acquainted with their surroundings. She made a beeline for the one last stool and hopped up on it, pulling Carmilla between her legs. Carmilla couldn’t avoid noticing how that action dragged the edge of Laura’s skirt dangerously high up her thighs, her eyes widening, and she barely heard the girl chuckle as she leaned toward Carmilla’s ear. 

“You know I can’t  _not_  tease you a little, right? You have know what you do to me by now. Especially in those pants. Besides, as long as you stay between my legs, a place I like you at quite a bit, you can preserve this modesty you’re so  _worried about_.”

Carmilla shivered at Laura’s words, but her hands came to rest on Laura’s thighs, caressing up from her knees before settling right below the edge of Laura’s skirt. The girl hummed her approval into Carmilla’s ear and squeezed the taller girl’s hips with her knees. Carmilla tilted her mouth toward Laura’s ear. 

“What are we doing here, cupcake?”

“I’ve come here a few times, when I’ve gotten the chance to have a night out. I know the DJ, we lived together during undergrad for a while. So since I like to dance and she’s a good DJ, it works out quite well. I told her I’d come see her tonight, so why not bring you with me?”

Carmilla pulled back so she could look Laura in the eyes for a second before leaning back in.

“Cutie, don’t you think it’s going to ruin the mood a bit with your college roommate over my shoulder all night? If we start dancing, I’m not keeping my hands to myself.” 

She could feel the girl smirk against her cheek. 

“You will if you want any of what I said earlier to come true.”

Carmilla sucked in a quick breath. She had almost forgotten, but her hips twitched and Laura wrapped her arms around Carmilla’s waist, pulling Carmilla even closer, her hands on the girl’s thighs forced to continue their upward slide, the tips now underneath the edge of Laura’s skirt. She was grateful for the low lighting of the club and everyone else’s preoccupation with their own drinking and dancing. 

Laura put her lips to Carmilla’s ear. 

“Stay.”

Laura leaned back and twisted her upper body toward the bar, the cropped edge of her shirt lifting with her movement. Carmilla eyed the skin revealed appreciatively, her fingers unconsciously flexing against the girl’s skin. Laura caught the eye of the bartender and ordered for them both. Carmilla gave herself the time she had while Laura’s eyes were on the preparation of their drinks to let hers wander over the girl’s body. She knew they’d spent a bit of time naked together already, but Laura’s body was a marvel to her. All that taut but supple skin, lean muscle and the knowledge that powered it, just delicious. 

Carmilla took her drink from Laura as she turned back, knocking hers gently against Laura’s glass in a toast. A few cold water droplets fell from their glasses and rolled down the bare skin of Laura’s inner thigh, the girl flinching at the unexpected sensation. Carmilla couldn’t help but stop the path of the drops with her thumb, dragging it slowly in reverse back up the wet mark, very aware of the heat radiating off Laura’s skin. She finished wiping away the trail and placed her hand back on the top of Laura’s thigh, giving the girl’s leg a quick squeeze. She met Laura’s slightly lidded eyes and smirked at her before taking a drink of her whiskey. 

“Everything you do is so fucking sexy, Karnstein.”

“Glad you’re coming around to my way of thinking, poptart.” 

Laura took a swig of her tequila sour. 

“You’d better drink up, because once the set starts, we won’t be back to the bar until it’s done.”

—

They ended up having enough time for two and a half drinks, their flirting and innocent touching getting less so as the music and the libations continued. The room seemed to have gotten even darker, Carmilla forced to wedge herself deeper between Laura’s legs due to the press of the increase in bodies in the room, though neither of them complained. 

Carmilla’s hand not holding her now third drink had worked its way along the outside of Laura’s thigh, up under her skirt and was nearly palming the girl’s ass, her constant featherlight touches on the girl’s skin with her fingertips drawing several shivers from the smaller girl. 

Both girls were a bit beyond tipsy, but still not sure if it was their chemistry or the alcohol that had infused the night with a glow. The rest of the world had faded to the space they had created for each other and the constant thump of bass now only echoed their pulses. 

“That is not how you got that scar. Now you’re just lying to me.” 

Carmilla laughed and nuzzled Laura’s ear with her nose. 

“I’m not, really! She didn’t even notice the golf cart had started to move, she was riding me so hard. So I grabbed her and bailed, cut my arm as we landed, and managed to apparently hit just the right angle because she came all over me at the same time. Golf cart ended up in the pond...and we made a run for it.”

Laura’s eyes were murky with her desire, but her laugh was still that same open sound that made Carmilla’s entire body sing. They’d been trading steadily dirtier stories and Carmilla was thankful she had quite a few, impressing Laura made Laura laugh, and that was a sound she couldn’t imagine getting tired of.

Suddenly the lights dimmed and then strobes started up, Laura’s eyes darting to the stage with excitement. She immediately downed her drink, bumped Carmilla’s arm to indicate she should do the same, and after the girl complied, she pushed Carmilla back, hopped off the stool and dragged Carmilla into the sea of bodies, pushing toward the dance floor. Carmilla could only follow, her hand tight in Laura’s grip. 

“Alright everybody,” a voice sounded. “Finally what you’ve been waiting for, tonight at The Alchemy Club,  _DJ Speelz_!”

The crowd gave an appreciative roar, and the DJ approached her set up, pumping one fist in the air. She wasted no time manipulating the board in front of her and her mixed version of Bishop Brigg’s “River” poured from the speakers, bodies immediately grooving to the thump of syncopated beats.   

Laura’s eyes lit up and she pulled Carmilla’s hips to her own, throwing her arms around the girl’s shoulders and pulling her ear close. 

“Hope you can keep up Karnstein.”

She started slowly gyrating her hips against Carmilla’s, her lower lip caught between her teeth, running one hand through her hair and Carmilla wasn’t sure she’d ever seen anything sexier. Laura’s body became the music, drawing her in. Her hands slipped to Laura’s waist and she began to move with Laura, picking up the rhythm, finding the blonde grinning at her. By the time the beat dropped, they were lost in each other’s bodies and the easy way they moved together, both flashing to moments the night before when they’d first found how well they fit.

Carmilla smirked as Laura hooked a finger into Carmilla’s vest and sang the chorus at her, a rather impure sparkle in her eye. 

 

 _Shut your mouth, baby stand and deliver_  
_Holy hands, oh they make me a sinner_  
_Like a river, like a river_  
_Shut your mouth and run me like a river_

 

Laura brought her upper body close to Carmilla and gave her a short but searing kiss before turning her body around and pressing back into the girl, pulling Carmilla’s hands around to palm her stomach. She wanted the girl's hands on her too much right now to worry about her earlier orders.  

Carmilla stifled a groan as she felt Laura’s ass against her, the ache in her body growing. She tightened her arms around Laura and met her movements, her hands on Laura’s bare stomach starting to wander between the hem of the girl’s skirt and her rib cage, the smaller girl’s hands coming up to tangle in Carmilla’s hair as she ground her body into the girl behind her. 

Carmilla caught glimpses of other dancers through her haze, quite a few other queer couples lost in each other as much as she and Laura were and she relaxed further into the experience, allowing herself to imprint everything about this moment. The scent of Laura’s shampoo and her skin where Carmilla’s nose was buried in her neck, the thin film of sweat on the girl’s stomach underneath her hands, the excruciatingly delicious way she was moving her hips, accentuating the bass line with a particular twist that made something in Carmilla want to growl. The confidence Laura had in her body was evident, how she moved through the music as much as with it, unconcerned with anything but being in the moment with Carmilla. The girl was utterly intoxicating. She pressed a kiss against Laura’s neck and lost herself in the music. 

They danced together through most of the set, the DJ’s song choices steadily increasing in intensity, holding the crowd in an electric place, flushed faces and sweat covered bodies moving together, tensions and desires a current running through them all. 

The DJ was currently spinning a dirty, grungy mix of Jetta’s “I’d Love To Change The World”, the room only breathing when the DJ let them, brief moments in the downbeat where Carmilla could remember there was something outside of the constant thump of her heart and the answering one in her core, her and Laura’s heated bodies pressed together, their foreheads touching and hips constantly matching the other’s movements. 

Laura’s eyes were blown with her desire, her hands pressed against Carmilla’s bare skin under her shirt, feeling the muscles of the girl’s back flexing as she controlled her hips. Dancing was one of her favorite things in existence, but it had never been like this before. The girl in front of her hadn’t once faltered in her match of Laura, had even surprised her with a few moves, her hands on Laura making the girl’s skin flame. 

Laura could feel the energy in the room pulsing as the music shifted again, the deep bass notes vibrating her bones. She lifted her head and looked at Carmilla, the girl’s flushed skin, the damp hair at the edge of her forehead causing her bangs to stick up a little, the smirk across her lips and hooded eyes. How much she wanted this girl was undeniable, but the connection she felt went deeper than that. 

The DJ held up one finger, signaling the last song of the set. The room hung waiting in the bridge. The DJ grabbed a mic. 

“Just for you guys, because how could I fucking not?”

She flipped a switch in front of her and the bridge faded into opening notes that caused a huge grin to race across Laura’s face and she turned toward the stage, yelling at the top of her lungs. 

“ _Fuck yes, Spielsdorf!_ ”

The DJ’s head snapped up and she found Laura in the crowd and grinned, throwing her a thumbs up before going back to her board. 

The bassed out remix of Janelle Monae’s “Make Me Feel” came charging out of the speakers and Laura grabbed at Carmilla, pulling their bodies together and grinning at the girl. She sang along to the song, putting every bit of her remaining energy into the dance, Carmilla’s badly held back groans the sign she wanted to see, she wanted to leave no guesswork about her intentions with the girl and the rush she felt around her. 

Carmilla was losing herself in the music but her body wouldn’t stop moving with Laura’s, the ache that had built for the girl over the course of the evening was at a roar, constantly clawing at the underside of her skin. She felt like she’d been dancing inside of a battery, both drained and electrified. 

Carmilla looked at the girl she was dancing with, sweat dripping along her hairline, chest heaving as she sang, skirt hiked up as she straddled Carmilla’s leather-clad thigh, one hand curled and fisting the hem of Carmilla’s shirt, the other in the air. Her face was a study in pleasure, she looked just so genuinely happy Carmilla’s breath caught. It was only a moment before Laura switched their positions, pressing her back against Laura’s front and the wave of the music picked her up again and flung her back into the maelstrom. 

—          

“Do you need to say goodbye to your friend?”

Laura handed two dollars to the guy at the cart and then passed a bottle of water to Carmilla, shaking her head. 

“No, I’ll see Betty on Tuesday, we always go for cookies.”

Carmilla took a few gulps of her water, her body still humming with the energy of the night. They began to move away from the club entrance, other sweat soaked dancers taking their leave into the mild spring evening.  

Laura smirked over at her between sips of water. 

“I’m pretty impressed Karnstein, you got moves.”

Carmilla felt her cocky smile slide back into place. She walked Laura backwards up against the brick wall behind the shorter girl and dipped her head low, kissing underneath Laura’s jaw. she bit at the rapid pulse she found underneath Laura's skin and was rewarded with a stifled moan. 

“Yeah, Hollis? I’m pretty sure the damp spots on my leathers can attest to that.”

Laura wrapped her arms around Carmilla’s waist under her vest and pulled the girl closer, rocking her hips against Carmilla’s. 

“Mmm, you did make me pretty wet Karnstein, we should explore that further."

Carmilla growled. 

“Right here, cutie? Didn’t know you had it in you.”

“Mm, as much as I’m definitely for adventures, I’ve got plans for what I want where.”

Carmilla’s center throbbed and she held tight to Laura’s hips, her words low and husky. 

“Lead on.”

Laura pushed Carmilla back playfully and arched an eyebrow. 

"You just want to be able to watch my ass."

Carmilla grinned, no ounce of shame in her reply.

"Yes, ma'am I definitely do."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much you guys for the comments, they've really meant an incredible amount to me :-)
> 
> This one didn't flow too well out of my head, I may come back and clean it up a bit, but the next chapter is pretty smooth in comparison, woo.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Laura makes good on her secretive whispers and Carmilla gets a phone call.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all.
> 
> Sorry this took longer than anticipated, my direct supervisor and our HR person attempted a coup in our shop steward elections at work last week so dealing with their black holes of negative energy has wiped out the whole damn office, and my team is just exhausted having to play in suddenly crazy land, hasn’t been awesome for writing headspace, that’s for sure. It was the most ridiculous thing I'd ever seen happen in a meeting. Unreal. 
> 
> Aaaaanyway.
> 
> Here's a new bit, extra chock full of smut and a wee bit of angst. 
> 
> More life outside the bedroom after this for a while, but Hollstein are themselves, so those little magnets will have something to say about it I'm sure. 
> 
> Hope you all enjoy! Thanks again for the comments and reading through!

“Ready for this, my good girl?”

Carmilla couldn’t help the small moan that escaped her throat and she nodded at Laura, who pushed the button to the elevator. Laura’s teasing on the train had been entirely word bound, whispered descriptions of what the girl had in store for her, directions for what Laura wanted her to do flowing into her ear the entirety of the ride back to Laura’s apartment. Other than the hand that drew lazy patterns on her leather clad thigh, Laura had been quite relaxed, her head resting on Carmilla’s shoulder between her torturous missives. 

Laura pressed Carmilla against the wall of the elevator, slipping her thigh between Carmilla’s and kissing up her neck. Carmilla shuddered, her hands coming up, one to tangle in Laura’s hair, the other to fist into the fabric of the crop top in the middle of her back. The girl could turn her legs to jelly with a touch, and kept finding new ways to unknowingly prove it.

“Laura, can you tell what this does to me? You just look at me and I want to give it all up. I know you won’t hurt me, not with this, what you demand of me.”

Laura kissed her roughly and cupped her cheek.

“Fuck, Carm, I think your trust is the sexiest thing.”

She bit Carmilla’s lip and kissed her again.

“I know we should be adults at some point and actually talk about this, but right now I just want to get you naked and underneath me.” 

“I’m good with that,” Carmilla panted out. “So, so good with that.”

The elevator dinged Laura’s floor and the two fell out of the car together, unable or unwilling to separate. They stumbled, getting lost in messy tongue filled kisses, pinning each other against various bits of the hallway as they moved toward Laura’s door. Laura fumbled as she tried to get her keys in the door, Carmilla’s hands sneaking up the back of her thighs to grab her ass not helping her coordination.

“Karnstein.”

The name was growled out, heavy with desire. Carmilla didn’t recognize the whine that left her mouth, but she dropped her hands all the same.

“Mm good,” Laura said as she got the door open. “Now get going.”

Carmilla’s pulse began to race, her desire clouded judgement weakening a bit in the darkened apartment. Laura noticed her hesitation as she turned on a small lamp by the door and wrapped her arms around Carmilla from behind, tucking her nose into the nape of Carmilla’s neck. Carmilla felt her speak against her skin as much as heard.

“You trust me, right?”

Carmilla nodded and rasped out a “Yes”.

“And you know all I want is for you to feel good, right?”

Carmilla nodded again, Laura’s hands wandering to stroke the skin of her stomach under her shirt.

“And you want this, of your own mind?”

Carmilla nodded again. “Oh yes.”

“Then let go into the feeling, let that hesitation go. Give me that control and you don’t have to worry about it anymore.”

Laura’s hands had moved to cup Carmilla’s breasts as she spoke, a sharp intake of breath from Carmilla causing a cocky smile to cross her face. 

“There you go, my sweet girl. You know you want this, your body is showing you how much you do. I bet if I touched your pussy you’d be drenched right now, wouldn’t you, baby?”

Carmilla flushed, a mix of the shorter girl’s words and her excellent fingers causing the groan to escape from her mouth.

“That’s all the yes I need, my sweet girl. You’re going to go do what I want now, aren’t you? Going to go put yourself on display for me, yes?”

Laura bit the muscle of Carmilla’s back and another groan left the body in front of her.

“That’s right. Now go on, get that ass into my bedroom, I expect you to be ready for me.”

With that she gave Carmilla’s shoulder a kiss and moved her hands around to playfully shove Carmilla toward the bedroom door.

—

Carmilla was dripping. She could feel it, rivulets of her desire working their way slowly down the inside of her thighs, soaking into the leather of her pants leg. It had been about ten minutes since Laura had sent her into the bedroom and the waiting was making her heart start to race and her pulse quicken. While she knew a bit of what Laura wanted, the anticipation alone had her body on edge to be touched.

She was on all fours on Laura’s low bed, her feet off the edge. Laura had instructed her to take everything off but her leather pants. She realized her chest was heaving and attempted to slow her breathing, let the haze she was losing herself in dissipate a bit. It was more difficult than she anticipated, the culmination of almost two days now of being around this firebrand of a woman, who then just spent the last several hours very openly grinding into her on a dance floor, was hard to distance herself from. But then why should she? They were two very consenting adults, and this woman had her coming in ways she didn’t want to ever forget happened.

Carmilla tried to press her legs together to alleviate the ache that thought brought and a chuckle came from the doorway behind her.

“My sweet girl, I do expect you’re feeling a bit needy by now,  _aren’t you_?”

Carmilla groaned. “You could say that.”

She jumped as she felt Laura’s hands running up the backs of her legs, settling on the curve of her ass.

“Twitchy, are we my girl? Or maybe you just don’t want me to do what I said I would, don’t want to feel what I’ll make you feel, where I’ll bring you?”

Her voice was light, teasing, the thumbs of her hands starting to make small, soft circles over the leather, slowly getting closer to the seam of Carmilla’s pants, pressed tight to Carmilla’s center.

The taller girl dropped her head to the bedding in front of her, groaning into the fabric.

“Oh no, Laura, oh I do. I do.”

Laura chuckled again, her thumbs just brushing the edge of the seam, Carmilla sucked in a quick breath, the tease of the girl’s touch through the leather torturous.

“Good, because that means i get to keep enjoying your ass in these  _pants_.”

Laura absently ghosted her fingers along the seam as she spoke, Carmilla’s hips jerking forward. She was almost vibrating with the need for this to go somewhere, to be cast in the flame, to have Laura fulfill all those promises she had whispered hours before but she knew Laura wouldn’t be that kind, that quick to give her the release she wanted.

“Needy, needy girl.” Laura continued her merciless tease, well aware of how Carmilla had started to pant, even if the girl hadn’t. She knew she was back playing with that razor’s edge, holding her own desire back, the deep growl of how much she wanted to own the woman in front of her constantly scrabbling to get out of the cage she kept it hidden away in. She knew she had to keep focus, remember that Carmilla wasn’t hers, no matter the connection they had ignited in so short a time.

She shook her head to clear her mind of thoughts that weren’t of use, breathing in slow deep breaths, taking in the strong scent of the warm leather under her hands, the gentle smell of Carmilla’s skin, the heady smell of her desire, tangy and rich. She flexed her hands against Carmilla’s ass and was rewarded with a low short moan, and a cocky smile slid into place. The girl so easily responded to her, followed her lead and desires, this really was going to be  _fun_.

Laura cracked her neck and took a step closer to Carmilla, her hands moving to slide up Carmilla’s back, before she slid them back down, barely touching the sides of her rib cage and rested them again against Carmilla’s ass. She was careful to not touch Carmilla with her body, she wanted the girl on edge and waiting for her.

“Tell me, my girl. Tell me what you agreed to. I want to hear it out of that sweet mouth. Tell me what you’re going to come doing, what filthy things my girl got so wet and twisted up over. I want to hear you, sweet one.”

Carmilla groaned into the comforter and fisted the material. Was this girl really going to make her say it? She sucked in a breath before attempting to admit to what she was about to. Out loud. On all fours with a gorgeous,  _masterful_  woman who had her near trembling with want, standing ready.

“Y-you said you wanted to-”

“Oh, no no, my sweet one. We only use “I statements” here. Take ownership of it. What dirty things do you want to have happen to you? What had you gripping the edge of the couch and pressing your legs together like I wouldn’t see?”

Carmilla swore and Laura chuckled. She slowly massaged Carmilla’s delightfully curved ass.

“Try again, sweet thing.”

Carmilla knew the words were Laura’s, but the ideas that had been whispered still set her ablaze, but no one had ever made her admit it before now. She knew that this was a moment, either to give in and let Laura tempt her into fulfilling a few of her closely guarded fantasies, or decide it was all too much. She felt a shiver race down her spine as Laura gripped just a little bit harder and she knew she really, really wanted this. Cheeks burning, she tried again.

“I-I want you to,” she cleared her throat, and Laura gave a gentle encouraging squeeze, “I want you to spank me until I’m dripping and begging you to take me.”

Laura purred.

“My good girl, I know that wasn’t easy for you, you did so well.”

Carmilla moaned as Laura suddenly moved and cupped her mound through the leather pants, flicking a finger over the zipper and dragging her fingernail up and down the metal strip, each tooth sending a tiny reverberation straight to Carmilla’s core.

“There’s only one tiny thing wrong with the end. You never specified how. A girl has to have clear directions, if she’s going to decide to give you what you desire. How do you want me to take you?”

She continued to toy with the zipper, the heel of her hand pressing into Carmilla’s clit. The girl was so thankful and so frustrated by the action. She needed movement, she needed friction, she needed more. More meant giving in completely.

“I want you to fuck me with your c-cock.”

Laura began to flex her wrist, giving Carmilla just a sliver of what she needed.

“Until?” She slid her free hand up and around, pinching Carmilla’s nipple lightly.

“Oh-oh fuck, Laura, until I cream all over it, all over you, buried in me.”

Laura let out what sounded like a growl and reached for the tab of Carmilla’s zipper, pulling it down quickly.

“And you’re going to look so  _goddamn beautiful_  doing it.”

She tugged the leather pants off Carmilla’s hips, bunching them around her knees before she pulled them off and tossed them to the floor. She turned back to a mouthwatering sight that made her ravenous. Carmilla was absolutely soaked, the inside of her thighs slick, her arousal suddenly all Laura could smell. She dipped her head as close to the girl’s pussy as she could without touching and breathed in deeply. Carmilla’s lips were already swollen and puffy; as she marveled in the smell of the girl she watched a lone drop of arousal slide past Carmilla’s clit and soak into her already damp curls. Delicious. She let go her breath and Carmilla’s hips twitched as the air tickled her sensitive skin. Laura took another deep lungful and hummed in pleasure.

“That would be,” she gently bit Carmilla’s ass, as the girl sucked in a surprised breath, “exactly the perfect scent for you. Warm leather, your sandalwood soap and all this fucking wet.”

She pulled back and ran her hands across the globes of Carmilla’s ass, softly massaging the skin. The dark haired girl let out a happy sigh and relaxed into Laura’s touch. Her nervousness was receding. Though she’d never experienced what she was about to, she wanted to so badly with Laura, wanted the confident and deft hands on her to usher in that experience, secure in the knowledge that Laura would be there to catch her, even if she was about to shove her gleefully off the cliff, too.

“Sweet one, all this pale flesh is going to be so many colors when I’m done with it.” Laura palmed the skin in front of her and dug her nails in lightly, feeling Carmilla’s answering shiver. She moved forward, lining her hips up behind Carmilla. The edge of Laura’s lips curved upward into a smirk and she wet them with her tongue. It was time.

Carmilla felt the girl behind her still, and her muscles tensed slightly. She felt Laura move and then there was something hard and warm sliding along her slit, stopping when it nudged her clit. She was confused for a second before she realized. Laura’s cock. She groaned and her hips twitched backward.

Laura chuckled. “Yes my good girl. This will be all for you.” She slowly rocked her hips, running the length of the shaft through Carmilla’s folds and bumping her clit with each pass. Laura let the girl underneath her enjoy the sensations, her eyes glued to how the cock glistened each time she pulled back.Carmilla attempted to hold in the whine that was starting to build in her throat, Laura’s teasing of her overheated core already starting to propel her towards her undoing, far sooner than she wanted.

“I want to hear you, sweet one. Let it all out.”

Carmilla gripped the sheets and bent her head forward, whimpering loudly.

“ _Fuck_ , Laura,” she husked, sweat dampened hair falling against her face, “You keep doing that and this is going to be very far sooner than either of us will be happy with. I don’t think you understand what you do to me. And I-I need to feel you.”

Laura laughed darkly and gave her hips one quick snap and then pulled back slowly, removing her cock from between Carmilla’s legs, the girl sighing in a mix of disappointment and gratitude at the loss of contact.

“We can’t have that sweet girl, I need to feel you too. I’ll make you a compromise. Ill give you what you want, if you can count to ten for me.”

“Count to ten?”

“Mhm.” Laura moved closer to Carmilla again, and teased the already wet head of her cock at the girl’s entrance.

Carmilla panted. She wanted it all, wanted Laura’s burning hands on her the way she’d promised, but the feeling of Laura’s cock nudging at her threw everything to the back of her head and all she could focus on was how Laura would feel, finally sheathed inside her. She wasn’t sure she knew what ten was.

Laura could see that the girl’s focus was wavering, the edge she’d kept Carmilla on starting to short circuit her brain.

“Stay with me sweet one, all you want will be yours. I need you here with me for just a little longer and then I promise im going to fuck you how you crave me to.”

Carmilla moaned at Laura’s words and she shook her head to clear her thoughts.

“I can count to ten, I can,” she let out, knowing the words came from her mouth, but not recognizing the whining plea in her tone.

“I know you can my beautiful girl, and you will. For every count, I’ll take what I want, and I’ll give you what you want. So, count for me.”

Carmilla took a breath in, knowing what was coming and also not knowing at all.

“One.”

She felt Laura’s hand fall on her right cheek and sucked in a breath, hearing the smack of skin ricochet in the small room. She moaned, she sharp feeling contrasting with the push of Laura’s cock against her and the slow tortuous feeling of her cunt stretching delightfully around the thick head. She knew Laura could slip in easily, her drenched pussy no hindrance for Laura’s cock, but she also knew the girl was going to draw out the sensation as much as possible.

“Oh fuck, Laura. Two.”

Carmilla couldn’t stop the grunt that escaped her mouth as Laura’s left hand left a resounding crack against her skin, her cunt clutching at the tip of Laura’s cock at the surprise of the spank, feeling Laura feed her the next inch or so as the head pushed past her fluttering muscles and sunk into her. She could hear Laura’s rough breathing, thankful she wasn’t the only one made a little ragged by the experience.

“Three.”

Another smack of hand against flesh and Carmilla moaned, could feel the red heat of her skin where Laura’s handprint must certainly be and the continued achingly slow thrust of Laura’s hips. She could feel the thickness of Laura’s cock now, stretching her wider than her fingers, or anyone else’s, had. She didn’t know why she’d waited so long to experience this.

“You feel so fucking good sweet one, so fucking good around my cock. Unf, I wish you could see yourself, hips tilted up to meet me, my fucking cock in you and that pale sweet skin turning red under my hands.”

Carmilla dipped her head at Laura’s words, her hips jogging unconsciously, attempting to draw Laura in further, continue the aching burn that was centered around her body’s swiftly growing need to be fucked, to dispense with the torture and have Laura’s hands grip her hips tightly and drive into her, over and over until she truly understood what it was like to be taken, to let Laura rut into her until she came apart completely.

Laura swatted at the skin in front of her, the light smack against Carmilla’s thigh a gentle warning.

“I know how badly you want this, but remember sweet one. Not following my instructions means all this ends and we both go hungry. So think about what you’re willing to risk.”

Carmilla took a deep breath and focused on keeping herself still, but how could she be expected to have no reaction when Laura was doing what she was doing?

“Four.”

Laura grunted and the sound of flesh meeting flesh under her hands sent another bolt of electricity down her spine. She pushed her hips forward and sunk further into Carmilla, steeling her control and desire. The visual of Carmilla’s pulsing pink lips stretched around the shaft of her cock was intoxicating and she could feel the inner grip of the girl’s muscles, the tremble of holding her own desire back; Laura knew she could lose herself in it too easily, get drunk in a second on this eager girl under her hands, how absolutely soaked she was, how willing, how vulnerable. A snarl of possessiveness fought to erupt from her throat and she bit it back harshly, a choked grunt escaping instead.

Five through nine rushed past Carmilla, the throb of her reddened skin fading into the background of her raw need, Laura was nearly buried fully inside her but the lack of friction was driving her insane, she was a live wire, fizzing with unspent energy. Laura’s cock felt exquisite, stretching her in delicious ways she hadn’t imagined were possible. Her cock was on a course to reach a somewhere Carmilla knew no one had been before and she couldn’t stop the full body shiver that rippled through her at the thought.

Laura chuckled at the sight and barely rocked her hips forward; Carmilla moaned into the bedsheets.

“One more my sweet girl. One more, and you’ll have taken all of me. You look so sexy right now, taking me so well. I can feel you gripping me, don’t think I can’t feel how badly you want this, those muscles squeezing around me so delightfully.”

Carmilla raised her head from the sheets, her mouth opening to reply but all that she could manage was a groan of admission.

“Have to count out the last one, my beautiful girl. I love how wet you are for me, sweet one, your cunt dripping around my cock. I can’t wait to see how much you’ll gush by the time I’m done with you.”

Carmilla whimpered at Laura’s voice, that dangerous velvet tone cranking the buzzing in her bones to dangerous levels. She needed Laura to fuck her, and she needed to do it now.

She growled out a “Ten,” and hissed in pleasure as the last of Laura’s countdown concluded and her hand fell to Carmilla’s skin, a satisfying pink handprint left behind. Carmilla felt the shift of Laura’s hips and the last inch of Laura slid home inside her and she let out a low long moan.

“Oh fuck, Laura, you feel so incredible.” She felt lightheaded as her body adjusted to the full length of Laura, the thickness an almost-too-much that she knew she was going to learn to crave far too quickly.

“Let me know when you’re ready my good girl. I know I’m a bit bigger than you’d think on first glance.” Laura chuckled at her own joke but kept herself controlled enough to still her hips, even though the thick haze of her desire wanted nothing more than to claim Carmilla for her own, to rut into the girl until they both crashed off the edge of the world.

Carmilla’s ass was reddened equally, Laura pressed flush against the heated skin; she could feel Carmilla’s continued arousal leaking around her cock, could feel it starting to slick her own thighs and she growled quietly, pleased with the effect she was having on Carmilla.

The raven haired girl was attempting to even out her breathing, her head still spinning with how incredibly turned on but just as equally frustrated she was. She was absolutely ready, beyond ready. She rocked her hips back and heard Laura’s quick gasp, following it with one of her own as the head of Laura’s cock nudged somewhere that made her knees tremble.

“Oh fuck, Carm.” Laura’s voice cracked and lost the seductive edge it had carried, a note of awe and surprise replacing the velvet. She knew from the moment she’d whispered the words into Carmilla’s ear earlier that seeing herself actually buried in the girl’s cunt was going to be beyond her wildest imagining, but this was almost too much. Her hips stuttered as she tried to control the surge of adrenaline and lust that ran through her, her hands moving to grip Carmilla’s hips, the touch helping to ground her. She’d nudged that same place again in her movement and Carmilla was panting.

“Laura. Stop teasing me and fuck me.”

Laura tightened her grip and slowly drew her hips back until just the head of her cock was nestled inside Carmilla. The muscles in her thighs twitched, her cock wet with arousal and the sight of Carmilla’s folds split by the shaft was intoxicating. But she wasn’t going to give in quite yet. Carmilla had to complete her part in this.

“Sweet one, that’s not how it works. Remember your words.”

Carmilla blinked and drew her thoughts back together. Oh. Oh. The list of things she would do to get Laura to start pounding into her was growing longer by the second, begging was too easy.

“Please, Laura. Please fuck me.  _For the love of Lophii, just_ take _me_.”

She groaned inwardly at how needy she sounded but she only had a second to contemplate it before Laura started moving and her world exploded in sparks.

Laura tightened her hands on Carmilla’s hips and sunk her cock into the girl, both of their moans mixing. She pulled back and started a fluid rhythm, her hips solidly connecting with Carmilla’s ass each time she bottomed out and the quick breath it inspired from the other girl as it brushed that same spot caused her own clit to throb against the harness.

They moved together, Carmilla arching her back and pushing herself against Laura’s thrusts, the low pull in her belly becoming a quickly growing fire. She tightened her fingers in the comforter and yelled her pleasure into the ceiling, her desire sky high but also suddenly tickled by the fact that this was somehow her evening. A grin crossed her face as she threw her weight back harder against Laura, the girl’s approving grunt sending a fresh wave of liquid to run around the shaft of Laura’s cock. The smile was suddenly wiped away to be replaced by a look of bliss as the harder answering thrust brushed inside her and left her moaning.

Laura started to pick up the pace, watching Carmilla’s ass bounce against her abs while her cock disappeared in and out of the sexiest girl she’d ever seen was shredding her control completely. Carmilla submitting under her hands so easily had her itching against the rougher parts of herself that wanted to throw caution to the winds.

She reached forward and put her left hand on Laura’s shoulder, using her new leverage to pull the girl down onto her cock while she used her core to propel her hips forward. Carmilla’s moans became unintelligible words until she sucked in a deep breath.

“More, Laura, please more. So, so good.” Carmilla arched further, feeling the slap of Laura’s hips against her with each thrust. Her orgasm was flying at her but she wanted, needed just a little bit more. She reached for the hand on her shoulder and pulled, Laura letting her lead the hand away while still not losing her punishing rhythm. Carmilla laced her fingers with Laura’s for a second before moving the hand and wrapping it around her own throat. She tensed and held her hand still.

“Oh, fuck.” Laura growled deep in her chest, her clit throbbing painfully. This girl.  _This girl_. She had never met someone who offered their submission so willingly, so innocently.

Laura gently flexed her hand around Carmilla’s throat and the loud moan that left Carmilla’s mouth caused her hips to stutter, cock jittering strokes against the girl. She huffed out a quick ragged breath and tightened her hold on Carmilla’s hip, her fingers digging into the pale flesh. Good chance Carmilla would carry evidence of this night for a few days but the thought of her marks on the girl only spurred on her need to claim, even if only for now.

Carmilla felt Laura’s hand tighten further around the column of her neck, felt the pressure starting to squeeze just right, the burn and ache of Laura’s hips driving her cock deep inside her a ride she was being swept away on. She tilted her hips further and at Laura’s grunted curses, put her entire weight into meeting each pummeling thrust, her walls starting to seize and clamp down on the slick heat of Laura’s shaft. She got lost in the beautifully brutal sensation, her body alive, electrified. The wildfire in her core was becoming almost unmanageable.

She gasped in the air she was allowed by Laura’s grip and tried to form words.

“So close, Laura, I’m close.”

She heard Laura groan throatily and her tempo sped up even more, her thrusts started to lose their carefully controlled movement, becoming rougher and a little wild. The hand wrapped around her neck let go and Carmilla found her upper body being pulled back toward Laura, her arm now wrapped across Carmilla’s chest, her hand palming her right breast, holding the girl to her.

Laura was clinging desperately to the last vestiges of her control, Carmilla’s words and her continued moans and gasps propelling her forward. Her own clit was throbbing terribly, the continued friction of the harness had her thighs trembling and she knew she wouldn’t let herself come before Carmilla, but it was going to be close. Pulling the girl to her and changing the angles of their bodies, she forfeited her deep strokes for shorter, more powerful thrusts that painted the pulsing walls of Carmilla’s pussy in a way that had the girl’s eyes rolling back and stole her breath away.

“Come for me my sweet one, come around my cock, let go and ride that feeling. You’re so beautiful right now, your cunt holding tight to me, pulling me in, I can feel you baby, feel how badly you needed this, needed me to fill you up. Let go sweet girl, come for me.”

Carmilla tried to pull her hazy focus to Laura’s words, but through the raging fire of her impending orgasm all she caught was Laura imploring her to let go. Her hands flew to the arm holding her tight across her front, her fingers digging into Laura’s skin as her head fell back and she yelled her release to the world. The tidal wave of her peak sparked into a wall she couldn’t escape and her whole body began to seize and twitch; her legs trembled and gave out, causing her to fall forward, Laura’s entwined body dragged along.

As she landed she felt Laura’s noise of surprise before the girl’s form was stretched across her back, both of them yelling intelligible words together as Laura’s cock was driven further into Carmilla by her weight, igniting a second smaller orgasm in Carmilla and tearing Laura off on her own.

They shook and moaned and cursed together, both bodies sweat slicked with their exertions. Laura slowed her hips to a gentle rock and brought them both back down, her cheek pressed between Carmilla’s shoulder blades, the deep lungfuls of air she attempted to draw perfumed with the smell of their mixed arousal.

Carmilla twitched through the aftershocks Laura’s cock was still drawing from her, suddenly bone deep exhausted and sated in a way she hadn’t thought possible. She stretched an arm behind her and grabbed onto the first bit of Laura’s flesh she could reach, cupping a hand to the muscular ass that had just pounded the utter hell out of her. She squeezed the curve of muscle and a satisfied rumble vibrated through Laura’s chest and into hers. Laura’s weight pushed her into the bed but it felt calming before anything else, it felt right, resting under the powerful woman who had just driven her to ground shaking orgasms and fulfilled one of her deepest held desires. 

Laura let out a shaky breath and let her hips still, her body still riding small waves of pleasure. Her muscles were jelly and she knew she should get off Carmilla, but this felt too right, too good, buried deep in the girl, curved over her form, her left arm still wrapped around Carmilla’s chest and pinned under their combined weight. She felt entirely at peace.

Carmilla let out a tiny whimper as she felt Laura relax, the last of her aftershocks receding.

“Wow.”

It came out muffled against the comforter, and Carmilla huffed a breath to get the hair out of her face.

“Wow indeed, sweet one.”

Laura pressed a kiss to the skin under her resting cheek. Carmilla sighed contentedly and closed her eyes, blinking them back open after a long moment, the feeling of her and Laura’s matched breathing starting to lull her to sleep. She attempted to stretch but only succeeded in impaling herself a little bit further on Laura’s cock and the girl’s quick hiss matched her surprised gasp.

“Ok, maybe we should...”

Laura chuckled.

“I don’t know, I could get used to this nice fluffy pillow I have under me.”

She felt Carmilla wriggle her shoulders and laughed, using her right hand to lift some of her weight off the girl underneath her. Carmilla raised herself enough for Laura to withdraw her arm, which was placed then at the base of her spine.

“Ready?”

Carmilla bit her lip, knowing she would instantly miss both Laura’s cock and her calming weight, but knowing they couldn’t stay this way forever.

“As long as this isn’t the only time you’re going to fuck me like that.”

Laura grunted and started shifting her hips back, Carmilla’s inner muscles still clutching to her shaft. They moaned together as Laura slipped free, the heavy head of her cock landing with a wet slap against the back of Carmilla’s thigh.

“Fuck, Carm. Of course not. You damn well better believe we’re not done here. It’s a fucking good thing I’m always hard because I still have plans for that sweet cunt of yours.”

Carmilla shivered but made a sound of happy agreement.

“Rest first though, at least for a little bit. I can’t feel my legs.”

Laura leaned forward and kissed each side of Carmilla’s reddened ass gently.

“As the lady wishes.”

—

Carmilla opened her eyes groggily, thrown by the loud noises coming from her phone...somewhere. She sat up and rubbed her face, trying to pinpoint the location.

“Kill it with a sword!”

Carmilla turned and saw a grumpy face looking up at her from under a mess of blonde hair.

“I’m sorry, I don’t know where it ended up.”

Laura grunted and pulled the pillow over her head, trying to hide from the noise. Carmilla slipped off the bed toward where she thought she had put her shoes last night and found her phone blaring Too Many Zoo’s “The Block”. Dropping down next to them, she clawed the phone out of her shoe and looked at the screen.

Mattie. Why in the hell was Mattie calling her this fucking early?

“You do know what time it is, right?”

“Good morning to you too, kitty cat. You can put those little claws away, it’s after nine and some of us are responsible adults who actually do things with their Sunday mornings.”

“Not me,” she yawned. “So what’s up?”

“Well, my favorite sister, I learned something earlier today I thought you would appreciate the heads up about.”

“Oh? Also, I’m your only sister, so I’m the favorite by default.”

“I could have no favorite at all, you scamp. What you need to know is that Mother dearest will be returning to us shortly.”

Carmilla felt the words wash over her like an icy rain, her relaxed and happy attitude wiped away in a moment.

“When? Why?”

“Not sure the latter, but her plane will be landing Friday evening. I’d expect a summons for dinner that following night, so plan accordingly.”

“ _Scheisse_.”

“Language, young lady. We don’t know what she wants yet, so don’t lose your head, then she’s already won before she’s even arrived! We need to be strategic about all this, my liebe.”

“Why couldn’t she have just stayed in Austria? Left us all alone?”

“I don’t know, but we’ll find out soon enough, it isn’t often she wants to see all of us. I need to go make some arrangements, but I’ll be in touch.”

“Bye, Mattie.”

Carmilla dropped the hand holding her phone dejectedly into her lap. Why now? Why couldn’t Mattie have called later on, after she’d gotten the morning with Laura? She wanted to wake up slowly in the girl’s arms, not be ripped out of them by Mattie and her no good, very bad news. She knew it was selfish, but she had to leave, now, and she knew there wasn’t really any time to explain why. She needed to get home and she needed to plan. She had to be ready for whatever her mother was going to throw at her. Carmilla hadn’t seen the woman in five years, though she knew her mother had only truly been out of the country for the last year. She hadn’t been in the city, thankfully, for what happened with Ell, and that miracle she hoped wasn’t the only moment of luck with her mother. She might need it on Saturday for all she knew.

Her shirt and bra were folded next to her shoes so she shrugged them on, and then her socks. Looking around, she pulled her pants over and started to struggle into them, running over in her head the myriad of possibilities as to the timing of this particular visit. She was so wrapped up in her thoughts that the small sound from behind her made her jump.

“Is everything ok? And was that German?”

Carmilla looked up at Laura and her heart tugged. She was unbelievably beautiful just awake, her face a study in sleepy concern. There was a relaxed curve to her bare shoulders and the light from the window threw golden sparks into her hair, fading thoughts of her mother away for just a moment long enough that she moved back to the bed, cupping Laura’s face and kissing her deeply. Their lips moved together, the kiss gentle, sweet.

The shorter girl sighed happily against Carmilla’s lips and she was brought back to herself. She had to go, she couldn’t drag Laura into this, couldn’t let her mother get anywhere near a being so incredibly precious. She had to protect Laura from her mother, even if that meant walking out of this apartment right now, a thing she most definitely did not want to do.

She broke the kiss and rested her forehead against Laura’s, her thumbs rubbing gently along the girl’s cheeks.

“Laura, I’m so sorry, but I have to go. There’s something I have to deal with and I-I can’t be here. You are incredible. This has been incredible. I honestly can’t say I’ve felt this alive with someone in, well, a very long time, but I have to go. Just, as cheesy as this sounds, thank you, for this. For everything..”

She knew she was panicking, knew she wasn’t doing the best job, but the longer she thought about her mother’s imminent arrival, the tighter she could feel her chest becoming, the harder it was to breathe. She needed to run, run and plan.

She turned from Laura before she could respond and pulled her boots on, hopping toward the bedroom door.

“Carm, what’s going on? Why can’t you just stay and tell me what’s happening?”

Carmilla spared the naked angel in the bed one last look, she couldn’t believe she had to walk away from this so soon. She gave Laura a small, sad smile.

“Because you wouldn’t deserve that.”

She ducked through the door and let herself out of Laura’s apartment; too nervous to wait for the elevator, she took the stairs at a decent clip, breaking into a jog as she exited the building. She just needed to move as quickly as she could, put distance between herself and Laura before her heart told her feet to turn around.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Carmilla frets over her unexpected news, Kirsch bro’s his best bro & Laura knows what Laura knows.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much all, for reading so far. 
> 
> As I was falling asleep a week or so ago, I got the sudden realization of where I was going with all this and mapped out a whole bunch of upcoming months of their lives and the insantity that mayyyyy happen. This required me to go backwards and tweak a few details in the earlier chapters to make everything fit. Nothing that you’d really notice, but was necessary. 
> 
>  
> 
> I’m really excited to see this all play out, so I hope you guys are too!

Carmilla threw herself into the open subway seat, immediately leaning forward to push the heels of her hands into her eyes, elbows dropping to her thighs. What was she thinking? What wasn’t she thinking? Her aggrieved brain swirled with unhelpful thoughts, pushing every memory of her mother’s cold disapproving glare to the forefront. She couldn’t help her response to the woman, it’s origin still burned too brightly, even twenty years later.

Carmilla did not want to see Lilita Morgan. Yes, that Lilita Morgan, of Morgan Industries, Morgan & Morgan LLP, and the Morgan real estate empire, but really, it was all Lilita. Mother dearest, Maman. One woman behind it all, pulling a thousand strings on two continents, power and control her sharpest weapons.

Carmilla shuddered and blew out a breath. So many years since she’d had to interact with her mother and she still always felt like she was outside of herself, watching a small girl attempt to unravel the cruelest mysteries of the universe. Her mother had never been a warm person, even before, but there seemed to be nothing on this Earth that could keep the shake from her bones except harnessing the all encompassing rage for what the woman had tried to turn her life into.

Their last meeting had been brief, accidental and brutal.

_She pressed the length of her body against the girl’s, the noise and clatter of the event barely reaching them, the service hallway far enough away from prying eyes that she didn’t mind risking taking the girl right here. Mattie wouldn’t go looking for her for a while anyway, she was too caught up in running her first large scale fundraiser for the front-running Mayoral candidate. Her mildly troublemaking sister would be at the bottom of her priority list, thankfully._

_The girl bit her earlobe and she brought herself back to the present, her hand curving up the girl’s inner thigh, helped by the generous slit to her dress. She cupped the girl’s pussy over the thin covering and the girl gasped into her mouth, Carmilla’s tongue beginning to to stroke the girl’s in the same pattern her fingers were across the girl’s clit. The girl, Elsie, she thinks her name was, broke off the kiss to throw her head back against the wall, Carmilla having moved aside the barrier and dipped two of her fingers inside the girl’s molten folds. Carmilla latches her lips against the girl’s pulse point, nipping lightly before sucking hard and entering the girl, starting out a quick rhythm that has Elsie squealing. She’s just about to use her free hand to clamp down some of the girl’s louder noises when a snort of derision breaks through her haze and she pulls away from the girl, ready to verbally tear down whoever was interrupting her._

_“Not surprising to see you’re still the degenerate you always proved yourself to be,” the tall woman sneered down at her. “Here I thought coming in the back entrance would be a favor to your sister, to discreetly make my presence known and not risk all her hard work with a selfish action, but there you are, knuckle deep in some girl you’ve seduced, again. I did never understand what your father saw in you. Silly man, thinking you were worth caring about. I quite thankfully see you so rarely, and yet, every time you prove to me again why I was right in deciding supporting you was a waste of my time and valuable resources. Finding a way to deny you your inheritance is only a formality at this point, so enjoy your little pet. Despite what your sister seems to think, poor girl, I’d say this is truly you at the best of your abilities. What a waste.”_

_With a contemptuous curl of her lip, the woman turned on her heel and continued toward the sounds of chatter and music, her omnipresent entourage following silently behind, the same open looks of disgust and dismissal across their faces._

_Elsie quickly pushes Carmilla’s hands away and pulls her dress back into place. “Who the fuck was that?”_

_Carmilla is almost too shocked and enraged to answer. Through her iron tight jaw she manages to force out two words._

_“My mother.”_

_Elsie shakes her head harshly. “Ok. I want nothing to do with whatever this is. It just got way too complicated.”She vaguely gestures to Carmilla and where the retreating form of Lilita Morgan could be seen as an outline far down the hall. “I’m out.” Elsie pulls her shawl around herself and walks away from Carmilla, a determined set to her shoulders._

_Carmilla barely registers Elsie’s absence, her shock threatening to overwhelm her, but the rage of embarrassment and shame burns through and she thumps her open palm against the wall, taking small comfort at the noise it produces, the sound ricocheting down the hallway._

She grimaced at the memory and rubbed her face, letting it fall into a scowl as she took in the Sunday morning happening outside the train windows, a city filled with people a few oblivious feet away from someone else’s invisible pain. _Yes, let’s think the emo thoughts, that will help_ , she chided herself.

Her mother was cruel and insufferable and Carmilla had no idea how she was going to handle whatever the ever loving fuck was coming her way in a week. Ordinarily, historically, this would be the point at which Carmilla would cut and run, but her mother had been out of her life long enough that she had built one of her own, and had no choice left but to defend it. She was going to have to be 3000% on her guard, she knew her mother’s tendrils snaked far and wide, often emerging from a shadow you hadn’t even noticed was there.

Carmilla pulled out her headphones and attempted to find music to quiet her brain and put another wall between herself and the world. She settled for something without words, deep bass and a thump that helped to keep the more disorganized thoughts at bay.

What the hell had she done that she hadn’t yet karmically paid for? Why did her mother want to show up now, and why did Mattie think she, too, was going to be needed? She knew Mattie had met with her mother many times over the years, but Carmilla very blatantly, and much to her relief, was never saddled with the call to attend their mother while she was in the city.

She checks the stop the train is pulling into and sees hers is in three, getting farther away from Laura as she goes.

Laura. _Fuck_. What was she going to do about Laura? She had almost forgotten the girl in the rush of vitriol toward her mother. She’d fucked up so badly running out of the apartment like that, after such an incredible, almost unbelievable weekend with the blonde; an unapologetic sex fiend and gentle soul, she was a study in alluring complexity. Carmilla wasn’t even sure she could come back from an exit like that, even if she could figure out a way to keep her mother from ever finding out about Laura’s existence.

Her heart wrenched at the thought of what the girl must be thinking and feeling right now and she cursed herself for leaving Laura that way, she knew she must be confused and hurt and - shit. She didn’t even leave her number. Stupid. Now she had no way of even explaining herself, if she could find something to say that didn’t sound like it was out of a telenovela.

Maybe she could go to her school on Monday? No, fuck. That’s so many levels of unprofessional and creepy. Could she go back to Laura’s apartment, do it all Say Anything style? Though as her heart tugged again, she mused that she might have to juggle this one a bit more than she was used to, she could recognize that the terrible feeling of causing Laura pain was stronger than it should be for a girl she didn’t know three days ago.

But fuck, the last two days of her life were some of her happiest, and if there was a way to salvage that, she would figure out how. She wasn’t going to be able to stay away like she had so strongly decided she had to as she stormed out of the apartment earlier. She cursed herself for a fool and stood up as the train pulled into the station, leaving the car and climbing the stairs to the Queens bound platform, waiting for the train to whisk her back to her own place, deeper into the borough.

As she waited, Carmilla rocked back and forth on her heels with her hands in her pockets, collar turned up against the breeze. Taking a moment to listen to her body, she could feel herself thrumming with energy, her nervousness mixing with the feeling of Laura still hovering underneath her skin. She couldn’t help the flash of memories that played across her mind of the night before, that first incredible coupling and then the three other times Laura had taken her with her cock after they had napped, the inhuman noises the girl had delightfully and wickedly pulled from her as they rutted and panted for hours, finally collapsing in a wet heap of flesh just as the first rays of sunlight had started to paint the ceiling a pale pink. She knew her body still bore the marks, could feel with each deep breath the bruises Laura had delightfully sucked into the undersides of her breasts and along her ribs, the scratches on her shoulder blades and the deep ache between her legs; the new knowledge of how it felt to be thoroughly fucked causing her to shiver and clench her thighs together.

Being so submissive had not really been a part of her life before Ell and now Laura, her teenage and young adult years peppered with quite a few partners, but it was her charm and her swagger that brought them to her bed, never the reverse. Before her move to New York, a reputation followed her around quite closely- Carmilla would top you the best you’d ever have, once. No matter how you begged for a repeat, the girl never gave in. To a point, it had been true, even in the city. Then Ell had come along with her eyes blazing, suddenly in her space that night and maneuvering her against the file cabinets, her hot lips against Carmilla’s and she had melted into the woman’s touch, decided to let someone else lead for once & didn’t fight the tide of lust that had crashed over her. She had learned she liked the feeling of Ell in control, but after the disastrous end to their affair, Carmilla had locked that vulnerability away and shoved it in the darkest, dustiest corner of her heart she could find.

Thankfully the differences between Ell and Laura were great and varied. Where Ell had taken, Laura asked her body to comply and Carmilla eagerly acquiesced. Ell had been a whirlwind, their coupling always frantic, Carmilla thought it then another side of Ell’s take charge and fiery attitude but looking back she had to come to the conclusion that it had been her desperation and not her temperament. Where Ell had been insistent and unyielding, in the early hours of that morning Laura had formed her demands as a heated supplication, ultimately allowing Carmilla to set the pace, though once permission had been given, Laura made use of every inch of that consent; her body was transformed into a wanton ball of need that the girl had strummed to ever higher frequencies before allowing her to finally succumb to her arousal at the last possible second, her rag doll body crashing back down to Earth each time to find herself secure in Laura’s arms.

Being with Laura shook something deep in the foundation of herself, and while in those moments she had felt free to let herself go in a way she hadn’t understood she could experience with another human being. She didn’t want to let go of that. For her mother, or anything else, if it was as real as she felt it could be.

Carmilla stepped into the train car as it slowed to a halt in front of her, moving across to lean against the opposite doors, her mind awash with conflicting thoughts.

—

Unlocking her front door, Carmilla stepped through into her apartment and sighed loudly. The rest of the train ride hadn’t brought any great revelations of plans or actions to take and she still was stuck on how to even begin to fix the way she’d messed up with Laura. She supposed if it came down to it she could stalk the girl on Facebook and find her that way, but the idea still didn’t fit right with her. She needed a better path forward. 

She tossed herself down on the couch and toed off her boots, trying and failing to not think about the last time she had been in the same place, freely riding Laura’s fingers in wanton abandonment. She shivered at the memory, and groaned to herself. What was she going to do? The memory of Laura’s hands on her only pulled the pain of hurting Laura this morning tighter. The girl had been nothing but amazing to her and she had run out like a panicking coward.

She stood back up and went to hang her jacket in the closet, pushing aside her work jacket to fit the one in her hand and she paused. A vague scratching memory pried under the edges of her mind. Something about her work jacket and...Perry?

THE POST-IT NOTE!

She wanted to yell or do a jig. She was going to kiss Perry and her perfect anal retentive nature, saving her ass and her sanity!!

Carmilla clawed at the lapel of the hanging leather jacket and unzipped the top pocket, shoving her hand inside and pulling out a crumpled bright pink square of paper, Perry’s perfect script staring up at her.

 

_Director Laura Hollis_

_347-555-2163_

_BE NICE!_

 

Carmilla danced backward through the room, holding the paper triumphantly above her head, suddenly slumping when she realized now she had to figure out what to say to the girl. She groaned and kicked her toe at the curled edge of the rug. Could she come back from this? Was there a way Laura would forgive her for running out of her bed like that? As much as the connection she had made with the girl burned brightly, they were still virtual strangers. Closing her eyes, Carmilla could tell you about the three freckles above Laura’s left hip bone and the noises she made when Carmilla sucked at the skin there, but she didn’t know what the reaction would be in both admitting her fuck up, and explaining what had driven her to do so.

She put the post it on the edge of her desk. She wouldn’t contact Laura until she had something better to say than just, “I’m sorry.” Laura deserved better than that.

Carmilla turned her back resolutely on the flash of pink and marched herself into her bedroom. She pulled her shirt off and flung it in the direction of her laundry pile, the rest of her clothes following soon after. She padded over and stood in front of her only full length mirror, ghosting her hand over the small curve of her stomach, then tracing the outline of the innumerable small mouth shaped bruises and bite marks still fresh on her skin. Carmilla shivered as she ran her fingers along her collarbone and the two bruises there and she felt her lower belly tighten.

Baring her skin to the air had the side effect that she could now smell Laura’s scent lingering on her, the sweet honey of her soap and the slight tang of their mixed arousal and sweat. Her hands had continued across her own body, her thoughts lost in the early morning hours she had spent under Laura, riding Laura, Laura’s insistent fingers and tongue throwing her hurtling off cliffs of pleasure. She couldn’t stop her own fingers from dipping down between her folds, her hips bucking slightly as she grazed her clit. She bit her lip and met her own reflection in the mirror, not surprised to see the blush spreading across her cheeks and chest.

When was the last time she felt inclined to do this? In the midst of everything, even though she felt a little guilty considering how she left, she couldn’t help how wet she was still, how her body still thrummed with the ghost of Laura, her need overpowering her slight self embarrassment. Her other hand moved of its own accord, tracing the love bites across her chest before cupping her own breast and tugging on the already hardened nipple.

A groan escaped Carmilla as she allowed herself to continue her self-ministrations, her right hand teasing her clit, in her mind it was Laura touching her as she had earlier, denying Carmilla the relief she had begged for, her voice growing ragged as Laura had pushed and pushed and pushed at what sensations Carmilla could handle. Her hand sped up as she watched herself in the mirror, her face flushing and eyes losing a bit of focus as she fell further into her memories, each mark she gazed on in the mirror fueling her need.

As she hurtled towards the crest of her orgasm, her legs started to tremble and she widened her stance, her eyes boring into her own reflection, her hips stuttering out their own rhythm. Her hands worked faster, her clit throbbing under her fingers and electric shocks shooting straight to it as she rolled and pulled at her nipples. She could hear the wet squelching sound of her arousal and knew it would only take a bit more before she was well and truly gone.

She forced herself to maintain eye contact with her reflection, daring herself to watch what thoughts of Laura did to her, what the visual remains of their trysts on her skin did to her, how deeply the girl had taken root in her desires. She abandoned her nipples and brought her hand down past the one already frantically rubbing her clit and sunk two fingers inside of herself. She moaned aloud Laura’s name, her fingers a sad substitute for the girl’s cock, but her body reacted nonetheless, her forceful thrusts causing her back to arch as she tried to delve ever deeper.

Carmilla felt the deep tightening inside her cunt and thrust into herself harder, watching as her whole body began to shake, the slick on the skin of her thighs catching the light. Her breaths had become pants, a vowel-filled low moan escaped her as she fought to keep her eye contact. If she was going to make herself cum over this girl, she would witness her own undoing.

It took only a few more deep thrusts, her hand on her clit a blur, before Carmilla was swept away by her crest, her body convulsing as waves of pleasure rocketed through her and she yelled out Laura’s name, collapsing onto the bed next to her, her hands still trapped between her legs. 

Facedown on her bed, she took deep gulping lungfuls of air in as she could, the aftershocks of her orgasm still twitching across her sensitive skin. She pushed away the thoughts of feeling embarrassed over her own desires, her sticky hands still being clenched by her cunt as the last waves passed though her. She was going to fix things, because she needed this to be the story she told Laura in public to get the girl to pounce on her later, of how their fucking had been so incredible she couldn’t keep her hands off herself when alone afterward, not that she had run out dramatically, using the memory to get herself off later.

Groaning, she extricated her slightly pruned fingers from her pussy and flopped onto her back. Oh if she could be lucky enough to just lay here, her skin tingling and muscles relaxed, and magically have everything fall into place without her effort. She knew it wasn’t going to happen, though, and launched herself off the bed, heading across the hall into her bathroom.

She loathed showering the girl off her skin, but nothing good would come of staying sticky, so she sighed as she set the water temperature and stepped under the spray.

—

Carmilla spent the next several hours pacing through her apartment, glancing at the pink square every few minutes, attempting to do some dishes or listen to music to distract herself, but her eyes were always drawn back to the corner of her desk. 

On her next pass by the desk she came with a cleaning cloth, dusting the already neat surface as she stared at the square of paper, hoping she could will into existence a much better message to send to the girl, knowing each moment that passed was another that she was hurting Laura, and she felt another stab of guilt. She dropped the cloth and went to find her phone, locating it finally, stuffed between two couch cushions.

Unlocking it, she noticed Mattie hadn’t reached back out yet, but she was always arranging her own chess pieces several moves ahead, one of the skills she’d thankfully inherited from Maman, so it wasn’t that surprising she hadn’t updated Carmilla yet, but she did hope she’d know soon a bit more what Mattie knew. She needed more information to put together her own plan, no matter Mattie’s contingencies. With the date of the release of her inheritance on the horizon, she knew her mother was probably going to pull out all the evil tricks she had to make sure Carmilla never touched it.

Her finger hovered over the photos icon. With a sigh she poked the screen twice and was greeted with the last picture in her camera roll, the one Laura had demanded they take before they had left the boulder in the park. The selfie caught them both grinning, Laura’s head tucked into Carmilla’s shoulder and the brilliant sparkle in her eyes perfectly captured. She remembered how Laura turned her head back after taking the picture and had kissed Carmilla soundly, gentle but decisive in her action. She had cupped Carmilla’s face and deepened the kiss, her tongue fluttering over Carmilla’s. Their lips had sparked together, Carmilla falling head first into the sensation of Laura.

Shaking her head to dispel the conflicting feelings the photo elicited, she opened a new message and typed in Laura’s number. Taking a deep breath, she started her message. Her mother had poisoned enough in her life and she wanted to hope she was capable of finding the courage to stand up for what she had just found.

 _[Me]: I’m sorry. I should have stayed. My sister dropped some very worrying news in my lap and I panicked. If I hurt you, I apologize. I never meant for this to happen, I never wanted to leave._

_I never wanted to leave your arms_ , she should have said, but couldn’t quite be that vulnerable. She hit send before she could talk herself out of it, tossed the phone face down on the couch so she wouldn’t be tempted to continually stare at it, and then stood up and walked straight into her bedroom on the pretense of gathering clothes to wash.

—

The sun had gone down and Carmilla had driven herself nearly mad attempting to not look at her phone, both a success and a failure as she hadn’t flipped it over, but it sat there on the couch with her, mockingly silent and within reach. She was so far down her mental rabbit hole of self loathing and anxiety, that the dual challenge of Laura’s heart and her mother’s plans fucking with her sense of self, her carefully orchestrated walls and the strain of keeping everything she still carried under wraps mentally buried where she’d left it was taxing her energy

She nearly jumped when R2-D2 sounded from her phone, an incoming text. Her hand flew to her phone, but came to a halt right before she flipped the phone over. If it was Laura, well, she had no idea what the girl was going to respond with. If it was Mattie, of course it wasn’t going to be great news either. She let the indecision gnaw at her for a few seconds before she gave in and turned the phone over. It was from Laura.

_[Laura]: Meet me at the corner of South St and Whitehall at 7pm tomorrow. Bring a coat._

Well, she could do that.

—

Carmilla fidgeted on the train all the way to work, fidgeted through the department’s Monday morning meeting and was about to fidget her way through replying to emails before Kirsch approached her desk on his crutches.

“I can’t take watching anymore. I haven’t seen you this damn unsettled in a long time. Tell me, Carm-sexy, what the hell happened this weekend?” He smiled at her, but it faltered when even the terrible old nickname didn’t provoke her anger. He tried again.

“What, did you run away with the Director from Friday or something? Torrid queer love affair? C’mon you know you can tell me these things, I’m your designated Zeta!”

When Carmilla’s panicked eyes darted up at him in horror, he realized how close he’d guessed.

“No shit!! Really??”

Carmilla grabbed him by the arm and none too gently dragged him down into the chair next to her.

“Shut _up_ , Kirsch!”

Kirsch was floored. He’d offered the joke as that, a joke. Never in a million years would he believe that Carmilla would actually find someone in so unlikely a place. But she was his bro, and how could he be anything but happy?

“I knew me messing up my ankle had to be for a reason. Now you’ve met your own little hottie, and you can tell me all about her,” he said, in a bit more than a whisper.

Carmilla tugged roughly on his arm again.

“Kirsch, I am _not_ talking about this here. Yes, something happened, and she’s incredible and it was so intense and I don’t really feel like it was real a-and now it’s a crazy mess but I may have a chance to save it but-“

“Woah, woah, bro. Take a deep breath in. We can talk about this after work, right? Get a table and a brew and hash it out. Ok? You’re my honorary Zeta. Bros for life.”

Carmilla rolled her eyes fondly at Kirsch. Their friendship was an unconventional one, her constant pseudo rejection of his puppy dog attention amusing him to no end, knowing that underneath all her spitfire, Carmilla was just as big a softy as he was. He enjoyed that she needed him to remind her sometimes that was the case, and she had always proven to have his back. Plus he benefitted from her quick scathing wit...when it was pointed at everyone else.

The raven haired girl nodded her agreement and released her captive, letting Kirsch right himself on his crutches.

“I’ll come back at five for you, be ready,” he called over his shoulder as he turned and made his way toward his desk.

Carmilla settled a little after that, her Kirsch-mandated post work therapy session perhaps exactly what she needed before she met Laura.

—

“Carmilla!”

She looked up from her spreadsheet and into Perry’s unreadable face. 

“Yeah, Perr? What’s up?”

Perry held out the printed sheet in her hand. She shook her head at Carmilla and gestured for her to read it.

“I know I warned you about being nice, but I didn’t expect this! Really, Carmilla?!”

Her heart sinking, Carmilla brought her eyes to the paper and stifled a gasp. It was an email to Mel with Perry cc-ed, written by...Laura. Her eyes darted to the first line of the email and she began to read, her dread growing. She read the first couple sentences and her dread turned to confusion, the next few brought about a lifted eyebrow and by the last, both her eyebrows had disappeared into her hairline. What on Earth had driven Laura to write this? It was all so...complementary..?

Laura had written an incredibly generous account of her visit, illustrating to Mel the value of Carmilla’s guidance & depth of her knowledge and ended the email saying she was looking forward to learning more at the group session later on. Had she written this on Friday and only sent it now, under some moral code to be professionally kind?Or was this supposed to act as some clue to how Laura was feeling right now? Carmilla felt she now had even more questions. Did she write it knowing Carmilla would get a chance to read it, even? Or was this Laura just being herself? Proving even further her incredible qualities? If Carmilla had fucked everything up as badly as she assumed, Laura sending this was perhaps a challenge? A warning maybe to keep things professional? Of course, again that all hinged on her getting a chance to read the email and did Laura assume Perry would show her?

“Are you still reading Carmilla? You don’t have to memorize it, you can keep that copy if your ego needs the reminder later on.”

The words were said kindly, but Perry still gave her a concerned look for her reaction to the letter, and Carmilla shook her off with a shrug and a feigned smile.

“I just didn’t know I’d made such an impression is all.”

Perry smiled, satisfied with her answer.

“Really looks like you did. I already put a copy in your file. It will reflect well on you at your next evaluation.”

Carmilla’s eyes widened.

“Uh, thanks for thinking of me, Perr. I appreciate it. How was your weekend?”

Perry’s eyes lit up and she gripped the edge of the divider tightly, a grin stretching across her face, her curls bobbing.

“I’m so glad you asked, it was wonderful. You know that bakery owner I ran into at the Farmer’s Market who tried my muffins and really liked them? She gave me a shot to provide them and some cookies to her brunch customers on Sunday and they were an instant hit! Within two hours, everything I made was gone! She wants me to come on twice a month and provide four different muffins and six different cookies for her brunch service. I’m so excited! I finally get to put all those midnight baking projects at college to good use!”

Carmilla grinned. “That’s incredible, Perr! As much as I love knowing the secret of how awesome your baking is, I’m so glad the rest of the city is going to get the chance to know now too! We have to celebrate. Lunch on me today, what do you say? You can tell me what flavors you’re planning!”

“I will send you an Outlook calendar invite.”

They shared a smile and Perry walked back toward her desk, her usually hurried steps a bit lighter today, she didn’t even notice Kirsch dropping crumbs from his doughnut on the carpet as he stood by the water cooler; passing him by, she was blissfully lost in muffin and cookie combinations.

—

Lunch with Perry had been stress free and enjoyable, her friend speaking most of the meal, getting deep in on her plans for the next brunch, in two weeks. She told Carmilla she was going to get roped into taste testing some of her new creations & Carmilla suggested Perry make an afternoon of it, perhaps inviting a few folks over for a tasting panel. Perry thought it a wonderful idea and pencilled Carmilla’s plan in for the following Sunday. 

Carmilla had let Perry lead the discussion, not quite at the place that she wanted to tell Perry of all the developments with her mother and Laura- while an incredible support, Carmilla understood Perry’s protective streak ran deep and she usually waited to present Perry with a more secure story, one the girl would accept as the best of Carmilla’s efforts. A disappointed Perry face was one of her least favorite experiences, Perry was always in her corner, but her corner was always intense.

She noted there was about a half hour left to her day and stretched in her office chair, her arms angling toward the ceiling. It had been a decently productive day, once she had been able to distract herself with work, but as her mysterious meeting with Laura drew closer, her nerves started to kick in again. She kept reminding herself her best and really, only, plan was to be as honest as possible. As unbelievable as the weekend had been, she understood that what her life was and where she was in it might be too much for Laura, and if that was the case, she would have to accept that.

Not that she wanted to, but she could attempt to be a well adjusted adult, if only for the evening.

Carmilla started to wrap up her lingering emails, confirming a location for a training she was running the next day, Kirsch’s lumbering form appearing beside her desk at five on the dot.

“Alright lady, let’s hit the pavement. There’s a beer with my name on it, and maybe one for you too.”

—

She slid onto the bar stool, folding her arms onto the bar top and resting her head on them for a long second before groaning and sitting straight again when Kirsch approached. He placed the pint glass of cider in front of her, and took a huge gulp of his own beer before putting it down.

“Ok. Now. What’s going on here, little Zeta?”

Carmilla huffed and Kirsch waited, knowing Carmilla would tell him, and let her stew a bit in the silence. Taking a sip of her cider after fidgeting with the glass, she dabbed her lip with her bent knuckle and looked up at one of her oldest friends.

“Alright. I went to the school and met Director Hollis. I-I honestly didn’t know what to think of her other than I couldn’t stop trying to figure her out. I did the training, nothing happened, but we had this...spark. I felt like I’d been lightly electrocuted every time we made eye contact and we spoke so easily, I just wanted to spend the rest of the day with her. But I couldn’t, so I just hoped I’d get to flirt with her a bit more at the next training. Then Mattie made me go to the fundraiser that night and Laura was there, of all places. We spoke some more and the flirting just kept getting easier. Plus she picked up on things I’d never expect her to notice and called me out on them, no one ever does that. But then Mattie had to introduce me to someone and I lost her to the crowd. Went to buy myself some whiskey afterward, and there she was in the store, sass and red wine and I wanted to take the risk. We ended up back at my place up on the roof talking and I just let her in so far, Kirsch, I told her about Ell.”

Kirsch started at that and his eyes went wide.

“Ell? This girl knocked all your defenses down in so few hours enough that you told her about Ell??”

Carmilla looked back at him, squirming slightly under his amazed gaze.

“She just...she felt safe. As much as she also spent a good portion of that time looking at me like she wanted to dip me in glaze and eat me, she just oozed trust. I went for it, Kirsch, and it scared the hell out of me. But she didn’t run. She didn’t run, Kirsch. She...she listened. And didn’t judge me.”

Kirsch watched his longtime friend, the hope and tiny eager thread to Carmilla’s voice an encouraging thing to hear. He was there when everything fell apart with Ell, held Carmilla as she had cried her heart out, held her while she found a way to put herself back together and followed close on her heels as she escaped into the DOE. He was a devout member of Team Karnstein, and would march behind his friend into Hell to war with a pissed off death goddess if she asked.

“She’s gotta be something pretty special then.” He smiled at his friend, who returned the smile half heartedly.

“Ok, so I must be missing something here. Sounds like you were about to fall in lesbians with her.”

Carmilla quirked a wry smile.

“You have no goddamn idea there, Kirsch. When she kissed me...this is going to sound so stupid, but therewas part of me that I think was waiting for her, waiting for her lips. Like she was healing something I’d looked away from for so long I’d forgotten it was still broken.”

Kirsch let out a low whistle and Carmilla favored him with a small smile. 

“I know, right? Me getting this sappy.”

Kirsch snorted and took another gulp of his beer.

“All of this sounds amazing, bro. Why do you still look so upset?”

Carmilla cringed and picked up her cider, swallowing a mouthful to cover her silence.

“After a weekend of discovering this ridiculous connection and some world exploding sex, I fucked it all up. That’s what happened.”

Kirsch made to comment but Carmilla indicated she would explain.

“Mattie called yesterday morning, dropped a goddamn thermonuclear bomb in my lap. Mother is back and Mattie expects we’ll all be to dinner on Saturday.”

Kirsch’s entire demeanor instantly changed. He sat straighter and a cold look flitted through his eyes as his jaw tightened.

“What does Voldemort want?”

Carmilla sighed and poked at the napkin under her pint glass.

“I don’t have a fucking clue. And unless Mattie calls to update me, she has no idea either.”

“Ok, so we’re gonna have to build a game plan there, but other than making sure Lilita never sets eyes on or hears of Laura, how did you fuck things up?”

Carmilla arched a self-critical eyebrow and pressed her lips into a thin line while she rolled her eyes.

“Because I’m an anxious motherfucker and as soon as Mattie called, which by the way I had to climb out of those amazing, warm arms to pick up the stupid call, I went into full panic mode, got dressed, kissed her goodbye and ran out of the apartment while she sat there confused and forlorn looking, calling out after me. I’m a fucking idiot.”

“Oh, bro, you didn’t...”

“Oh, bro, I _totally_ did.”

Kirsch brought a hand up to his face and rubbed it, shaking his head as he made eye contact again with Carmilla. 

“Did you leave it like that?”

“Thankfully no. We never got around to exchanging numbers, but when I got back to the apartment I remembered Perry had given hers to me. I sent her a very apologetic text and about 6 hours later I got a text back saying to meet her at a street corner down by Battery Park at 7 tonight.”

Kirsch glanced at his watch. “Well, you should probably get going in a few then. What’s your plan for when you see her?”

Carmilla ran a hand through her hair before taking a long swallow of her cider.

“Be honest. Apologize. Give her the benefit of the doubt. Apologize some more. Answer what she asks and listen if she has something to say. If she runs, well, I can understand that. Ell is one thing, but my mother? That’s like taking on Godzilla out of the gate. If it’s too much for her, I’ll respect her decision. Better now, I suppose, before I went and did something stupid like fall for her.”

Kirsch snorted. “Slippery slope, bro, and you’re almost to spontaneous Once More With Feeling-ing levels of crush angst here already. But that sounds like the best way to do it. Say what you need to, and be vulnerable, as much as you can. Lilita is a lot, but you already felt safe enough to tell her about Ell, and we both know how often you let that story see the light of day. I hope it goes well, bro. Even though I know you’re freaking out a little, I haven’t seen your face light up like that in a long while when talking about someone, and I hope she realizes what chance she’d be taking by walking away. You’re a decent catch there, Karnstein.”

He jokingly punched her shoulder and they both grinned at each other.

“Thanks Kirsch.”

“Gotta. You’re my ride or die bro.” 

Carmilla surprised Kirsch by leaning forward and giving him a hug. He’d gone slightly pink by the time she pulled back, but looked utterly pleased with his best-bro friending. Carmilla deserved someone who saw her, and if Laura could be this person, he wanted to see it work out. 

Carmilla checked the time again and Kirsch nodded at her. “Go on, lovebird. Do the scary thing.”

She smiled at him and said her goodbyes, weaving her way through the now much more populated bar and out into the night. Heading toward the subway, she could feel all the tiny winged creatures in her belly waking up and she tried to take a few deep breaths, knowing it was utterly useless.

—

Orienting herself as she came out from underground, she headed toward the corner, taking in the harbor in front of her. Tourists were taking pictures & being sold boat tours, helicopter tours and anything you could think of stamped with “I [heart] NY” on it. She’d only taken a few dozen steps across the plaza when she faltered. Her eyes had landed on Laura, who had already racked focus on Carmilla, her face closed off and unreadable as she leaned against a low concrete barrier.

The raven haired girl felt her heart give a tug as she took in Laura’s appearance, the very professional pant suit she was wearing doing absolutely nothing to quell the fluttering in Carmilla’s stomach. Laura looked, well, effortlessly sexy as hell. Her casual lean against the barrier was nothing short of runway worthy and the cold confidence pouring off her was definitely a turn on.

A rush of sadness and guilt swept over Carmilla as she remembered again why they were meeting and she barely kept her face from falling. Recovering from her misstep, she started forward again. She could do this. She would do this.

_Just be vulnerable. Be vulnerable._

She approached Laura and gave her an uncertain smile.

“Hey.”

Laura tilted her head slightly at Carmilla and the taller girl felt the weight of her gaze.

“You have your metrocard, right?”

Carmilla raised an eyebrow.

“Yes, I have my metrocard. Why do-“

“Good,” Laura interrupted. “We’re going this way.”

“Laura, I-“

“Not here.” Laura shook her head. “We will talk about this when we’re where we need to be. Not here. Just...trust me, ok?”

Carmilla saw the tiniest crack in Laura’s wall and underneath, a hint of the girl’s earnestness. It was enough. She nodded.

Laura’s face relaxed a tiny fraction and she nodded back before turning and leading Carmilla across the plaza and toward the ferry terminal. Carmilla had no idea what Laura’s plan was. Why were they going to Staten Island?

They joined the line to board the boat and Laura stared straight ahead, not making eye contact with Carmilla, but without an immediate press of other bodies, had still elected to walk right alongside Carmilla, the backs of their hands occasionally brushing. Carmilla fought down every impulse she had to take Laura’s hand, but she wasn’t going to fuck this up before anything had even been said.

When they were allowed to board the docked boat, Carmilla followed Laura up the front stairs and along the side of the upper deck. Laura paused halfway along the boat and rested her hands on the railing, her eyes looking out toward Ellis Island. Carmilla watched her in profile, and waited. She knew Laura was in charge of this interaction and she could be patient. Laura stayed watching the horizon as the engines several decks below their feet rumbled into life and the lines were cast off, their boat fighting for momentum as it began its path back to its sibling dock across the water.

As they began to move out into open water and Carmilla took in the view of the Hudson River as it wound along the curves of the western shore of Manhattan, Laura turned back to her.

“Do you know why I asked you to meet me here?”

Carmilla shook her head.

“Her.” Laura pointed out across the harbor and Carmilla followed her gesture, her eyes landing on Lady Liberty.Her heart gave a little confused leap and she looked back at Laura, her eyes full of questions.

“I want the truth, Carmilla. You chose to trust me before, on the roof, and I need you to decide if you want to really trust me, or not. You leaving really hurt me. I didn’t know why you were so afraid all of the sudden and then you were kissing me and then you were out the door with a parting shot and I didn’t even have your number! I was worried about you! And you just ran out of there like-“

Laura dipped her head for a second before meeting Carmilla’s unguarded gaze again, her own a mix of sadness and fire.

“You left like those two days didn’t mean anything to you and that’s not fair. You can’t just do that to me Carm, you can’t just walk into my life, give me an incredible and intense and passionate and open and downright fucking fulfilling weekend and then just ghost the hell out!I know who I am, Carmilla, and I know I don’t deserve that.”

She wrung her hands on the railing and her eyes blazed into Carmilla.

“I brought you out here because I want the truth, and I want your green friend to stand witness. I want the whole truth, Carmilla Karnstein. I think whatever this could be is worth that. If you can’t give me that, then you can’t, but if not, we’re done. If you can, Liberty and I are all ears.”


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Feeeeeeliings, so many feeeelllinnngss...
> 
> (and a little bit of smut.)

“Laura.” It was an entreaty and a confession; Carmilla felt her heart sear white-hot and she twitched, stopping herself from what she wanted, to rush forward and envelop the girl in a tight hold and not let go, but she couldn’t, not yet.

Laura caught the slight movement and her body stiffened. She squared her shoulders.

“You’re going to have to do better than that, Carmilla.”

“Where do you want me to start?”

Laura huffed. “What made you run out of my apartment like that?”

“Mattie called to tell me that our mother was returning to the city.”

“And that’s enough to have you run out like you were on fire?”

Carmilla fixed her gaze on Laura, her tone decisive.

“Yes.”

“Really now.”

Laura gave her an unimpressed look; Carmilla sighed and ran a hand through her hair.

“I freely admit I fucked up the tuck and roll, I know that. I accept that I hurt you, and can only give you my honest apology. My mother is...a very difficult and complex and not at all safe part of my life and I panicked when Mattie called. I just wanted to put as much distance between what she was capable of and you, even if that meant giving you up. As soon as I got on the train I knew I’d fucked up, but by then it was too late. A lot of things have happened in my life that have taught me to run first and my mother brings out my worst coping mechanisms. What happened between us was so incredible, my first thought was to make sure she couldn’t touch you, couldn’t hurt you, couldn’t use you. That if no one knew we were or had been together, you would be safe.”

Carmilla paused.

“Have you heard of Morgan Industries?”

Laura gave her a look. “Who hasn’t heard of Morgan Industries? What the hell does that have to do with your mother?”

Carmilla stared at her green friend as she came closer into view on the boat’s slow moving arc across the harbor. The sun was starting to go down and there was a brilliant orange and pink sunset building in front of them. Carmilla barely noticed, her heart in her throat.

_Here goes. Be vulnerable._

“It has everything to do with my mother. She is Morgan Industries. Lilita Morgan is my mother.”

Laura’s eyes went wide.

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me! But your mother paid for those needle exchange sites and helped get Planned Parenthood funded again when that legislation went through! She even paid all those school districts’ lunch debts off! And you’re telling me she’s some sort of super villain? How could that be the case?”

Carmilla’s laugh was dark and hollow.

“I’m well aware of her public persona. That is all it is, though. Public kindness breeds public trust. Trust can be manipulated.”

“Ok. So who is she then?”

“My mother is an incredibly calculating and cruel woman. She made most of my childhood an absolute hell. Plus she killed my father. Fuck, I’m pretty sure Mattie’s, too.”

At Laura’s shocked expression she continued on quickly.

“Look. My mother is true, actual, serious business. She is incredibly powerful and would think nothing of destroying your life if she thought it would hurt me. That’s a lot up front. I’ll answer any question you want, Laura, because those days with you meant more to me than you would believe, but as much as I want nothing than to fall back into that place with you and never leave, she’s coming here because she’s up to something and I have to make sure I’m ahead of her. You joked before about a Gotham City backstory, well here’s the real one. I’m selfish enough to say that even though I completely understand if this is too much, and I do, honestly... I hope this doesn’t scare you away. You’re incredible, Laura, and I wish I could give you something simple and easy because I’ve found caring about you is. But my life won’t ever be that.”

Laura searched Carmilla’s eyes for any sign of deceit or hint that the girl was anything other than absolutely candid and found none. Her brows drew together in concern and she took a hesitantstep toward Carmilla.

“So you’re not joking.”

“I really wish I was.”

“What about the authorities?”

Carmilla gave Laura a rueful look.

“Would you have believed a grief stricken eight year old whose father clearly had died from cancer if they start raving that their mother poisoned him, instead? Or believe that Mattie’s dad had anything other than a tragic accident on an icy road? My mother is too smart for that. Way too smart. I learned that early, and was reminded often. But I have something she doesn’t know about and one day she will get what she deserves.”

Carmilla’s face twisted with her long carried anger and pain, her mouth a tight furious line and Laura couldn’t stop herself, she reached out and cupped Carmilla’s face, her thumb caressing a cheekbone. 

“Oh Carm.”

Carmilla leaned into the touch, her eyes closing. They stood there for long seconds before Carmilla reached out a shaky arm and Laura allowed herself to be pulled into Carmilla’s embrace. She tucked her head into Carmilla’s shoulder and wrapped her arms around the slender girl, feeling Carmilla trembling even through her coat.

Carmilla felt Laura’s arms tighten around her and she gave into the feeling of being comforted, let her walls finally fall and she pulled Laura into her even more, her nose buried in Laura’s sweet smelling hair. She looked out over the water and for a fleeting second allowed herself to feel the hope of Laura’s embrace.

—

They stayed holding each other as the boat crossed the bay, neither speaking to fill the silence, but lending their feelings through how tight a hold they kept on one another. When they made berth on Staten Island, Laura laced their fingers together to lead Carmilla off the boat, only to join the line of people waiting to board again. Carmilla came out of her haze long enough to raise a quizzical eyebrow.

Laura just squeezed her hand in a silent plea of patience, she wasn’t quite sure she could trust her voice yet. She had too many important questions to ask and was busily ranking and filing to the front which ones she needed to ask first. Though above it all her mind was swirling for what this had meant for Carmilla’s life. Clearly she had been through experiences that Laura could somewhat understand, she had lost her mother at a young age; but her father was an incredible man, so it had made the loss at least bearable. It sounded like Carmilla had been afforded no such thing and her heart broke for the girl, knowing the despair she herself had felt then, even with her father’s arms available to her for comfort when it became too much.

She watched Carmilla’s face as they waited to board, a little lost in her thoughts, but her jaw was still set in a determined grit and the hand that held Laura’s was firm and warm. She started to gently rub the back of Carmilla’s thumb with her own and watched as the girl’s jaw slowly began to relax.

Laura was aware enough to know that she had two true options, with how she operated. She could either follow her heart, the one this dark haired girl had piqued in a surprisingly intense way in so short a time, or cut and run right now. She only put herself in things 100%, and this could be no different. She was either in this, or out. She knew she had started off this journey thinking it was going to be her holding Carmilla to choosing an action, but now it was on her. Was knowing the rest of the story and entwining her life with this near stranger worth the hope of something between them that would make the action worth the risk? Or should she think of herself and LaF and her school and let those with power play their games far from her? 

Laura had learned enough from her uncle and his cases in court to see that the more power and money and influence you had, the less you cared about having messes in need of cleaning up. If every word Carmilla had said was true, and she had no reason to doubt her, then Laura was about to attempt free bleeding amongst sharks. 

She sighed, Carmilla catching the sound and glancing her way. The two shared a nervously hesitant smile before Carmilla dropped her gaze again to the ground, the lack of surety between them hanging heavy. Laura felt bad, but she still needed a few more minutes to find her footing before she committed to a decision. 

They moved forward and boarded the boat again, this time Laura leading them to an inside bench, as out of the way as she could find. The pair sat and Laura kept hold of Carmilla’s hand, resting it in her lap. A few long seconds passed before Carmilla raised her head and met Laura’s eyes. 

Carmilla found Laura looking at her as patiently as she could muster, a mirror of the same look she’d been given on the roof when telling her tale of Ell woe. She knew Laura’s quick mind had a million questions, and she would answer them all, she would stand by her words with that. Carmilla had never told anyone the full story of what she had discovered, not even Mattie. In the case of her sister, it had been to protect her until Carmilla was sure of her information, of the story it told; beyond that, she had never trusted anyone enough to share it all. Kirsch knew a great deal, but Carmilla had kept the darkest pieces known only to herself. She had always concluded it was safer that way, only she could get hurt.

She attempted a wry smile at Laura.

“Questions? Comments? Concerns?”

Laura squeezed the hand in her lap and returned a rueful look. 

“Many, as I’m sure you expect. I just have seventeen I want to ask at once, but I don’t want my enthusiasm for the story to overwhelm your trust in me. I want you to know what you tell me is safe with me, Carm. I’m not going to betray you, even if things turn out differently than we’d like.”

Carmilla’s eyes narrowed slightly, weighing Laura’s words. She nodded. She could accept that.

“Ok. I guess first, do you have any idea what your mother wants?”

Carmilla shook her head. “I honestly don’t know. I haven’t seen her in five years. Mattie had no idea either when we talked and I know that she’s been in contact with Maman pretty regularly. She’s still set on Mattie taking over the empire when she’s retired, but she wants her to make a name for herself first, thus working for the Mayor. When she’s thirty-three, the age Maman was when she took over for my father, Mattie is to start as well. When we were younger, Mattie would work in Maman’s office during the summers, so it’s not like she doesn’t know a good chunk of the business, but between college and now, neither one of us has been involved, really. It’s all been Will, still inside.”

“Wait, who is Will?”

“Sorry. Younger brother. He and I...it’s complicated. He was really little when our father died, and he stuck to me like glue. But when Maman had sent me away, I was gone so long that by the time I came back, we were strangers to each other. We...haven’t gotten along well since. He’s in Maman’s pocket for sure, but I don’t know how much of her plans and deeds she really tells him about. He was the only one of us she cared for, so I’m sure she protects him from the darker nature of herself.”

Carmilla sighed. 

“There’s a lot of story to tell about how we all got to this point, and I’ll gladly tell you it all, if you want the whole thing, it’s just, I’ve always had to stand up to her alone, I’ve never let myself be vulnerable around her if I could help it and having you by my side would be painting a huge target on you. I want you in my life, Laura, I do. But I feel like I can’t ask you to take on my fire breathing dragon of a mother before we’ve even gone on a date! This all feels so crazy and fast and chaotic and...I’m just- it’s all a bit overwhelming.”

Carmilla started to curl in on herself, worrying the edge of the bench with her fingers. Laura frowned, she didn’t like the girl hurting. She had come to her internal conclusion, but wanted to lay it all out, make sure she really knew what she was about to run headlong into.

“Ok. So your mother is going to show up, presumably with Will in tow, to hatch some sort of nefarious scheme, and she’s going to want you there, while at the same time, perfectly at home with destroying the life of anyone you care about to keep you under her thumb. And you have no idea over what.”

Carmilla met her eyes and nodded.

“Yep. That’s about the whole thing. I mean it could be some sort of public fundraising that she wants support for, could be something here she wants to buy, though I don’t know how we’d fit in there...it’s a total unknown, and unless Mattie hears something, I’m going to have to walk into that dinner pretty much blind.”

Laura had been stroking Carmilla’s hand while they spoke and she stilled her movements as she came to her decision. She looked Carmilla in the eyes and gave her a gentle smile.

“Maybe blind, but not alone.”

Carmilla blinked. Had she heard Laura right?

“Y-you sure about this? This is more than a lot, Laura, this is-“

Laura squeezed Carmilla’s hand.

“This is worth trying for. You’re worth trying for, Carm. We could be something incredible.  Besides, you’re going to need my brain.” She grinned cheekily at Carmilla, who broke out in an unrestrained smile, pulling Laura into a tight hug and kissing the top of her head. 

Carmilla spoke into Laura’s hair, unwilling to let her go quite yet. “But really Laura, be honest with me. If this gets to be too much, if she’s too much or I’m too much or all of this is beyond what you can deal with, just please be honest with me. It will crush me faster to think that you’re forcing your giant heart to take on more than you can. Hell, you have your own life and a school to worry about. I promise you I will do everything I can to make sure this doesn’t come down on you or LaF.”

Laura leaned back and met Carmilla’s eyes, her hands reaching for the girl’s.

“I do have my own life, and I get to choose what to do with it. I know there’s untold amounts of stories and life experiences we haven’t shared yet, but trust that I know what I can handle. You’re coming to me like this is a part of you that’s broken and that I shouldn’t want, Carm- I don’t see it that way. You have been the recipient of your mother’s ire, that much is clear, but the person you’ve shown me, whether the part that flirted with me when she shouldn’t have, or let so much passion loose to speak about your work, or that let me peel away those layers and lay spread bare and vulnerable beneath me...I can’t help the pull I feel toward you. I want to explore that. I would want to explore that if we were in Topeka, or Styria, or here, soon to be under the gaze of a dangerous woman you can’t trust. Life is too damn short, Carmilla, for me to walk away from how you make me feel.”

Carmilla kissed Laura soundly.

When they separated, Carmilla glanced out the window and noticed this curve of the return trip had brought them closer to her green friend, and she pulled a surprised Laura out of the inside seating and wove her way toward the back of the top deck.

Squeezing along the rear railing between a Polish family on vacation and a pair so entwined in each other they clearly didn’t care where they were, Carmilla positioned Laura between herself and the railing, both facing the bay.

Carmilla slid her arms around Laura’s waist and put her mouth near the girl’s ear.

“This is what I have to say to that, Laura Hollis. As long as my green friend stands in this harbor, I will do right by this chance you’ve given me, given us.”

Laura turned herself in Carmilla’s arms and leaned back against the railing. She leaned forward and gently captured Carmilla’s lips in a gentle kiss. They traded kisses softly, each the echo of a promise.

—

Carmilla rolled them and Laura landed on her back, chest heaving. The dark haired girl left a trail of heated kisses down her lover’s sweat slicked chest, nipping at Laura’s sides until the girl started laughing.

“Enough! Enough! I yield!”

Carmilla chuckled and nipped the underside of Laura’s breast as she moved back up the girl’s body, pressing their lips together as she settled her weight above Laura.

“We should make potentially life altering decisions more often,” Laura joked as they finally broke for air.

Carmilla smirked. “I’d say you definitely benefitted from that decision, personally.”

Laura’s answering smile was ten shades too deadly.

“You should watch yourself, Miss Karnstein. That kind of lip will get you in trouble.”

Carmilla smirked back. “I didn’t hear you complaining about my lips, or tongue, or fingers earlier, Director Hollis.”

Laura rocked her hips up against Carmilla’s and felt a smug smile pull at her lips as the dark haired girl sucked in a jolted breath and bit at her lip in surprise and pleasure. Their wet skin met easily, curls tangling as Laura grazed herself against Carmilla.

“I thought you yielded,” Carmilla rasped, her voice strained at the feeling of Laura slowly grinding them together, her clit brushing against Laura’s, pressure quickly building at the wet friction.

“Mm, I would, but there’s this sexy creature in my bed, and if I really tire her out, she curls up with me and nearly purrs.” Laura’s tone was light but devious, her hips gently increasing the pace of their movements.

“Fucking hell, Laura,” Carmilla tipped her hips to better their angle and began to meet the blonde’s tempo, raising herself up on her arms for better leverage.

“Look at me, Carmilla.”

Carmilla obeyed, her pleasure hazed eyes moving from the seductive sight of the slippery join of their bodies to Laura’s heated gaze, passing the delightful mile of Laura’s flexing abs between, a groan escaping her lips.

“You want this badly, don’t you my good girl?”

Carmilla let out a small gasp and nodded, her hips stuttering slightly.

“You’re so close, aren’t you?”

Carmilla moaned.

Laura grunted and reached up to take hold of Carmilla’s hips, using her core strength to drive her hips faster, Carmilla slipping in her ability to maintain eye contact as their arousal slicked bodies’ friction threatened to crash down on her.

“Keep looking at me, good girl. I need you to look at me, I need to see you when you let go. That’s it, my girl. I know it’s hard right now, isn’t it? It won’t be much longer though, you’re so close for me.”

Carmilla’s eyebrows knit together as she focused the few brain cells not carried along by her impending torrential orgasm on keeping her eyes glued to Laura’s. The girl’s teasing words were accurate, she was hanging on by a thread, her cunt throbbing; Laura’s slicked body against her a seductive tide she was happy to drown in.

“You’re so close baby, I can feel it, I can see it in how hard you’re trying to hold yourself together, but it’s ok, good girl. You’re my girl now, and my girl unravels beautifully. Show me, Carm, show me what beauty belongs to me. What is mine.”

“Oh _shit_ , Laura!” Carmilla cried out the girl’s name, unable to tear her eyes from Laura’s and the fierce possessive glint in them. Her body convulsed, jerking wildly, but it didn’t matter, Laura followed her with a hiss, her fingers digging into Carmilla’s hips as they bucked together.

Panting through their aftershocks, they grinned lazily at each other, Carmilla dropping her head to gently rest against Laura’s chest, her weight still on her hands. She breathed out a deep heaving breath and Laura chuckled, reaching up for Carmilla and pulling her down on top of herself.

As Carmilla settled her weight, her head on Laura’s stomach, she felt the girl’s hands as they began to run slowly through her hair, and the comfort it provided helped to slow her racing heart.

“Mm, that feels good.”

An answering hum came from above her and Carmilla’s eyes slipped closed, Laura’s fingers lulling her into relaxation.

“I like that you’re mine.”

“I do too. That was _hot_.”

Laura chuckled.

“Rest now, Carm. I’ve got you.”

—

Carmilla swiped her keycard and opened the door to her office, humming happily to herself. She plopped a danish-filled bag on Kirsch’s desk before weaving her way over to Perry’s and placing asteaming latte in her surprised hand, continuing on to her own desk and setting her bag down, completely oblivious to the suspicious twin eyebrow raises she was receiving.

In almost mirror movements, Kirsch and Perry left their desks and stalked toward Carmilla, both coming to lean on the edge of her cubicle wall. They spoke simultaneously.

“So I take it your-”

“What did you do with-”

Perry glared at Kirsch and he ducked his head, letting her take the lead.

“Carmilla. As much as I love lattes, this is highly irregular for you. You must understand it causes me to be a bit more concerned than I am generally. Has something happened?”

Kirsch just grinned at Carmilla, who was still realizing that her two friends had descended upon her, her own thoughts on the morning’s earlier shared and soapy fun before work. She gently rubbed a spot above her heart over her shirt, the bruise of the possessive mark Laura had given her distractingly sore.

“Ah. Well,” Carmilla looked almost chastened, here was when leaving Perry out of details sometimes came back to bite her in the ass. “I may have met someone.”

“Carmilla!”

She cringed at the volume of Perry’s voice. 

“Keep it down, will ya? The whole department doesn’t need to know!”

Perry twitched and smoothed an invisible bump in her sweater.

“You are quite right about that. I apologize. That was not what I was expecting you to say. When did this happen?” Perry’s face was a mix of concern and delight.

“Uh. I met them on Friday.”

“Did you go out after work?” Perry tilted her head.

“Sort of? Mattie made me go to a fundraiser.”

“And what is their name?”

Carmilla cringed and Kirsch gave her a knowing look.

“It’s, ah, it’s Laura.”

“Laura?” Perry’s eyes flashed as she made the connection.

“Laura _Hollis_?!”

“Yes?” It came out more a question than a statement and Perry frowned, her eyebrows knitting deeply.

“Carmilla! This is so inappropriate. You can’t let her seduce you into writing her proposal! And you! I bet you encouraged this, by the grin on your face. I swear, the two of you!”

Kirsch and Carmilla shared a look and Carmilla raised her hands in an attempt to placate the very upset Perry.

“Mea culpa, Perry. I should have said something yesterday but you were just so happy about your cookies and I wasn’t sure where Laura and I stood yet. She doesn’t want me for my job, Per. I promise you. And...well, there’s one more thing.”

“Oh?” Perry’s voice was slightly colder, and Carmilla knew she had hurt the girl’s feelings by keeping this from her.

“I’m sorry, Per. It’s been a crazy few days.”

“You should have told me, Carmilla. I’m your friend.” The hurt leaked through Perry’s armor and Carmilla put her hand on top of Perry’s.

“You’re right. I should have.”

Perry straightened and shook herself back together.

“So what’s this other thing?”

Carmilla took a breath. “Well, my mother’s coming to town.”

Perry’s eyes narrowed and she stood even straighter.

“That is an unhelpful development. Why?”

Carmilla sighed. “Don’t know. Mattie thinks we’ll be required to appear at dinner on Saturday. Figure we’ll find out then. I just have to make sure my mother stays away from Laura.”

Perry and Kirsch both nodded.

“Totally, bro. However we can help.”

Carmilla smiled at her friends.

“Thanks, guys. I really appreciate it. Hope you’re still going to have your taste testing on Sunday, Per. I’ll probably be in need of some chocolate for sure.”

Perry’s face lit up. She could definitely help her friend this way.

“You can bring Miss Hollis with you. I’d like to meet her.”

Carmilla smiled.

“Can do, Perry.”

Perry nodded, satisfied, and moved back toward her desk.

Kirsch inclined his head toward Carmilla.

“So I take it the conversation went well?”

Carmilla’s grin lit her face and she couldn’t help the fluttery feeling that invaded her chest.

“It really did, Kirsch. She wants to try, for me. She wants to see if there could be an us.”

“That’s great, Carmilla! Did you tell her about your mother?”

“Some, enough to explain, but I’m going to tell her everything. We uh, got a little distracted later on.”

Kirsch chuckled. “I bet you did.”

Carmilla shrugged with a wicked smile. “Come on Sunday and see if you blame me.”

Kirsch just laughed and walked back toward his own desk.

—

Carmilla’s phone vibrated on her desk and she picked it up.

_[Creampuff]: I just got out of the longest meeting evar_

Carmilla’s phone went off again and it was a picture of Laura making an exaggerated tortured face, her tongue lolling out of her mouth and her eyes rolled back. Carmilla chuckled to herself.

[ _Me]: I’m glad you survived!_

_[Creampuff]: I only stayed sane thinking about that thing you tried this morning._

_[Me]: Oh yeah? Definitely sounded like you enjoyed it. ;-p_

Carmilla’s grin was almost predatory.

_[Creampuff]: Mhm. Am I going to see you tonight?_

_[Me]: My place or yours?_

_[Creampuff]: As long as I get you naked and under me, I don’t care._

_[Me]: Trying to make me squirm while I’m at work?_

_[Creampuff]: Rather it was you squirming on my tongue, but I’ll take what I can get._

A throat clearing above her stopped her from responding and she looked up into brown eyes.

“Hey Callis, What brings you down here?”

“Got a few minutes? I just got out of a meeting with the Mayor and the Chancellor and I think we’re going to be making a push on that new program, gotta love an election year.”

“Yeah, sure.”

She grabbed a notebook and followed Mel’s measured footsteps into the Launchpad.

—

Carmilla knocked on Laura’s door, it was Friday night and other than the now impending doom of her mother’s arrival tomorrow, she had had a banner week and rode high on the feeling of it. Mel had tasked her with a new project, something to occupy a new part of her brain, and each night had ended sweaty and tangled with Laura in bed, deliciously satiated but never for long.

Laura’s door opened as she finished knocking and a hand shot out, grabbing the lapel of Carmilla’s jacket and yanking her inside. She was quickly shoved against the interior wall and a searing hot set of lips found her pulse point, Laura’s hands palming her hips before sliding around to cup her ass.

“Ten hours is _much_ too long for me to not have my hands on you,” Laura’s voice was husky and low, her hands insistent in moving to the button of Carmilla’s pants, even as her mouth and tongue wound a way up her neck, Laura’s teeth biting her earlobe. Carmilla arched her neck, Laura humming her approval as she bit down on the soft skin. Carmilla groaned as she heard the zipper lowering and a warm hand moved to where she was already ready and aching for Laura’s touch.

“Mmm my girl, always so wet for me.” The words were purred against the curve of her ear, Laura’s fingers sliding through Carmilla’s slick heat and she shivered, biting her lip. Laura slipped her other hand up under Carmilla’s shirt and palmed the girl’s breast, her thumb circling the girl’s nipple, poking hard against the soft shell of her bra. The dark haired girl threw her head back and moaned.

“Laura, you keep doing that and I’m not going to be able to stand up.”

Laura nipped at her throat. “You’d better find a way because you’re not going anywhere until you come for me.”

Carmilla’s hips jerked at Laura’s words and she wrapped both of her hands around Laura’s muscled shoulders, her head falling forward. Her orgasm was building quickly between Laura’s fingers expertly teasing her clit and her other hand now under the cup of her bra, rolling and pinching her nipple. She groaned as Laura left her clit behind and managed to slide two fingers inside her, thrusting as best she could in the confines.

“Yes my girl, just like that,” Laura found Carmilla’s lips and the heat between them intensified. Carmilla could feel the muscles in her legs starting to shake, but she knew she wouldn’t last long, Laura’s ceaseless fingers were driving her so close to the edge.

Laura’s palm ground against Carmilla’s clit and that was enough, she cried out into Laura’s mouth and clutched at the girl as she shuddered through her orgasm, Laura holding her weight.

“Fuck. Fuck, Laura, oh hell.”

Laura’s grin was Cheshire large as she removed her fingers from Carmilla’s cunt and brought them to her mouth, making a show of licking them clean. Carmilla slumped against the wall, her breath ragged and her heart still beating against her chest.

Laura dropped to her knees and affectionately kissed the bit of skin between Carmilla’s ruined underwear and her belly button before zipping her back up and standing, the grin still sprawled across her face.

“Honey, you’re home?”

Carmilla laughed and pulled Laura into a hug, speaking into her ear.

“You greet me like that, and I’ll certainly keep showing up.”

Their lips met, both women still marveling that they’d found the other, glorying in the newness and heat between them. Carmilla broke the kiss to tuck her head into the curve of Laura’s neck, the girl’s arms tightening around her waist.

“I’m glad you’re here. Tomorrow’s really going to suck.”

She felt Laura sigh and snuggled closer.

“Has Mattie updated you at all?”

Carmilla shook her head into Laura’s shoulder.

“No, I was hoping to hear from her by now, but she hasn’t said anything. I’m going to call her in the morning if I don’t hear by then.”

Laura turned her head and kissed Carmilla’s cheek.

“Good plan. Now, to the food!”

She untangled Carmilla from her and pulled the girl by both arms into the kitchen. Carmilla’s eyebrows raised in surprise, Laura had laid out a whole romantic dinner for them, complete with two white taper candles.

“Welcome to Chez Hollis, madame. Please take your seat.”

Laura pulled the chair out for Carmilla and gave her a gentle kiss after she sat, moving to light the two candles.

“I know tomorrow’s dinner isn’t going to be enjoyable, so I wanted to make the one before it much better.” Laura gave Carmilla a sweet smile and the girl marveled at her, still unused to earnest affection.

Laura turned back to her kitchen counter, manipulating cartons in front of her before carrying two plates back to the table, placing one in front of each of them.

“Penne a la vodka with garlic bread and side salad. Only the finest delivery for my girl.”

Carmilla’s smile threatened to stretch her mouth beyond its limits, the girl in front of her was effortlessly, seamlessly invading her heart, and this time it didn’t make her fearful. She reached for Laura’s hand across the table, squeezing when the soft palm slipped into hers.

“Thank you, Laura. Truly. This looks incredible.”

Both women started to eat in companionable silence, the candles flickering soft patterns against the table between them. Few moments passed without a smile slipping back and forth across their faces, the little bubble of Laura’s apartment frozen in time while they ate, mothers and work and obligations far away.

—

Carmilla sighed and snuggled further into Laura’s lap, the movie on the screen in front of her mostly forgotten.

“Kiss for your thoughts?”

Carmilla turned her head and saw Laura’s gentle look, the light behind her turning her hair into a honey halo.

“Tomorrow.”

“That deserves a good one.”

Laura leaned down and pressed her lips to Carmilla’s before pulling back, Carmilla chasing her mouth to keep the kiss going, Laura happily obliging. Carmilla broke the kiss only for the awkward angle and sat up, turning her body back toward Laura and let her head fall against the back of the couch.

“Can I just kiss you until Sunday?”

Laura quirked a half smile.

“You could, but we both know you won’t.”

Carmilla shrugged, resigned. “Yeah, true.”

Fiddling with a loose thread on her jeans, Laura felt the unasked questions she’d been holding back bubbling up from inside her.

“Carm?”

The girl lifted an eyebrow.

“Could you, would you mind um, telling me what happened with your mother? You don’t have to tell me, if you don’t want- I just, I know I’m missing a lot.”

Carmilla sighed and reached for Laura’s hand and pulled it into her lap, playing with the girl’s fingers.

“Might as well get comfy and buckle up, Creampuff. It’s a bit of a ride.” She smiled at Laura, but it didn’t quite reach her eyes.

“When I was born, Mother and my father and Mattie and I lived in a big house outside of Stamford, in Connecticut. As far as I knew, it was a happy childhood. My father adored Mattie and spent as much time as he could with both of us, annoying my mother often with making us late for our lessons. Mother was insistent we learn German, to help with the business when we were grown. Mattie, being older, also took music and elocution lessons, which you can see she still makes use of.”

Carmilla’s smile was wry, her mind lost in her memories but Laura met it with her own. “I bet Mattie was quite a handful then.”

Carmilla’s smile turned playful. “That she was, until she went off to boarding school. Never give a brilliant person the tools to become a master strategist and access to a dorm full of impressionable minds. The whole school bowed down to her within a semester.”

Laura couldn’t help the chuckle that escaped her.

“You laugh, but Mattie ran a well oiled machine. Contraband, test results, boyfriends, girlfriends; she had quite the kingdom set up.”

“With Mattie gone and Will barely not a baby, the focus fell on me. I excelled at whatever Mother threw at me, but instead of being pleased by the ridiculous rate I inhaled everything, it seemed almost to make her angrier. She started to speak to me with little warmth, unless my father was around, when she’d act like nothing was amiss.”

“I always chalked it up to being no longer the baby of the family, but after my father started getting sick and was less and less about the house, she dropped all pretense, and I started to see her true self. She locked me in a hall closet for almost a day once, when my father was in the hospital getting chemo. I had begged her all morning to have our driver take me there so I could keep reading with my father, we were working through Redwall and had started to get to the good parts. Mother had an event that night, and I suppose a child under her feet was too much, Will easily handled by his nannies. I knew I had gone too far when she snapped at me in front of some of her investors that she had been wining on the veranda. She grabbed my arm, hard enough that later I wore her handprint, and dragged me through the house and upstairs. I stayed silent, her face only spoke of fury. She threw me into a linen closet and locked the door.

“I was in there for 18 long hours, in the dark. After the first few hours, when my tears and voice were both used up, I built myself a nest of towels and blankets and fell asleep. I had the most vivid dreams about my future, and when I woke, I vowed I wouldn’t ever let her touch me like that again. Wouldn’t ever be that vulnerable. I would become ice as flesh, raging river underneath. I was six.”

Laura squeezed Carmilla’s hand and she squeezed back, giving Laura a sad smile.

“Two weeks before my 8th birthday, my father died and everything changed. I didn’t know then what I do now, my world just shattered into the millions of pieces my father was no longer in. I cried for him for days, couldn’t even go to the funeral, which I supposed pleased Mother anyway. Mattie came home from school and would check on me in the days afterward, but Mother let me flounder, lost in my own pain.”

“The day I turned eight, she shipped me off to boarding school. Didn’t matter it was the middle of the year, or that I had people I might have liked to call friends, if I saw them outside of school, which of course I’d never been allowed. I was afforded one suitcase to pack; didn’t get to see Mattie or Will to say goodbye. I wasn’t home again for ten years.”

“Ten years??” The word’s were out of Laura’s mouth before she could stop them. Carmilla grimaced at her volume and nodded. 

“Yeah. Maman sent me to what the very rich call a “therapeutic boarding school”. It was a step above military school, but not by much. Thankfully it did believe in the humanities, or I’d have lost my fucking mind. After months had gone by, I was finally able to look outside my anguish and take sense of my surroundings. I found there was a lot to learn. First off, most of the other kids there were seasoned troublemakers, and well, when you’re a scrawny 8 year old, you have to learn fast to defend yourself. I figured out how easy it was to manipulate people, and when I grew into my body, found how easy that knowledge plus a hinted promise never fulfilled could get me whatever I wanted.”

“I channeled my rage at my mother into learning everything about her and the company, about my father’s business dealings and Mattie’s father too. I looked up long buried records, annoyed former business associates; eventually though, I hit a wall. I was beside myself. I knew there had to be more, but I didn’t know where else to look. I couldn’t hack into anything like my mother’s security system, I’m not that good at that stuff, unfortunately.”

“On my sixteenth birthday, I received a package at school. This came as quite a surprise, other than the phones Mattie mailed me every two years so we could talk, I never got any mail. I brought the plain looking thick brown envelope up to my room, thankfully I had a single at this point, and sat down on my bed to open it. First I pulled out a letter from my father’s lawyer, a man I had never heard of, saying my father had wished me to have this, but at a time in which it would be understood the way he meant it. Which just confused the hell out of me. Inside the envelope was a leather journal. My father’s journal, which he always had with him.”

“I opened it up and he had written me a letter of his own, which I had to read through tears, expressing his love for me and his sadness that he had to leave us. He wrote that what I was going to read would be painful, but was the absolute truth. He wanted me to know, and wanted me to choose what to do with the information.”

Carmilla paused and took in a long breath. She’d never told anyone this before, it was the part not even Mattie knew. Laura watched her patiently, giving her the space to collect herself.

“The first half of the book was his end of day recollections of the years that passed, many things I’d forgotten about, Mattie and I getting in trouble or trips we had taken. Some about work, but most of it was his thoughts about his family, his writing about Will’s birth made me ache for how much I missed them both. He wrote sparingly about my mother, I think he kept those thoughts private even to the page. Or so I thought.”

“His writing began to change and I realized it was when he began to get sick. He stopped writing so much about us and paced out long pages about his confusion over what his body was doing, his anger, sadness and grief already building. It was so painful to read, already knowing where the story ended. About a year and a half into his entries about being sick, he started alluding to discovering something, that he thought he must be crazy for concluding. He wrote about it without name for months, kept mentioning the schedules of certain nurses, when he received what medication and from which person. When he finally wrote his conclusion, I had to throw the journal away from myself. My stomach started heaving and I lost my birthday lunch into my garbage can.”

Carmilla scooted closer to Laura on the couch, pulling one of Laura’s arms around herself and snuggling into her shoulder. She couldn’t make eye contact with Laura, but she needed to feel the girl, needed to ground herself to say the words she’d never said aloud, only played on an endless loop in her mind for years. Laura adjusted herself to curl around Carmilla further and she felt the girl relax slightly.

“Laura, I’ve never told anyone what I’m about to say, but I need you to understand something, this is has been my reality for eleven years. I know you’re going to want to help, but believe me, I’ve thought of every angle, scoured every shadow over this. I just need you to listen, as big and beautiful as your helpful heart is, ok? I want to tell you, but I don’t want to discuss it, if that’s ok?”

Lara nodded and pressed a gentle kiss to Carmilla’s temple. Carmilla twitched her head in acknowledgment, her eyes focused somewhere beyond her and nowhere at all. She swallowed and let Laura all the way in.

“My father had studied enough, and used the few resources he still could to figure out that while he did in fact have cancer, it would have been in remission, if it wasn’t being helped along by some kind of poison being masked as medication. He left the information of one of the nurses, connected to my mother through a buried contract several years earlier. By this point, he had lost the ability to speak, but his writing burns with how frustrated and lost he felt. It broke him to realize Maman truly only wanted him for his empire, that if she had ever truly loved him, it had burned out long before. He knew his body was already breaking down too far to save, but he wanted there to be a record so he took down everything he could, all the details his brain could remember. He left a near perfect case, something I could bring to be prosecuted, but with one snag.”

“I needed the mysterious lawyer to corroborate. I haven’t been able to find him anywhere. It’s like he sent me the journal and got on a spaceship and fucked off to wherever Jodie Foster went in Contact.”

Carmilla huffed our a breath and leaned her head back against Laura’s arm.

“Between finding the journal and getting here there’s a lot more stuff but I’m finding I’m very-“ she lost the urge to yawn and did, loudly.

“Tired?” Laura supplied with a small grin. Carmilla snuggled further into Laura and sighed.

“Mm, tired. I want to tell you the rest but I think the tank is empty for now. I don’t mean to leave it on what seems like a cliffhanger, but that’s the big thing. When I was sixteen, my father reached back from the grave to tell me that the mother who hated me killed him for his money.”

Carmilla felt the wet on her arms before she realized she was crying silently, the river of tears falling without protest. Laura noticed but said nothing, only hugged her tighter. Carmilla was too tired to fight it and sobbed in Laura’s arms, finally safe to express some of what she’d been the sole keeper of.

When she was finally calm again, she nuzzled into Laura’s neck, placing small feather light kisses against the girl’s skin. Laura hummed low from the back of her throat and gave Carmilla better access, the soft kisses moving up her neck and along her jaw. Carmilla tilted Laura’s chin back and kissed her, her hand cupping Laura’s face.

“Thank you, Laura,” she said, when Laura pulled back to meet her eyes again.

“You make me feel safe.” Laura kissed her again and smiled.

“Come to bed with me.”

Carmilla smiled and took Laura’s hand once it was offered, being easily pulled off the couch by the girl. Laura led them into her bedroom, shutting everything off as they went. She kept the lights off but pulled Carmilla to her, enveloping her in a tight embrace.

“You’re so strong, Carmilla. And I appreciate so much that you decided to trust me with what is happening in your life. I have so many feelings about your mother now, but know that no matter what happens tomorrow, you have me. I’m on Team Karnstein. Ok?”

Carmilla nodded and felt her chest tighten with confused happiness. Laura really did make her feel safe, and the fluttery feelings that line of thought produced overrode her sadness at speaking of her father. With Laura, she didn’t feel alone.

Laura slowly undressed Carmilla, taking care to gently kiss each piece of skin as it was revealed before tucking them both into bed. She wrapped her body along Carmilla’s, her arm curling around the girl’s hip and her head tucking in behind jet black hair. 

“I have you, Carmilla. No matter what,” she murmured to the girl in front of her, her eyes slipping closed.

Carmilla soaked in the feeling of being in Laura’s arms, her breathing relaxing until it matched Laura’s measured pace. Her thoughts drifted to the girl behind her, so quick to offer support and share her burdens; she knew she was incredibly lucky to be in someone’s arms who cared about her, even if everything was such a new whirlwind. She kept expecting her brain to find a warning alarm to set off, but they had all been almost disturbingly silent. She had thrown caution to the wind tonight and she was heartened by how Laura had reacted, giving her what she needed almost without Carmilla needing to say. The dinner had touched her, Laura going that extra step to acknowledge but not push at what Carmilla was facing.

She snuggled further into Laura’s arms, miraculously finding easy sleep waiting for her when she closed her eyes.


End file.
